During Freshers Week I joined the Glasgow University Gilbert & Sullivan Society and the Glasgow University Debating Club.
THE GILBERT & SULLIVAN CLUB
The G&S Soc is unusual since it allows non-students to join. They put on 2 shows each year. It was here that I first met Vera, who was 20 years my senior. She wasn't a student but was an accomplished singer and actress.
She played the elderly Ruth in "The Pirates of Penzance" while I was in the chorus as one of the (cowardly) Cornish Policemen. I have a fondness for older women and I fancied Vera. I liked being in her company.
THE AFTER SHOW PARTY.
One of the many joys of being in a G&S production is the After Show party. The person who played the Pirate King was a babe magnet, and the girls who played 'the bevvy of beauties" flocked round him.
I am not a great drinker and I am not a handsome hunk. I am also a bit shy when in social situations. I drank too much and woke up the next morning feeling rough.
But I was shocked to find that I had Vera as a bedmate. I assumed that I was in her house. I was naked and Vera wore a cotton nightie that hid her beautiful, large tits.
Vera said "What do you want to have for breakfast?"
I replied "Scrambled egg on toast and white coffee with no sugar would be great."
I couldn't recall leaving the party, nor how I had got to sleep beside Vera. I didn't know if I had fucked her, but I suspected that I had.
Vera said "If you need the loo put on a dressing gown, I don't want my son seeing you in the all-together. He is in the other bedroom. His name is Peter. He's 14 and can be stroppy, but his heart is in the right place."
Vera wore a wedding ring.
She added "My husband left me a decade ago to shack up with a younger woman. He is a Catholic and doesn't want us to have a divorce. But give the bastard his due, he is good at maintenance payments."
I said "So, technically, you and I committed adultery last night. I hope he doesn't come in with a gun."
Vera mock-smiled and asked "Am I just another notch on your belt?"
I replied "I have only 1 other notch. And she was a one night stand. How about you?"
Vera replied "I have 3 notches, but nothing serious. Men don't like women with a son. Am I just a post-party lay?"
I said "I'm not put off by Peter, even if he is stroppy. You are sexy and talented, and nature has been kind to you, unlike Ruth."
In the play Ruth is described as "on the whole plain" and she has "the remains of a beauty".
I said "I want to meet you again. How about going to the King's Theatre for a show? Would Peter like "Return To The Forbidden Planet?" It is billed as "Shakespeare's forgotten rock and roll masterpiece", I.have seen it and I can see why it won the Olivier Award for Best New Musical.
VERA AND I BECOME AN ITEM
I thought that Peter might not like the rock and roll musical,
I said to Vera "If your son doesn't like the show we will all leave together during the first interval. But I honestly think he will enjoy the music."
Vera said "You are the first man who has invited Peter and I on a date."
I was pleased.
Vera asked "My son will be 14 next month. Do you mind if we take him for a burger at the Ubiquitous Chip. It's something that I reserve for his birthday treat."
The Ubiquitous Chip was (and still is) a high-class eatery in Glasgow's West End.
I said "Its little wonder that you reserve it as a birthday treat. I'll part pay for it."
Peter agreed to go to the show and we enjoyed it.