How Young You Feel Matters

I was remembering how it was before. I'd have been sitting there, just like I'd sat every night for the last six years, sitting at my desk and staring at the screen of my laptop. The woman on the screen would have been an older woman, maybe about fifty, and she had really heavy breasts. If she hadn't been pinching and pulling on her thick nipples, her big breasts would have been flopping around all over the place.

I was imagining being the guy laying under her and looking up and seeing her do that. I was also imagining my hand was the woman's pussy, but that was harder to do. She had big, puffy, thick pussy lips and they sort of wrapped themselves around the guy's cock when she lifted her ass up. When she was up all the way, his cock glistened with her juices and here and there was a little blob of white stuff that she'd left on his shaft.

I'd move my hand down at the same time she pushed her pussy down over the guy's cock again. I could tell she was about ready to cum because like always happens in porn films, she pushed down hard and gasped, "Oh fuck, I'm gonna cum." I imagined her dripping pussy starting to squeeze my cock, so I squeezed mine a little.

She raised back up then, and there was a ring of that white stuff around the guy's cock. She moved up and down a little, right at the top of her stroke, and then screeched, "Oh God, fuck me hard". The guy started ramming his cock in her and bouncing her soft ass cheeks. The woman screeched again and then started rocking her hips really fast. She panted "Hah-ah-hah-ah-hah-ah" and then her legs started to shake. The guy groaned, rammed his cock deep, and his legs twitched three times.

At the same time, I groaned and started jerking my hips. I caught my cum in a tissue and then let my cock go. It was too sensitive to keep stroking it like the woman did to the man. She kept moving up and down and pulling her nipples and moaning.

Finally, she raised up enough the guy's cock slipped out, and a second after that, this blob of his cum dripped from the still gaping opening and fell down on his cock. The woman pulled her pussy in, then pushed it out and another blob came out.

I tapped the "esc" key to close the full screen view and then clicked the "X" in the top right corner to shut off the site. A year before, I'd have looked for another video like this one, but I was trying to limit myself to cumming just once every night. It seemed like the first time was always better than the second, and I'd been staying up way too long to get the second. My supervisor had asked if I was OK one day. He said it looked like I was tired for some reason.

Well, I was tired. I'd been getting about five hours of sleep a night instead of the eight all the books said I needed. Now, I was getting seven, and that seemed to be working out well. What wasn't working out well was the reason I was sitting at my desk and jacking off every night.

I was one of those guys almost all the girls in high school and college wouldn't give a second look. It wasn't my fault I was only five-four, and it wasn't my fault I only weighed about one twenty-five. It wasn't my fault I had to wear thick glasses to see anything more than a foot away either.

I was a nerd, and nerds didn't get the girl. Football players who could barely add two and two did, but it would have been insane for me to even try out for football. Basketball players who were skinny like I was got all the girls they wanted, but they were all close to six feet tall. There's no way I could have ever gotten a shot off.

Even the two guys in my high school class who had long, dirty hair, wore ripped jeans and heavy boots instead of loafers and rode motorcycles to school had girfriends. I was smart, always wore my hair short, and didn't play any sports. Most of the girls in high school were taller than I was if they wore heels, and I didn't have any biceps for them to feel or chest muscles that stuck out from a tight T-shirt.

College was different, but only because there were more guys taller than me and with more muscles than there'd been in high school. Oh, there were a few girls who did look at me. They were nothing to write home about, but they did look. I figured they looked because they were so flat-chested and plain they couldn't buy a date and thought I might be better than nothing. I thought about trying to get close to a couple, but there was just something wrong with a girl who didn't seem to take care of herself very well or who didn't have a figure to speak of.

They seemed like nice girls in most other respects, but they weren't girls I wanted to do anything with. I know, like the old saw says, "beggars can't be choosers", but when I imagined having one in bed, it didn't do anything for me.

There were a couple of girls I really did like, but they weren't really girls anymore either. The first was one of the cooks in the college dorm kitchen when I was a sophomore. Her name was Liz, and she had dark brown hair with streaks of silver in it. Her body wasn't slim and firm like a girl. She was round and soft looking, and her uniforms fit really tight around her big breasts.

Of course, I never said anything to her about liking her. Liz was at least as old as my mother and I figured if I had, she'd have laughed at me and then told everybody else. I did think about her though. Every night after dinner, I'd go to the john, close the door on the stall and imagine what she looked like under her uniform.

The second was a woman who lived in the same apartment building as I when I was a senior. The way the apartments were built, each one had a tiny balcony outside at the back with a wrought iron railing. Each balcony was big enough for a chaise lounge and a chair, and Janet's was below mine and one apartment over, so all I had to do was look down and to the right and I could see her when she sunbathed.

Janet, like Liz, was old enough I should probably have been ashamed of myself for watching her, but I thought she was beautiful and sexy. She had really long, jet black hair and a pretty face, but that wasn't all. Janet had big boobs, or at least they looked big in the bikini she always wore out on her little balcony, and her hips were round and wide.

I never saw Janet except when she was out on her balcony. We lived on different floors and evidently had different schedules because she was never home at night. The only reason I knew her name was Janet Callione was I knew her apartment number was one floor down and next to mine, and her name was on that mailbox at the entrance.

Janet was the woman I thought about most of the time when I was on my back on my bed and stroking my cock every night. In my mind, she'd take off her bikini top and bottoms, look up at me and smile, then wave for me to come down to her apartment. Once we were in her bed, she'd stroke my cock until I was going crazy and then look at me with her dark eyes and say, "I need to cum, Jeff. Fuck me and make me cum."

She'd spread her legs then and open the big pussy lips hiding in the mass of black pubic hair. I'd sink my cock inside her and she'd moan. We always came at the same time.

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I graduated with a degree in electrical engineering, found a job, and worked for that company for two years before deciding I needed a change. That change was a better position with a different company in Nashville, Tennessee. I thought about another apartment, but I was tired of living around so many people. After a lot of looking, I rented one half of a duplex at the edge of town and about ten miles from where I worked.

The duplex was a little odd in that it had been the farmhouse on a farm before the suburbs got out that far. The owner was the farmer's wife, Mary Leitz. When he'd passed on, she didn't want to hire someone to keep the farm running, so she sold it to a developer who subdivided the five hundred acres and started building houses. She did keep the big farm lot though, so the house sat in the middle of about six acres and had a garage and barn in the back.

She'd then converted the farmhouse into a duplex because she didn't need such a big house and by renting half of it, she had enough income in addition to what she made as a secretary at the county courthouse she didn't have to touch the proceeds from selling the farm. That money was for when she retired, she said.

I liked Mary from the time she showed me around what would be my half of the house. She seemed to be pretty young to be a widow. Judging by the way my mother's face looked, I figured Mary for about fifty, but she was in a lot better shape than my mother. Mary was wearing snug jeans that day, and while her ass was wider than a young girl's ass, her legs looked long and slender for a woman so short. Mary was a couple inches shorter than I, so maybe I was seeing what I wanted to see instead of what was really there. I wasn't sure at the time.

I didn't have to wonder if her breasts were there or not. Mary was wearing a T-shirt, what I discovered she usually wore at night and on the weekends, and it must have been hard for her to find clothes. That T-shirt fit just fine over her softly rounded shoulders, but from there on down, it fit like a second skin. I figured her bra was one like my mom wore, one of those that's made of thin foam and tends to smooth everything out. Even though it did that, her breasts still looked really big.

I liked the place and Mary seemed to like me, so I paid her the first and last months rent and moved my stuff in that weekend.

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When Mary divided the house, she left her side with the original living room in the front and the kitchen and bath in the back. The stair to the second story was in that living room and upstairs there were four more rooms. She made what had been the dining room into my living room with a second stair, and the downstairs bedroom became my kitchen and bath. Upstairs, she'd used one bedroom as a place for my stair to end and put in a second, upstairs bathroom. The other room was my bedroom. I didn't know how she did her side, but I figured it was about the same.

One Tuesday night a week after I moved in, I was laying in bed after my nightly jacking-off session and thinking about a project I was working on at the office when I heard sounds coming through the wall beside my bed. There wasn't much of a question about what those sounds were.

They weren't very loud sounds, but the occasional gasps and then later the panting breaths I was hearing could only mean Mary was making herself cum. A few minutes later, I heard a tiny little cry, the creak of bedsprings, and then a sigh. Everything got quiet after that.

I'd found the location of the sounds by then. They were coming from a wall receptacle and that could only mean one thing. When the electrician originally wired the house, he'd put one receptacle on the wall of what was now my bedroom and then put a receptacle on the other side of the wall to save wire. Since I was hearing Mary, that meant her bedroom was on the other side of the wall from mine.

I'd also forgotten all about my project at work. Instead, I was thinking about how Mary must have looked. Was she lying on her back with her legs spread wide and one or two, maybe even three fingers in her pussy? Maybe she was on her stomach instead. I'd seen women do it that way in some of the videos I'd watched.

I wondered if she was wearing anything, like maybe pajamas, or if she was naked. If she was naked, was she stroking her big breasts at the same time, or maybe pinching her nipples? I didn't know who Jerry was, but right before it sounded like she was cumming, I'd heard her say, "Oh Jerry, don't stop." I figured Jerry had been her husband, but he might have been some guy she liked at work too.

My mind went back to the vision of Mary on her back with one hand on her pussy and the other on her breasts and nipples. It almost felt like my hand was her pussy if I stroked it right, or at least what I thought her pussy would feel like. When she started to pant in my fantasy, I started humping up into my hand, and I shot cum all over my chest when she made that little cry. I had to get up, wash the cum off my chest, and change my underwear.

The next night, I didn't look up any porn sites. Instead, I waited until I heard Mary come into her bedroom and then sat down by that receptacle. I didn't hear much for a while, but then I heard the bedsprings creak when she sat down. They creaked again and I figured she was lying down then.

That night ended the same for both of us. Down by that receptacle I could hear more of what Mary was doing, and one of the things I heard was little wet sounds. In my imagination, I saw her with a finger sliding in and out of her wet pussy. I felt my cock start to twitch with each stroke of my hand then.

A while later, I was trying not to cum before Mary did. She was doing the same panting and mewing as the night before, and my imagination was running rampant with the vision of what she must be doing. I was doing pretty well at holding back until Mary gasped, "Oh now, Jerry, now."

I was prepared this time and caught my cum in a tissue, then just listened to her little cries and the creak of the bedsprings as Mary came. I was still thinking about her when I climbed into bed, but I didn't start stroking my cock again. That one time was better than any with my porn site videos.

Every night for the rest of that week, I'd wait until about ten and then lay down on the floor by that receptacle, and every night I'd hear Mary getting herself off. It was always the same. She'd get into bed and a little later I'd start to hear little moans. The moans would get louder and louder until she was panting. At the end, I'd always hear her say something about the guy, Jerry, like "Oh, Jerry, make me do it", or "Faster, Jerry, I'm almost there".

I'd developed a vision of her in my head, and I'd close my eyes, see that vision, and jack off so we came at about the same time. In my vision, Mary would be lying under me, her big breasts rolling around as I stroked my cock in and out of her pussy. At the end, she'd start to shake a little and wrap her arms around me. I'd cum inside her because of that shaking and the way she cried out. Afterwards, she'd pull me down on top of her heavy breasts and stroke my back for a while.

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Since Mary went to work later than I did and she came home earlier, we didn't see each other that first week. I was busy getting the duplex furnished with more than the beanbag chair, TV, a cheap computer desk, and the twin bed I owned. That was all I needed for my little apartment. I wasn't sure I needed more now, but the duplex looked bare with just that furniture. After buying a couch, a couple of chairs, and a coffee table that Friday night, I arranged to have them delivered on Saturday when I'd be home.

Mary was just finishing mowing the front yard when the truck from the furniture store pulled up. She drove up to the house, got off the small tractor, and walked up onto the porch. Her T-shirt fit just as tight as the one she'd worn the day she showed me around the duplex, but that day, she had on shorts instead of jeans.

I'd been right about her legs. They were slender and they looked really smooth and soft. I'd have been staring at her because of that anyway, but it was the satin softness of her inner thighs that made me keep looking. I'd imagined feeling those soft thighs against my waist, and now that I saw part of them, I decided they'd feel a whole lot better than they had in my imagination.

Her shorts were pretty short, so I saw a lot of those thighs, enough that combined with the vision I'd been having every night, my cock started to stiffen. It wasn't a lot, but I could feel it starting to push against the leg of my jeans. I was holding the door to my half of the duplex open so the furniture guys could carry the sofa into my living room, and it would have gone back down if Mary hadn't walked up beside me, but she did.

"Hi, Jeff. Got a new couch I see."

I stepped around the door a little further because I didn't want Mary to see the way my cock was swelling. It was getting serious now, because when Mary got that close, I could see how her breasts sort of pushed out over the top of her bra cups.

"Yeah, I didn't have much furniture when I was in school and then in an apartment, so I bought a couch, chair, and coffee table."

She smiled.

"Well, a student doesn't need much more than a table...and a bed of course."

I looked at her face then because of the way she'd paused before saying I'd need a bed. She was still smiling like before, so I decided she was just making conversation. She chuckled then.

"I suppose you'll use your couch like Jerry used ours. He always took a nap on Sunday afternoon on our couch."

When she laughed, her big breasts had jiggled like I'd seen in the porn I'd watched before, that soft little jiggle that tells you they're real and not just bags of silicone. I knew I was staring at them, and also knew I had to say something or Mary would notice. I pulled my eyes back to her face, and said the first thing I could think of.

"Yeah, you're probably right about that. Couches are good for naps."

She grinned then.

"Couches are good for other things too. I'll bet you'll be sitting on your new couch with a girl or two, won't you? It's OK. I know a young guy like you will bring girls here. That's why there's nothing about girls in my rental contract. I'm not much for wild parties, so that is, but I know I can't expect you to live here like some monk in a cave.

"Well, I need to get the back mowed now, so I better get going. I like your couch and chair. They'll fit in the room just fine."

Mary turned around and walked off toward her tractor then, and I watched her wide hips sway from side to side as she did. Her shorts fit tight enough they'd pulled up between her ass cheeks a little and that just made her walk that much more erotic.

When the furniture guys had unloaded my stuff and left, I went back to my kitchen. There's a window over the sink, and when I went to get a glass of water, I looked out that window.

Mary was still mowing and she was getting close to the house. I stepped back a little when she went by so she wouldn't see me. I mean, I really didn't know her but I was pretty sure she'd noticed me staring at her breasts before. Most women wouldn't have liked that, or at least that's what I'd read.

When Mary went by, her tractor bounced over some bump in the yard. When that happened, Mary's breasts bounced too. It must have moved them around in her bra as well, because she reached through the neck of her T-shirt and did something with her bra straps. I know it was her bra straps because her breasts moved up and down.

It felt kind of weird, you know, how I was staring at Mary and getting a stiff cock again. Mary had to be older than my mother, but she sure didn't look it. Even though her face looked really mature, her body looked so inviting.

Yeah, I know what you're thinking. You're thinking since I'd never had sex with a woman, any woman with breasts and a pussy would have done the same thing to me, but you'd be wrong. I worked with several women, and none of them did to me what Mary did.

Julie had breasts and she knew they were pretty fantastic. She wore her blouses unbuttoned down far enough you could see cleavage and she went to great lengths to make sure that cleavage showed. Melanie had a really nice ass, and she always wore pants that showed her round curves to her advantage. Melanie had breasts too, but they looked pretty small to me. Lisa had both, but Lisa usually looked bored when I talked to her. She didn't look bored with Randall, but then Randall was about six feet tall and had really broad shoulders.

No, none of the women at my work did anything for me. They were just people I worked with. Mary was different. I don't think she wore T-shirts that fit tight in order to attract attention to her breasts, and I don't think her shorts that day were so I'd look at her legs. I think she was just being comfortable like a lot of women do and all the erotic thoughts I was having was because I was reading something that wasn't really there. That's what I told myself anyway.