I sometimes think that the most unexpected thing in life is the unexpected. I mean, when your life has gone along uneventfully for many years you don’t expect to suddenly find yourself faced with a whole new situation.
For those interested, my name is Arianrhod, the name choice of Welsh parents who probably had no idea what my fellow students at school would do with that name. “Ari” “Aria” “Ria” “Anrod” “Rod” are just some of the more polite samples. Coming as we did to a country where “Sharon” “Norma,” or “Margaret” were the sort of names in vogue, “Arianrhod” was considered both exotic and laughable.
But Arianrhod I am, and Arianrhod I shall be, unless the person addressing me has opted for an early demise.
I am forty three, married for twenty three years to Bruce, which, by the way, is a safe name in this country, and producer with his assistance of two offspring who were safely named Lisa and Ian.
Lisa, aged twenty two flew from the coop nearly two years ago seeking her fortune in the great metropolis. Ian aged twenty is still with us, and whilst Bruce often wishes him a great distance off, I confess that I enjoy his youthful virility.
Those of you who have suffered under the yoke of a grown up son and his mates will understand what I’m talking about. They make free with our garage, from which emanates hroom hroom noises as they do things with cars.
They also make free with the refrigerator and the family room, but I must add that they do bring a bit of a sparkle into the household. It’s not only that, though. The presence of three robust and potent young men around the place seems to carry with it a hint of danger.
A bit more about me; I suppose I look fairly much like a lot of suburban housewives, neither startlingly good looking nor unbearably ugly. I am, as already indicated, of Welsh extraction and have the dark hair and short stature that characterises some Welsh people.
From what I can gather my marriage is about the same as lots of others around us, conventional. There’s nothing especially to excite or disturb one, unless it is such things as the children getting chickenpox, Bruce coming home from work with the flue or the annual bazaar held by our church as fund raiser.
What had once added some spice to my marriage had long since become a Friday night bed time ritual, that is, if Bruce is not too tired from his exertions at the office.
Sounds all very pedestrian doesn’t it? Yet that is how life appears to be for lots of people, and many of them seem to want it that way. Me? Well, I sometimes fantasise being swept away by some gorgeous heroic type and carried off to a desert island where we’d make love ten times a day, but if it did happen I think I’d worry about how Bruce was managing alone.
As I’ve said, you don’t expect the unexpected, but sometimes the unexpected happens. It wasn’t exactly a gorgeous hero sweeping me off to an island, but it was a very pleasant surprise when it happened.
The Easter long weekend was approaching and the routine had been for many years that Bruce cleared off with a couple of his mates and went fishing somewhere along the coast leaving me on my own. When the kids were younger it wasn’t too bad. They had been fun company so I didn’t feel left out of anything. Now, with Lisa gone and Ian and Co. off all over the place, I was anticipating a dull weekend.
My hero turned out to be a trinity of heroes, Ian, David and Brent. It wasn’t exactly an island they swept me off to, but I suppose it was the next best thing.
With utmost caution they approached me, not at all like dashing conquerors, but with more than just a touch of the fawning in their manner. Son Ian was their spokesman.
“Mum, were gong off camping up the river over Easter weekend and we wondered if you’d like to come with us?”
“Hello,” I thought, “there’s a catch in this somewhere, be careful Arianrhod.” The boys had gone off camping before and usually found some girls to go with them.
“Why?” I asked briskly.
“We just thought you’d like to,” Ian replied. “Dad will be away and you’ll be on your own. You’d enjoy it, swimming and going for walks, and we’ll do some fishing.”
“What about the girls you usually take with you?” I asked suspiciously.
“We thought we’d give them a miss this time. I mean, it’s about time you had a bit of a break.”
I was still waiting for the rest of it so I asked bluntly, “And what else would I get?”
“Well…we er…er wondered if you wouldn’t mind doing a bit of cooking.” Ah, so that was it. For some reason the girls couldn’t go with them and it was they who usually did the food buying and cooking.
“So you want someone to wait on you while you enjoy yourselves,” I said.
“No mum, just a bit of cooking. We’d keep the place tidy and all that.”
“Please Mrs. Meldrum,” pleaded David, “We’ll buy all the food and the meals are always very simple.”
I suppose I was a bit flattered that they’d asked me; after all, having a middle aged woman around wouldn’t normally be considered fun by their generation. In addition, it would be nice to get away.
“It’s a beautiful spot we’re going to,” chipped in Brent.
Earlier in our married life Bruce, me and the kids went camping quite frequently. It would be good to get away again; even do a bit of swimming that I hadn’t done for a long time. I began to yield.
“All right,” I said guardedly, “just so long as you don’t expect elaborate meals and you do the buying and paying. I expect a free trip.”
The looks of delight had just begun to spread across their handsome faces when another thought struck me.
“What are you going camping with?” They had always used the old tent Bruce and I bought years ago. It was a type that could be seen everywhere in those days; it was a square tent about four metres by four metres with a flap that lifted up to form a sort of covered area in front of the tent.
“Just the old tent,” said Ian, innocently.
“Me sleeping in the tent with three young hunks,” I thought, panic rising.
“Am I supposed to sleep with you three?”
“Er, yes. We can put a screen up if you wish.”
Living in a tent can mean one is a bit exposed, if you see what I mean. Perhaps if I still had the sylphlike figure of a young girl it wouldn’t have been so bad; I mean I’d have something to show off. Of course, such a young lady might expect some interesting consequences as a result of her display, but that seemed to be the main objective among young mixed gender campers.
“All right,” I said again, “Just so long as you don’t look at me when I’m getting undressed.”
They all laughed I thought somewhat nervously.
Bruce also laughed when I told him what I would be doing over Easter. “Reckon you’ll come back with your virginity in tact,” he chortled.
I thought that was a bit coarse, and told him so.