It Started as a Joe

It started out as a bit of a joke, looking at pictures on the internet of an old, large, fat, shaven woman who had posted over 500 images of her body. Some showed her partially dressed, some naked, some having sex, masturbating, and inserting objects into her cunt, even having sex with several men at one time. She looked like an aged aunt or perhaps a cleaning lady, cellulite dimpled thighs, rolls of fat covering her cleanly shaven mons, huge flaccid breasts resting on her stomach with a friendly florid round face that gave the impression she had walked off a farm.

After discovering this group I thought it great fun to flick through the hundreds of shots what a laugh, but the more of her I saw the more turned on I was becoming. Each day she posted new pictures at around lunchtime gradually I started to look forward to seeing what position she would be adopting what would her fat legs be wrapped around today, a dildo, some old guys head, a torch, assorted vegetables just about anything vaguely phallic appeared welcome inside her. Or would she be laid out naked in some crappy old car with some losers grubby fingers buried in her ample cunt. Her pictures represented a sordid underworld that my affluent middle class lifestyle seldom came across but increasingly I wanted to be a part of it having the balls to initiate a contact was the difficult part.

I sat down to eat a sandwich logged into her group and called up the latest image `Two at a Time` no prizes for guessing what was going on, an overweight hirsute middle aged man was taking her from behind while she gave a balding pensioner a blow job. Her belly and tits hung down on the gaudy bedspread all appeared to be enjoying themselves. The next picture posted was her outdoors sitting on a chequered blanket, neat hair, pearl earrings, bare chested empty tits sagging down with pale nipples pointed at the ground. Her spotted skirt had risen up to her waist revealing the trademark shaven pussy, her cunt lips were puffy and what appeared to be cum was seeping out on to the rug. There was cum seeping out in my office I had never been so turned on by a picture yet this woman was ugly, fat, dirty and around twenty years older than me.

I emailed her to explain my reaction to the pictures not really expecting a response but she mailed back immediately with a picture of her spread eagled across the front of an old Toyota with a fat hairy bald male fucking her from behind, her head was turned to the camera a broad grin across her moon face. Beneath she asked me some basic details about myself and explained that she was married with an older disinterested husband and liked afternoon sessions especially outdoors. Over the following days we mailed each other frequently discussing her sex acts and what I would like to do to her, she claimed to live around fifty miles from my office but I was skeptical half expecting the whole thing to be a fraud, then she mailed me a telephone number and asked me to call, it was the correct area code for the town in which she claimed to live, oh shit what was I getting into.

The following afternoon I wrote the number on a post it and plucked up the courage to call her, it must be a con, one of those premium rate chat lines. On about the third ring she picked up a small, smoky, sexy voice with a West Country accent who after basic introductions started to describe in graphic detail her likes and dislikes the former were too numerous to mention the latter severe bondage and sex with other women. My erection was rampant I was oblivious to anything that was happening in the office outside my door, she asked what I would like to do to her, bend her over my desk play with her till she was very wet slowly using her cunt then move on to her ass parting her big fat cheeks before entering her back passage and fucking her roughly. Then withdrawing and letting her clean every inch of my rapidly shrinking cock.

"Well I am free three weeks Friday in the afternoon but I have to be back by 4.30 to cook the old mans dinner" she said as though I had asked when she would next be out shopping, she then went into considerable detail about how all her holes would be available on any properly arranged meeting. I was dumbstruck yet incredibly excited I had just arranged a rendezvous with a fat ugly slut old enough to be my mother but was more aroused than I had been in years.

Over the intervening weeks I wrestled with my conscience what on earth was I doing I have a beautiful wife, a great family, a varied and exciting sex life, several times each day I vowed to mail her and cancel but somehow I never got around to it, usually my resolve weakened around lunchtime after I had seen the latest pictures. The agreed date arrived, as I have my own business it was not difficult to create an excuse that would free up the afternoon, my sat nav directed me to a cul de sac I pulled into a parking bay at the end and called her. Less than five minutes later an old lady waddled down an alleyway barely recognisable as the wanton slut I had viewed in hundreds of pornographic pictures.

She looked older, fatter and in her cheap chain store clothes rougher than I had visualised. She leaned over touched my thigh and we started making small talk, her rounded vowels brought me back to the dirty slut I had talked to several times and as we drove I started to see her more as the hyper active sex object featured in her photos and less as a tired middle aged woman. At her suggestion we headed to a small forest near the motorway about fifteen minutes drive a beautiful place with lots of back roads and stopping places where people go for walks or to exercise their dogs. She knew a spot that was quiet with a large flat log that had featured in many of her photos, we drove off the track and parked behind a small copse.

Her smile appeared slightly crooked as I leaned across and stroked a very large thigh, I reached the crease at the top of her leg and felt the overhang of her belly there were no knickers concealed in her flesh.

"I thought you might be impatient and I like to feel fresh air between my legs" she explained

Her pubic area was like Velcro where she had shaved badly and not within the past day, I felt into her cunt that to my amazement was already damp. Slowly my fingers played with her lips digit by digit entered her with four fingers buried to the knuckle she pushed forward against my palm. After a minute or two she withdrew my arm and gently sucked her pungent juices off each finger in a manner that had come straight from a seventies German porn film, God I loved it. My cock was bulging against my zipper so hard that it hurt.

Once my hand was clean she leant over and undid my flies, my penis sprang out and vibrated like a springboard after the diver had departed. She kissed the head her tongue working into the eye then sucked the shaft of my prick deep into her throat, it felt so good.

Reclining in my car seat I looked down on what was being done to me with an air of detachment, it was surreal to watch this old granny`s head bobbing up and down in my lap. The feelings in my groin encouraged me back into participation I grabbed her solid permed hair with its grey roots and restricted her movement to the top third of my cock pulling back slightly so her teeth ran tantalisingly along my length. It was not what I had intended but who cares I held her head still and started to fuck her mouth she swallowed me expertly without a murmur of objection within minutes I was pumping cum down her throat as she sucked greedily on my rapidly shrinking penis. Not a single drop fell on the leather seat and my cock was spotless.

Slowly regaining my composure I looked across the car she was beaming her smudged lipstick formed a bright red gash through her round face, she leaned over and kissed me, her salty tongue probing deep into my mouth my cock stirred involuntarily.

I suggested we get out for a walk it was an overcast autumnal afternoon but not too cold and I wanted to see the log on which I had seen her photographed in many poses. It lay four hundred yards further into the woods well hidden from the road, with a bridal path at the rear shielded by some brambles. As we walked I made small talk about the weather and the views interspersed with the occasional lewd suggestion, she gently smoothed my cock and grinned. As we approached our destination she turned, tilted her head up and invited my mouth onto hers, our tongues entwined probing each others teeth like teenagers. I groped her massive tits outside her blouse then undid a few buttons and played with her hard nipple, she reached inside her shirt and pulled the bra down freeing both pendulous bosoms then went back to massaging my dick.

I looked down at her and was surprised at the paleness of her nipples they were large but only slightly darker than the vast expanse of lily-white tit. I turned and sat on the flattened log pulling her toward me, I took the right breast in two hands massaging the nipple between thumb and forefinger, it was now level with my mouth gently at first I licked then sucked hard on her elongated bud. My teeth grated on her flesh and goose bumps rose on her chest, my right hand moved out of her shirt and up her skirt she shuffled her legs apart giving me easy access to her knickerless fanny. My hand caressed her pitted thigh then fingers slid into her dripping cunt, as I bit down on her nipple she rubbed hard against my hand.

This continued for an age me biting and sucking on her ample tits while she ground her cunt onto my hand gyrating her hips in a small circles, her eyes closed and her breath came in shorts gasps, this vastly experienced slut was cuming on my hand. She bent her knees and pushed all her weight forward trapping my hand against my leg but still deep inside her then she pulled my face tight into her chest almost suffocating me and gave a long trembling sigh.

I moved her over and she rested with one hand on the log by my side, her leg still across mine and my hand gripping her pubic mound three fingers slithering around her clit. With my left hand I gently removed her tit from my face then started to explore her arse cheeks, parting them my thumb found her hole drawing some moisture from the lips of her cunt I gently lubricated the entrance to her back passage before pressing my thumb deep into her. She quickly relaxed and pressed back pushing me further up her arse and then again started to gently gyrate on my hands.

By this stage I was bursting I desperately needed to fuck her sensing this she pulled my hands out of her and again licked off her own juices lingering on the thumb that had so recently been three inches deep in her bum. She stood upright moved over then leant forward resting her forearms on the smooth, damp wood, I stood and watched as she pulled her skirt up over her bum then spread her legs and asked which hole I wanted first.

The lips around her cunt were swollen and puckered glistening with moisture from the earlier exertions, my cock was rigid poking out of my trousers, strange but I could not remember her getting it out. I undid and dropped my pants moved behind and slid my cock from the back of her cunt to the top of her arse. I gently squeezed her cheeks together sandwiching my penis in the soft flesh, the head of my cock probed her arsehole pushing in half an inch rested then withdrew. I moved down and dipped into her cunt, again just half an inch my intention had been to continue this teasing for some time but when I felt her warm, wet and surprisingly tight around my cock all self control evaporated and I slammed everything I had into her holding her hips my cock pounded against her yielding flesh an even pace became established she pushed back against me on the up stroke ensuring the maximum penetration. I tried to concentrate on the trees, on some red blemishes on her arse anything to prolong the act, but it was little use after a couple more strokes I felt her judder and tense this was enough to bring me off, streams of spunk shot into her the next few strokes brought more then I was spent and leant forward resting on her back my cock still inside with streams of fluid running down my balls and thigh.

Eventually I withdrew and sat back down on the log she lifted her skirt and plonked her naked arse next me her huge breasts still hung loosely outside her blouse, my trousers and boxers dangled around my ankles we must have looked ludicrous. She looked across and smiled, we drew breadth and admired the countryside after about fifteen minutes she asked if we were finished and should she dress or was I going to fuck her arse as requested prior to the meet. I had to explain that this was one treat that would have to wait until we had a hotel room and a little more time.

When we eventually got to fix up the next meeting it would not be for eight weeks but then things got really dirty...