I had a great time on the Feast Day of Saint Wite but unfortunately so did Harry. I was conflicted. He didn't tell me that he had joined the Wheaters. I couldn't prove it, but I suspected that he had revealed the secret of my issues with coffee. But I felt marvellous.
In the end I decided to hang loose but to carry on keeping his tackle under lock and key. Everything in the pub returned to something approaching normal.
One evening I made my usual entrance into the bar, smiled and looked around. Most of the usual suspects were there. Sitting with Ted was a woman. She was quite a bit younger than him, but slightly older than me, with blonde hair much of which showed the start of turning grey. Her face was sun tanned and had the apple round shape that you often find in these parts.
While it's not unheard of to have a woman in my pub but it was very unusual. It's not something I encourage. When Ted saw me he smiled broadly and gestured for me to join them.
"This is my wife, Volet," said Ted proudly.
"Vi", the woman said in an accent not quite Dorset and not quite Australian as she reached out to shake my hand.
"You got married again, Ted?" I asked.
"No, this is my wife who went to Australia."
I stopped myself saying any of the first ten thoughts that went through my head.
"Ted has spoken about you but I never thought that I'd meet you," I said.
"What brings you back here after all this time?"
"There's no need to be polite, dear. I know what you must think.
"I needed to see Ted and the farm again but mostly I wanted to talk with you, dear."
"Me, I can't think why."
"I wanted to tell you a lot of things that Ted never could or never would.
"I have no right to ask but do you think that we could speak privately?"
I don't know why but I felt like I knew her from somewhere and that I liked her.
"Shall we go upstairs? I'm sure that my husband, Harry, can manage without me for a while."
When we were seated in my lounge, I asked if she would care for a drink. She said that she would take a dry sherry, if I had one. I remember thinking how old fashioned it sounded.
She started to recount her story.
"Although Ted and I have been separated for a long time now we have always kept in touch. I really hope that you don't mind but Ted told me that you and I are the only two women alive who know the secrets of Yew Tree Farm. The deeper secrets, I mean. If I may, I would like to share some of my history."
I was intrigued but I said, "Only if you'd like to."
Violet started her story.
"Whitchurch Canonicorum is where I was born. At birth I was given the name of Candida, which is the latinised name of Saint Wite, but I preferred to be called Violet.
"When I married Ted I took to the way of life at the farm straight away. I'd always been a physical girl, if you know what I mean, and I really enjoyed the ceremonies. It made me feel it was perfectly proper and normal to be had by lots of men. There was never any feeling of guilt. I just felt a connection with all the women who had ridden The Hoss before.
"As the years went by it was obvious that I was never going to have children. If one man didn't get you pregnant that was one thing but if six men were having a go on a regular basis that was another. I didn't mind, it meant that I could just carry on regardless."
I butted in, "Before that, what happened when the farmer's wife got pregnant?"
Vi chuckled and said, "In the book there is a list of Wise Women in the district. They always knew couples who had tried for babies without success. Wives would just appear in disguise. I'm sure that their husbands thought that they were being given some sort of magic potion and, in some ways I guess, they were. Ted's mother told me that the 'Wise Woman' herself would temporarily step in if she didn't have anyone else. Very noble, she thought."
She went on, "Gradually, the farm changed. It wasn't anyone's fault, Ted did all he could to resist. His mother died which didn't help. Farming became more mechanised. Slowly the number of farmhands was reduced and eventually we had to let the last four go.
"I felt as if my world had ended. Ted tried, but I don't believe that one man can approach The Hoss successfully. God knows he did his best every night. I enjoyed it but I was always left feeling disappointed. We both knew that the other one wasn't happy but we tried to keep it to ourselves.
"Then Ted started to scour the local towns and villages at night. Sometimes he would return with one or two men that he had persuaded to fuck his wife. Often he would come home battered and bruised when he had approached the wrong man. I know I sound ungrateful, but it just wasn't regular enough for me.
"One morning things changed. Two Australian backpackers stumbled across the farm. They were hiking around England picking up employment where they could. They wanted to know if Ted had any work for them.
"For ten days they would do tasks around the farm, I would prepare meals for them and, at night, all three of them would strap me to The Hoss.
"They raved about my cooking and my fanny but eventually they talked about moving on. I guess they knew how devastated I was.
"Then one of them had an idea. He said that last year they had been making their way around Oz. They had worked on a cattle station for a while. The guys there had taken it in turn to do the cooking and it was always rank. The bloke that owned the place wanted to get a proper cook in but could never find anyone.
"He thought that both of us could get a job there. Before they left they gave Ted the address.
