SamNY: Hi, I saw your profile and would love to introduce myself. I'm Sam, and I think you're beautiful. I'm only thirty but I've been told I'm very wise beyond my years. I'd love to meet you and take you out to dinner, sometime.
Hornedhousewife: Hello! Your profile picture is cute, but I really will have to decline your invitation. I'm married with kids, besides I'm way too old for you. I'm sorry.
SamNY: Age is only a number, isn't it? You're only 64, after all. You really look forty if you want to be honest.
Hornedhousewife: You're adorable, thanks for the compliment, but I'm old enough to be your grandmother. I really can't. But I'm flattered. I hope you find a nice girl on the website.
SamNY: You're very nice to say that. I thought you were that nice girl, but that's my crappy luck. If the marriage thing doesn't work out, give me a message.
Hornedhousewife: It's been forty years, I don't know about that.
SamNY: Just forty?
Hornedhousewife: Lol. We can at least be friends, how's that?
SamNY: I can deal with that just fine. I don't mind friendship with a sweet person like you.
What began as a rejection transformed in to a friendship between Sam and Ellen over the course of two months. She'd spare him advice on meeting women, he'd talk to her about her retirement, and soon enough they'd become so close they'd agreed to meet up in person. He'd shown up at her house that early morning to the sound of chatter in the backyard. Ellen was even more gorgeous than he'd imagined and at sixty four she didn't seem to show any of her age. She'd worn short blonde hair and a taut slim body under a blue blouse and dark blue jeans, and she greeted him with a joyous "Hey there!" and a tight hug.
They embraced like an aunt and nephew would, patting each other's backs and instantly striking up conversation. Nothing was awkward between the pair, and he was ready to get to know her. They'd gone out to the patio where she'd readied brunch for them, and sat down across from him boasting about meeting him finally.
"How was the train ride out here?"
"It was great, very nice."
"I'm so glad we got to meet up here. I normally don't have too much company here. Especially on Sundays."
"Why's that?"
"Most of my friends host lunches at their houses."
"I would have been fine with a restaurant."
"Oh no, this is fine," she waved him away, "We can get to know one another better. It's a lot better meeting face to face."
"You're much prettier in person."
"Thank you," she chuckled.
"Hey," an older man said rushing out from the kitchen patting Sam's shoulder.
"Hello," he said surprised.
"Harold, this is my friend Sam, we met online. Sam this is my husband Harold."
"Nice to meet you."
"You're the one," Harold laughed, "She talks about you like you're her son. Always bragging and saying she's going to introduce you to her friends' daughters."
Harold didn't know that Sam was more interested in the friends, rather than their daughters by a long shot. Sam wasn't impressed with Harold who was portly and tall with a balding head of hair, but he was very friendly, which Sam hated. He found Ellen to be out of his league and couldn't help admiring her behind whenever she bent over to serve Sam a drink.
"Well, it's been good, folks," Harold waved rushing off.
"When are you coming back from golf?" Ellen asked.
"Nine o'clock, we're going for dinner afterward."
"Bye," he said kissing her and patted Sam on the shoulder, rushing off.
"He's a nice guy," Sam replied.
"He's great," she nodded.
"How are you not single? I'm still kicking myself," he chuckled.
"I posted that online ad during a separation trial with Harold, and we'd gotten together very quickly. You were the only one half my age to respond to my ad."
"Just my damn luck."
"So, tell me about you."
"I'd really rather learn more about you."
"All I do is talk about me."
"I don't mind. You have fun stories to tell. You have a nice house, I bet there's a nice story there."
"Oh, it's very old," she shrugged, "Two stories. Occasionally we have my children over, but they only visit once a month with their families."
"So you're always alone?"
"No, I have my hobbies, and clubs."
"If I were Harold I'd never leave you alone."
"Men have to be men," she shrugged.
"You said you're an artist."
"Right!"
"Do you have any art in the house?"
"In the halls, come on, I'll show you!"
"Sure," he patted his sides following her in to the house as she boasted about the art she'd painted along the walls. They stood in the hall discussing her impressive portraits, and eventually made their way to the top floor.
"Who is this beauty?"
"That's me."
"Really?"
"I was forty when I painted that of myself."
"God, you're sexy."
"Thank you," she grinned blushing, and cleared her throat attempting to cut the tension. She turned to another painting of still life, and Sam observed it.
"So can I ask you something?"
"Sure."
"If you weren't with Harry at the time I answered your ad... would you have taken me up on it?"
"I'm 64, Sam. What could we do together?"
"I can think of a few things," he hinted.
She grinned nervously, and attempting to hide her flustered face.
"I'm old enough to be your grandmother," she laughed.
"My grandmother never looked like you," he insisted.
"You were really prepared to go out with a woman twice your age?" she chortled.
"Sure, I mean you're a woman. I'm tired of being with girls."
"Well, they're not all the same. My daughter is a fine woman."
"She probably got it from you."
"Harry always says that about her," she blushed.
"Harry is a lucky guy."