I slammed the phone down in disgust. My wife had done it again. She had a nasty habit of calling me at work, on my desk phone - preventing me from stepping outside, to argue or tell me off. She knew, while in my cubicle, I couldn't raise my voice or curse or make hurtful comments or any of the other things she insisted on doing from her side. It made for very frustrating arguments. I could barely respond and had to listen to a torrent of abuse.
I sat with my head on my desk like a preschooler taking a nap. I was furious and needed a minute or two to calm down.
"Everything okay?" a soft voice asked behind me.
I sat up to find Millie, my department's tracking manager and office grandma, in my cube looking concerned.
Millie had been with the company forever and nothing would get accomplished without her. She knew the inner workings and politics of the company backward and forward. She kept it all together and we all knew it ... and counted on it.
I have no idea how old Millie was, she had to be at least 60. She was a large African American woman with uneven, blotchy dark skin. Her hair was short and brittle looking. She had broad shoulders and even broader hips, thick legs and a full ass. Her breasts were enormous and must have been something to see in her youth, but now they drooped sadly across her protruding belly -- they were still large, but soft and tired. Millie often rested her crossed arms on top of those melons, pushing them even further south.
That was exactly what she was doing when I turned to face her. She was wearing what she always wore: a long draping, pleated skirt and a tight, sleeveless sweater. The dark circles under her eyes made her look sad, but she was really very pleasant.
"Trouble at home?" she continued, her rough elbows pressing down on her tits.
I don't know if it was the calm of her voice or the size of her chest, but the frustration came pouring out of me.
"Yeah," I said angrily, talking a mile a minute, "My wife is pissing me off. If it's not one thing, it's another. She is always mad at me about something. She pushes the issue until you don't want to hear it anymore. I'm tired of trying to hold it all together. I'm tired of taking all the blame. I'm tired of being the fall-guy. I'm tired of her lame excuses and don't want to hear them anymore."
I turned away from her.
"I just want a quiet evening - one without any fights. I want a nice meal and maybe a fucking movie," I ranted, picking up my stapler and having it jam when I tried to use it, "Dammit! I want a stapler that works and I want to get fucking laid!"
With that, I slammed the stapler onto my desk sending a plastic cup of pencils flying. I sat with my head in my hands and the rattling of the cup as it wobbled to a stop was the only sound I heard.
I looked over my shoulder and Millie had left. Damn. I felt like a total heel. She had come to check on me and I had exploded. She probably thought it best to give me some distance -- she was probably worried about her own safety; I was acting like a lunatic.
I needed to apologize and convince her I wasn't losing my mind -- even if I thought I might be.
It was late, almost 8pm, but her purse was still at her desk so she had to be around. The ladies room? No, the light looked to be off. I heard a cabinet shut and realized she was in the supply room.
I made my way down the hall and stopped short as I came to the door. Millie was bent over, digging through a cardboard box, and her sweater gaped open at the neck providing a fantastic view of her long, aged cleavage. Her breasts were tucked awkwardly into her unflattering bra.
She saw me and slowly stood up, seemingly oblivious to my stare.
"I found you a stapler," she said, handing it to me and making me feel like a bigger jerk.
"Uh, thanks," I said, taking it, "Hey, look, about my outburst back there ... I'm really sorry. That was uncalled for and very rude. I'm just very frustrated and --"
"How long has it been?" she asked, cutting me off.
"Excuse me," I said cautiously.
"How long has it been since you got laid?" she asked directly.
"Uh," I said hesitantly, "I don't know - a couple months?"
"Try seven years on for size," she said smiling, "My bell hasn't been rung in a long time."
I really had no idea what to say, but felt I should say something.