My relationship of almost three years recently ended. I'll cite irreconcilable differences and dramatically different personalities. Let's leave it at that. There was no bad guy/gal, just not a good match.
I've been working out with a personal trainer for almost seven years now. I see him Mondays and Fridays for 30 minutes. Within the first 8 months I had dropped 50 pounds and I've maintained that ever since. Since this fitness center is strictly one-on-one by appointment only there isn't the opportunity for the kind of social interaction you might find at one of the big gym chains.
Two weeks after I told my trainer about the breakup, I was leaving on Monday when I noticed a note in the cap I had worn in, and where I leave my car keys. Curious, I donned the cap, pocketed the keys and looked at the note as I walked through the lot to my car. Troy, call me, please. Jan followed by her number.
Jan is a fellow fitness buff who works out with a different trainer on Monday mornings, starting earlier than me. We've occasionally said "Have a great day" or something similar as we passed, her leaving, me entering. But we've never even introduced ourselves and I only knew her name when I heard my trainer saying goodbye to her.
When I got into my car, I grabbed my iPhone and called. She answered on the second ring.
"Hello."
"Hi Jan, this is Troy. Obviously I got your note. How can I help you?"
"Troy, I hope this isn't too forward or soon, but I was hoping you'd like to have a cup of coffee with me. I would like to get to know you better."
"That would be nice, Jan. When did you have in mind?"
"No time like the present, right? If you haven't left the fitness center yet, we could meet at that new little shop just outside of town, in the old Popeye's building."
"Well, I've nothing pressing on the calendar so that's good for me."
"Great. I took a chance and I came here after my workout. What type of coffee do you like and how do you take it?"
"I like a medium roast, black."
"I'll have it waiting for you. Maybe it will cool down so you can actually drink it when you get here. See you in 5!"
"On my way."
I was actually nervous when I started the car. A bit of background: I recently hit the 7 decade mark, 5'8", 152 pounds, bald with a head I keep shaved, and a beard and mustache. And Jan is exactly my type: attractive with short, dark hair, petite, probably 5'2" or so, slim, very cute butt, and A or small B cup breasts. I've no idea how old she is but would guess mid 50's or so. And yes, I've fantasized about her but assumed the age difference would prevent her from ever being interested in me.
When I got to the coffee shop I parked right next to her SUV, which I recognized from seeing it at the fitness center. I walked in, looked around, and spotted her at a corner window table, apart from any other customers. As I walked over to her table she smiled. I suspect she saw my car as I drove into the lot.
"Hi Jan. This is a most pleasant surprise. Thank you for the coffee but you needn't have bought it. I could have gotten mine when I got here."
Jan laughed and said "I don't think the $2.50 is going to break this month's budget and as I invited you I thought it only appropriate."
"May I ask what prompted your note and invitation? We've seen each other for several years and barely spoken."
"Troy, I noticed you when I first started working out on Monday's. To be honest, I was immediately attracted to you, so I spoke with your trainer who told me you were in a relationship. Then I found out today that relationship recently ended. I don't know if you and I will hit it off, or if you're even interested in any relationship, or one with me, but I figured this was my chance. I jumped on the opportunity thinking it unlikely you're involved with anyone else this quickly. Is that okay?"
"Thank you for your honesty. I'm a very open, honest, and direct person, despite being an introvert and I admire the same qualities in others. This is very okay and I have to share that I found you attractive the first time I laid eyes on you. I never imagined you might be interested in me. I must be, what 15 or more years older than you?"
"You're 70, right? That makes you only 14 years older." Jan grinned and her eyes, make that beautiful blue eyes, twinkled as she said this.
We spent the next 30 or 45 minutes exchanging basic information - interests, where we lived, what we did (both retired) and so on. Then Jan said "Troy, I have a couple of important things to share with you. They might be dealbreakers and if so, best not to waste each other's time. Are you good with that?"
"Certainly."
"Troy, I divorced my ex nearly 5 years ago, when I found out he was having an affair. That affair afforded me a very generous settlement, including alimony. With no children involved I decided to quit working and enjoy my life. Unfortunately, I didn't discover the affair until after she infected him with herpes and he passed it along to me. I don't know how much you know about herpes but I have both type 1, which is oral, and type 2 which affects the genital area. As it happens, I have never had an outbreak of either type, which is not completely unheard of. But it also means I haven't had sex since my ex and I'm reluctant to reveal my status just to get dates."
"Jan, thank you. I'm sure that was difficult for you to share. I'm honored that you trust me enough to have done so. This is definitely not a dealbreaker for me. In face, I, too, test positive for both 1 and 2. I've never had a genital outbreak and usually only had one cold sore a year. I've not even had that for the past 4 or 5 years. Some researchers believe the virus can burn out by itself but as you know, they can't test for the virus, only the antibodies. Once you're exposed, your body creates the antibodies and they remain regardless of whether the virus is present or dead."
Jan took a deep breath and said, "Wow. Now I can breathe. That is such an incredible coincidence."
"Well, you likely know herpes is much more common than most people think, and many have it without knowing because of lack of symptoms. Or they don't realize cold sores are really herpes. But two people with mutual attraction in such a small town does seem to beat the odds."
"Agreed. So now that this is all out on the table, where do we go next?"
"I'd suggest a 'real' date. Dinner?"
"I would love that. When?"
"No time like the present, right? Are you free tonight?"
"I'm never free, but always reasonable," she laughed with that same grin and twinkle. "Tonight would be perfect. Do you have some place in mind?"
"Are you in the mood for fancy or casual?", I asked.
"I think casual to start. We could get pizza here in town, or try the Italian place up in Creedmore."
"I haven't had Italian in a while so that would be my vote, if you're up for the drive. It's only 25 minutes from my cabin but probably 35 from your place here in town."
"Since I'm clearly being forward today, I'll push my luck. I would love to see your cabin - your trainer raves about it. How about I drive out to you and we can leave from there, after a tour?"
"That's sounds great. I love showing off my cabin. Will 6 work for you? Then we can get to the restaurant by 7."