*Author's note: Insecurities seem trivial, and many are. Sometimes though, an insecurity is based on something real and gets so deeply internalized, it becomes a part of us, and occasionally, it can be debilitating. It could be anything from a lazy eye to unsightly teeth to morbid obesity to something as horrific as severe facial burns. Or it could be something unseen and even more personal.
Once that happens, it takes a special kind of person to help someone with a serious issue get beyond it. Of course, that special person has to want to deal with it, but if he or she does, it can completely turn the other person's life around.
Jordan Hanson is so good looking and outwardly confident that no one can imagine him living with an insecurity that has nearly ruined his life. Shay Henderson-Marino is the kind of special person who shows him how loves conquers all.
*****
"So I hear your ex is getting married. You doing okay?"
"Yeah. Sure. It's fine. I'm actually happy for him," her best friend said.
"You're a saint, Shay. I was ready to kill my ex when he told me he was getting married again."
"As a police officer, killing him wouldn't have been hard to do, but as a police officer you probably wouldn't enjoy prison all that much."
Her lifelong friend laughed and told her she was right.
"Cops don't do well in prison. Or...former cops, rather."
Her best friend, Stacey Thompson, was now a lieutenant in their still reasonably-small town of Lebanon, Pennsylvania. She'd worked her way up from patrolman to sergeant, and as of a year ago, she was now the number three person in the department.
The senior police officer smiled then said, "If you're okay with it then I suppose that's fine."
"Besides," her friend said, "I've got something kind of nice going on, remember?"
"Oh, right. With the youth pastor." Stacey asked as she recalled the name of the new youth pastor at one of the local churches. She smiled when she thought about how the actual pastor was maybe 35, if that, while this youth pastor was closer to 50.
"Yes. With Ted. He's a really nice guy, you know? And he's pretty good looking which never hurts."
"No, it doesn't. And nice is...okay," Stacey replied without much conviction.
"But?"
"Well, I don't know. If you're just kind of dating and it isn't serious, then nice really is fine. But do you want to get serious with someone who doesn't make your heart go pitter-patter?"
"Stacey, I'm 46. I have a 17-old daughter. I work a in flower shop and barely get by. Ted provides a kind of...anchor. He's the stability I need right now."
"You don't have to convince me, Shay. If it works for you, great. And I'm the same age you are, so there's no need to remind me about that. Lord knows the mirror does enough of that every morning."
"Hey. Stop that! You look great," Shay said supportively.
"Ha! I look...nice. I look...okay—for my age," Stacey replied. "You, on the other hand. You...make me sick!"
Both of them laughed, but both of them knew she was right. Shay Marino, who was in the process of changing her name back to Henderson, was unreasonably attractive for a woman their age.
Stacey couldn't hold it against her. It was largely the luck of the draw along with a lot of dieting and hard work on Shay's part. Both of them had had a child, but Shay was back in a size four a year later while Stacey still battled her weight and was thrilled to get into a ten—on occasion.
And it wasn't just her figure. Shay had thick, gorgeous, dark hair that didn't have a single strand of gray in it. And she could and still did wear it to her shoulders. Stacey had given up and cut hers above her ears not long after her ex announced he was leaving. Adding insult to injury, Shay still had soft, smooth, wrinkle-free skin while Stacey battled laugh lines, crow's feet, turkey neck, flabby underarms, cellulite, and everything else most women their age dealt with and hated.
Most women. Shay wasn't one of them.
Again, it was no one's fault. Shay had the genes and because she also worked very hard at it, she also had—the jeans. Tiny, size-four jeans that showed off her tight, round tushy in a way that always drew looks from men half her age.
Once they stopped laughing Stacey said, "Question. Why don't you renew your real estate license and get back into the business? I know how much you love your job, but as you just said, you're barely getting by. The market's on fire, and you could make a lot more money."
"I know. You're absolutely right. It's just that I got so spoiled being able to work a fun job I enjoy that the thought of going back to something more demanding—and stressful—is hard to imagine. But the extra money would be nice."
"Well, think about it, okay? Maybe just give it a little consideration in your spare time."
"I will," Shay promised before saying, "And I'm really glad you stopped by. We don't see each other often enough."
"I know. It's just so hard with work. When I get off all I want to do is go home and have a glass of wine and zone out."
Stacey laughed then said, "Maybe that's why my butt hasn't looked like yours since before we had kids."
"Your butt is just fine," Shay told her. "In fact, how are things going with that detective of yours?"
"They're not," Stacey told her. "It's just too hard, you know? He works for me, and a woman giving orders to a man she's dating, is a big 'no-go'."
"I'm sorry to hear that. He's kind of cute. A little young, but very nice looking."
"Well, maybe you could give it a whirl. He's not that young."
Shay looked at her friend who immediately understood why and said, "Oh, right. Sorry. Pastor Ted. You really are a saint."
Stacey hesitated, then decided to ask because best friends could ask anything.
"With him being a man of God and all, do you guys ever...you know..."
Shay laughed then said, "No. Never. But it's way too early for that anyway."
"Six weeks is too early? Really?"
Shay stopped and thought about it for a second then replied.
"It's not that I'm not ready. It's just...complicated."
"By his job title," Stacey said without judgment. "How long's it been?"
