This story had elements of two of my favorite things- softball and jiu-jitsu. If you've ever spent much time at the ballpark for travel ball or rec ball, some of this will be familiar to you. Be warned that some of the characters in this fictional story use racial epithets. If you don't like violence or interracial sex, do us both a favor and quit while you're ahead.
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Ray Washington was sweating. Behind the plate for his third game of the day in the blistering Florida sun, Ray was anxious for the game to be over. The home team was up five runs, and the visitors hadn't been able to touch their pitcher all game.
Having travelled up from Port St. Lucie to Lakewood Park in Fort Pierce, Ray was spending yet another weekend away from home trying to make some extra bucks. Ray's primary job working as a warehouse manager paid well, but his recent divorce had set him way back. Being able to pick up and extra $250 for working a day and a half over the weekend helped him make ends meet.
Besides the money, Ray enjoyed the kids. While he umped baseball sometimes, softball is what Ray really loved. He was doing a 12U tournament with sixteen teams this week, and they'd moved from pool games to bracket play earlier in the afternoon. A typical double-elimination tournament; by noon on Sunday there'd only be four teams left. With four fields and only two age groups, the games went by quickly.
As the half-inning cycled, Ray went to the backstop to drink some more water. He checked the game clock- only eighteen minutes left. The umpires did a home/field/off rotation, but as it was late in the day and the tournament organizers wanted all the teams back to the park in the morning to pad their gate receipts, this was Ray's last game of the day.
While Ray loved the kids, he hated the parents. Loud, self-centered, and ignorant as to the rules of the game, parents made Ray's life a living hell at times. And this game was one of them.
The visiting Lady Raiders were an average team at best. Average players, average coaching. They had won one game early in the day against the weakest team in the tournament, but had lost two games since then. Ray had been a factor in the second loss, as he'd waved off a play at first that would have ended the inning for the Lady Raiders when their first baseman pulled her foot off the bag stretching for an errant throw on a squeeze bunt. Ray's safe call allowed what was the winning run to score from third and ended the game.
The mother of the first baseman was a loud, caustic woman who wouldn't leave it alone all game. She argued balls and strikes constantly, leaving Ray's partner Ed ready to climb the fence and open a gallon can of whoop ass on her. When Ray made the game ending call, this mom called him a blind asshole who shouldn't be allowed on the field. She had a gravelly, deep voice and didn't hesitate to let her opinions be known.
As Ray and Ed left the field for the earlier game, the mom ran up to them and told them they should be ashamed of themselves to do that to her girls. Some of the other parents on the team looked on sympathetically, as the few that actually paid attention to the game knew Ray'd made the right call.
As bad luck would have it, Ray and Ed drew the Lady Raiders for their first pool game in the afternoon closer. The loud woman from earlier in the day set her folding chair up behind the plate, and was on Ray's ass for the whole game.
The woman had a hand-painted t-shirt that said, "Larissa" over her heart, and the back said," #10 Audrey Lady Raiders" in support of her daughter. Larissa had cut the sleeves off the t-shirt, and hemmed the bottom up so it would show the piercing in her naval and the top of her tribal tramp stamp. She had large hoop earrings, a deep tan, and stepped away between innings to smoke her Marlboros. Ray had been around the park long enough to know that she wasn't well liked by the other team parents, as she sat by herself while the other parent clustered together in groups. Her daughter Audrey was a big girl who could pound anything up in the zone, but was slow and couldn't touch a down and away pitch.
With one out, Audrey came up to bat. The first pitch came right down the center of the plate at knee height. "Steee Rike!" Ray called.
"C'mon Blue, that's terrible!" Larissa was at it again. The second pitch was way high, and Audrey let it go. "You sure that wasn't a strike too, Blue?" Audrey hammered the next pitch foul down the third base line. The girl had power, but was strictly a pull hitter. With a 2-1 count, the home team's coach wisely called a waste pitch, and she delivered. A foot outside. "Good eye, Audrey, you got this babe!"
They stayed outside on the next pitch, and Audrey hit it off the end of her bat towards first base. The young lady on first charged hard to catch it, but only barely got her glove on the ball a step in foul territory. The ball bounced off her glove and rolled out towards the pitcher, who picked the ball up. Audrey raced to first base, and Ray called "Foul Ball."
Larissa erupted, yelling "What do you mean foul ball? The pitcher has the ball, how the hell can it be foul? You're TERRIBLE blue, just TERRIBLE!" Her large breasts heaved as she yelled at Ray. He thought to himself, "Jesus Christ, get a clue lady," and stepped back behind the plate.
Veins stood out in her neck as she continued her tirade. "No wonder we're losing! How much did they pay you!" Ray had enough. He took his mask off, turned to the woman, and said, "It was a foul ball. She touched it in foul territory." He glared at her, but couldn't help but notice the camel toe on her short shorts.
Ray turned back around, and waved the pitcher on. The next pitch bounced in the dirt. "Way to battle Aud," yelled Larissa from behind the plate. Ray thought, "Battle? If she swung at that shit she deserves to sit down."
The 3-2 pitch was low, and Audrey was on top of it. The ball hit the plate, rolled forwards, and the catcher made a nice play and threw her out at first. "You stupid sonvabitch, the ball hit the plate, it's a foul ball!" Larissa screamed as she held the chain link fence behind home plate. Ray noticed that she wore a thumb ring on her left hand, and had little fake gemstones on her fingernails from her manicure. While she had rings on seven of her ten digits, her left ring finger was empty.
"Big fuckin' surprise," Ray thought to himself. Both teams went down peacefully from there on, and Ray was relieved to call "BALLGAME" when the last Lady Raiders batter popped out to third base.
"It would've been a ballgame if you weren't blind, Blue." Larissa got in one parting shot as Ray walked off the field for the end of a hard day.
He thought to himself, "No wonder that bitch isn't married with the mouth on her." He looked over at Larissa. She pulled another Marlboro out of her pack, lit it and took a deep drag. "Nice game Lady Raiders!!!" she yelled.
Ed asked Ray if he wanted to get something to eat. "Nah, I just want to take a shower buddy. I'll see you in the morning." One thing Ray liked about calling games in this area was they weren't cheap. The tournament organizers gave the umps their own rooms. Ray took the long walk to his car, and headed to the motel.
After he'd showered and watched some ESPN, Ray played with his cell phone. "Fuck, I left my charger in the car again." Ray put on his shorts and a t-shirt, and headed out to his car to retrieve his charger.
As he walked outside of his room, Ray heard a commotion in the parking lot. "Just get the fuck out of here, asshole!" Ray thought he recognized that voice. He headed down the stairs from his second-floor room in the La Quinta, and there she was.
Sure enough, the voice was Larissa. She was standing in the parking lot next to a dirty Dodge minivan with two guys. Ray paused at the bottom of the stairwell to look. Both of the men near Larissa were large redneck looking motherfuckers wearing camo. "Don't be such a bitch, c'mon and party with us for a little while," the larger of the two said.
