My boy friend Clarence has been taking me out for about ten months and we decided to take everything slowly so that every step on the way to our growing relationship was well considered and developed with our eyes open.
We recently talked about when we would begin our intimate relationship and begin having sex. Clarence said he was ready but I thought we could wait a little longer. My mother had told me that having sex would most likely change the nature of a relationship and I was very hesitant to begin right at that time.
I guess I love Clarence all the more for his being patient with me, but as I was already 19, I sometimes thought he was being a little too patient. At age 23, he must have learned that rushing this stage of a relationship had not worked out too well for him in the past.
He was such a considerate young man. I told him I loved him and couldn't imagine myself with any other person ever in my life.
We were beginning to feel one another through our clothes and he has asked me a few times if I would let him put 'Jerry' in my hand, and so far I have been asking him to wait just a little longer. 'Jerry' is his penis of course.
He thought up the name after we saw a Tom and Jerry' cartoon at a movie. Maybe he wanted to name it after the little mouse so I would not have a big image of his organ, or perhaps it was so I wouldn't be disappointed by it's small size, or could it be because he didn't want me to be intimidated by it's possibly large size. Feeling him through his clothes, I thought he had more than a decent 6 inches to use in one way or another. I would never know until I actually saw it and felt it without his clothes covering it up.
In any event, I had some idea what to expect. I hadn't seen one, and diagrams I have seen, nude statues and other art have never shown any to be threatening, so his size was never a consideration. The vibrator I had at home was what I thought an average size of what a penis would be like, but without the vibrations of course.
One night we attended for the engagement party of Suzie and her fiancΓ©, Brad. Suzie is my oldest friend who I met at a pony club at age 11. She and I grew up together, and we have remained close friends ever since. She told me she and Brad started having sex after two dates and then soon after they had a big fight and split up. Five months later, they got back together and have been pretty good together for the year since then.
Suzie has been asking me when Clarence and I might get engaged.
All I've been able to answer her has been 'When it feels like the right time. Maybe sometime soon.'
In my own private thinking, I was beginning to look forward to having sex. I think the only reason we hadn't started at that time was Clarence's over protective concern for my well being.
But back to the party, after we had been there about one hour, had heard all the speeches and watched them open the presents, Clarence and I decided to go parking at a lookout we had been to a few times. I was a little affected by the bourbon and coke cans I had drank and was feeling very aroused.
I said, 'You can do me any time you think you're ready Clarence.'
He told me, 'That would be unlikely as I would only want to take that step when you have full control of all your senses.'
I had fantasized about being taken without my full consent. The way things were going, I wondered what it would take for him to reach the stage where he would 'do' me, an expression some of his mates would use.
There was one night, when Clarence took me to the lookout and I was pretending to be drunk to see if he would 'do' me and get it over with. I flirted with him, but he probably thought it would be unfair to take advantage. Maybe he knew I was faking and thought I was testing him.
Last Thursday night, I called to his place on my way home from work, and we had a pizza and watched a DVD called 'Friends with Benefits'. We talked about it for a while afterwards and he made me desert and a cup of tea, then we went out to his car so he could drive me home.
His car wouldn't start so we called his widowed dad to come over and jump-start the car with his booster cables. His dad, Scott arrived ten minutes later and they attached the booster cables, but the car still wouldn't start.
Clarence was very embarrassed about his old car not working, but his dad said, 'We can look at it in the morning and fix it up in the day-light Clarrie. There's probably only a loose connection stopping it from starting.'
'Would you mind driving Maree home dad? Her place is on the way, . . . .'
His dad interrupted and said, 'My pleasure Clarence. I'd be glad to. I'll see you in the morning son.'
I was surprised he was so pleased to help because Scott had always been a bit remote when Clarence and I were in his company. I can't say I didn't find Clarence's father attractive, but keeping his distance from us always allowed me to remain at a comfortable distance from him. Clarence is his youngest son and his favourite if what he says is true.
There's often possessiveness making it's presence felt when people introduce their partners to family and open or snide remarks can make relations less than comfortable. I guess Clarence's dad was aware of this and stood back from any dealings or advice he may have had for his son and more particularly me.
I took my bag from Clarence's car and kissed him goodnight and climbed into the passenger seat of an early model Buick Scott had restored recently, and he got in beside me and began to drive me home.
After we rounded the third or forth corner, Scott said, 'I might have to stop shortly, Maree. I use my own mix of unleaded fuel and avgas. You can't get the old fuel these cars were made to run on originally so I mix my own and re-fill from Jerry cans.'
'That's OK Scott. You're very kind to help us out and drive me home.'