Canvas of Desire

Julia Kane was standing in front of the oil painting, staring at it so intently that she didn't even notice a woman approaching her.

"Hey, Julia!"

Julia twitched and turned toward the sound.

"Oh, Lana! Hi!"

Julia hugged the blonde woman and kissed her on the cheek.

"Long time no see," said Julia.

Lana scrutinized Julia. "Girl, you look great!"

Julia was wearing what she called an office dress. Black skirt and chiffon blouse with pussycat bow. She was 5'7 and slender, but her hourglass figure was still noticeable.

"I'm turning 41 this year," said Julia. "It's becoming more and more difficult to keep the appearances."

"Don't remind me! At least you don't have two children and overweight."

"Oh, nonsense, Lana. You look great as always!"

Julia noticed that her friend added a few pounds, but her long blonde hair, C-cup breast, and big butt still had the potential to turn men's stare. Especially with that low neck blouse and pencil skirt Lana was wearing.

"This café is fantastic," said Julia to change the subject. "I'm living in Bay Area for 7 years now, and I didn't know it exists."

Lana gestured to one of the tables and sat there. "I knew you will like it the moment I came here for the first time."

All the walls had paintings hanging on them, each with its own lightning. The café looked more like a gallery.

"There are pieces that can go to the regular gallery," said Julia as she sat on the other side of the table.

"Young painters are hanging them here, and you can buy them. The café owner is basically running it as a gallery."

"Really?"

"Yeah, look, there she is," said Lana and nodded toward the brown-haired woman in her fifties that was approaching them with a notebook.

"Welcome to Little Green Bean," said the woman.

"Hi, Beth," replied Lana.

"Oh, hello, Lana. What can I get you?"

"Latte Machiatto with Soy Milk, please."

"And for you, miss?" Asked Beth, looking at Julia.

"Lungo, please," said Julia.

Beth nodded and noted their order into the notebook, turning away.

"Excuse me," said Julia, stopping the woman in her movement. "Are those paintings for sale?"

Beth smiled. "Oh, yes, all of them. Their authors will get all the money after taxes. We are trying to help young artists."

Julia pointed to the painting she was examining a few moments ago. "How much is that one?"

"Ah, Gabriel's latest. Well, that one is five grand. I guess he actually didn't want to sell that one; that's why he put such a high price tag. It's quite daring, isn't it?"

Beth looked at Julia. "There are two more paintings from him of the same size that cost half."

"Yes, I know," nodded Julia and pointed to the wall behind Beth. "There and there."

Beth glanced back and then returned her look at Julia. "You have a good eye. Those are two grand each."

"I want that five thousand painting. Do you accept credit cards?"

Beth shook her head. "Oh, sure, you will get a standard contract. We have those pre-signed by artists."

Julia smiled and nodded. "Perfect. Can you also package it?"

"Sure, I will get it ready for you," said Beth. "I'll go prepare those coffees now and ready that painting."

Once Beth left, Lana whistled. "Wow, is it that good?"

Julia looked at her. "It's raw, unrefined, but full of emotions, and for that price, it's a dead-cheap. I think this coffee will become my new regular stop. Good catch, Lana."

Lana chuckled. "I would never call five thousand dollars item cheap."

"Well, I do own a gallery, and I have a pretty good idea for how much I can sell it. Not that I plan to. At least not right away -- I want to enjoy this one. But let's not talk about that painting now. How is the family?"

Lana put on her sad face. "You mean being a housewife for a stockbroker? Certainly not what I dreamed about when we were at Harward. I envy you your freedom."

Now it was Julia's turn to make a sad smile. "Freedom, Lana? When my father got a male offspring with his second wife, my life was reduced to being a good breeding article."

Julia sighed. She knew it wasn't a good topic for discussion for her, but she started it.

"At least," Julia continued. "I managed to dodge all the marriage proposals for so long that now I'm considered too old. All the viable billionaires that can potentially increase Kane's family wealth are picking 30 years and younger supermodels."

She chuckled. "I had to declare that I'm lesbian right after Harward to stop the flow of bidders."

Lana laughed. "Yeah, I remember that one. Derek was asking me how many times I slept with you."

Julia laughed as well. "Did you tell him?"

"What? That we made out the same night, I slept with him for the first time? No way!"

Julia leaned back and took a deep breath to stop the laughing. "That was crazy party."

Lana nodded. "I don't remember much, only that Derek was unstoppable. He later admitted that he took three viagras to make sure that he would not fail."

Both of them started to laugh again and stopped after Beth came with their coffees.

"I was so drunk," confessed Julia. "That I thought you are Peter."

"That cute blond boy that sat in the row behind us?"

"Yeah, I had a crush on him," said Julia, shaking her head. "So there I was, pawing Peter, only to find out that he is wearing miniskirt without panties!"

"Cause I put them into Derek's mouth when he started to moan during sex. Then I realized I won't be able to wear them again," said Lana, and they started to laugh again.

When Julia composed herself again, she shook her head. "God, I love our conversations. We should do it more often."

Lana nodded and smiled. "Yeah."

They continued to discuss for another hour before Julia's phone alerted her about the next meeting she had to attend. She paid for painting and coffee and left the café with the picture wrapped in linen. Fortunately, her car was parked just outside of the building.

***

Gabriel entered the café, and his nightmare became a reality. The place where the painting hung just three days ago was empty.

Beth noticed him and started walking toward him with a smile.

"Gabriel!" She announced cheerfully. "One lady bought your painting just this morning! Congratulations!"

Gabriel collapsed into the nearest chair, bending and holding his head with both hands.

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

He thought.

Beth stopped and watched him, worried. "What's wrong?"

"Do you know who bought it, Beth? I need to get that painting back."

Beth sat in a chair next to him. "Well, sure, it's in the contract. It's some gallery in Pacific Heights."

Gabriel sighed. He hoped he wasn't too late to stop the painting from being exhibited in a gallery.

***

Julia was sitting in the chair, going thru quarterly reports of one of Kane's Group companies. A quiet knock on the door interrupted the pain she was feeling watching the numbers in red.

"Yes?"

Julia's assistant Cathrine entered and closed the door behind her. "There is a young man here who wants to see you regarding some painting that you supposedly bought. I said that there is no new painting, but he is convinced you bought his painting. Should I call the guard?"

Julia's eyebrow went up. "Let him in," she said and stood up, walking around the desk.

Cathrine went out, and soon after, a young man with Asian features entered. He was six feet tall, with brown hair, cut into a messy side swept with short sides on top of his square face. He had broad shoulders with well-defined muscles that could be seen thru his tight shirt, and his brown eyes stared at Julia.

Not bad, not bad at all,

was the first thought that run thru Julia's mind.

"Hi," said Julia.

The young man was staring at Julia, silent. She waved her hand before his face.

"Hello?" She said again.

He blinked and shook his head. "Ah, sorry," he finally said. "Hello. I'm Gabriel Jang. I drew a painting that I believe you bought this morning."

Julia nodded and moved aside. She pointed at the painting that was leaning against the wall.

"Yes!" Said Gabriel. "That one. I need to buy it back."

Julia frowned. Nobody talked to her like this in her office.

What the hell? Where are your manners?

"No," she said.

***

Gabriel entered the office and quickly looked around. It was a spacious room with a big window on the left side overseeing the San Francisco Bay and the walls covered by paintings. There was a desk in the back of a room, and in front of it stood the most beautiful woman Gabriel has ever seen.

She was probably around 40 years old and about 5'8 tall but had black high-heeled stilettos, so her emerald eyes were on Gabriel's level. She had an oval face and black hair combed into a ponytail. Even though slender, her body still got the curves -- her B cups were noticeable under her white blouse. They created a perfect hourglass shape together with her hips covered by the black skirt.

"Hi," said the woman, and Gabriel was lost in the sound of her voice.

"Hello?" She said again and this time waved her hand in front of Gabriel.

Wake up and say your thing, you idiot!

His brain reignited his focus.

"Ah, sorry," he said, mostly apologizing to his brain.

Then he started the line he rehearsed on his way here. "Hello. I'm Gabriel Jang. I drew a painting that I believe you bought this morning."

The woman nodded and stepped aside so that Gabriel saw his painting next to the back wall.

"Yes!" He said. "That one. I need to buy it back."

"No," said woman resolutely.

Gabriel expected this. But he was surprised by the tone. It was not the honey voice that greeted him. He knew he messed up. He had no right to use that demanding tone.

"I'm sorry about my tone, Madam," he said. "I didn't want to be disrespectful."

"Kane," the woman said. "Miss Julia Kane."

Gabriel nodded, but his brain was not comprehending. How could such beauty still be unmarried?

"Apology accepted," continued Miss Kane. "Answer is still no. But I would like to know the reason for this request."

"Nevermind that," said Gabriel. "It's okay."

She won't give it back anyway—no point in telling her.

Gabriel bowed. "Have a nice day, Miss Kane."

***

"Have a nice day, Miss Kane," he said and bowed.

Julia realized at that moment; he was leaving for good. She didn't expect him to give up so quickly. He was supposed to beg, lie, come up with excuses.

"That's it?" She said, and Gabriel stopped. "You tracked me down, and now you just give up?"

He turned back. "It's a painting of my girlfriend. She didn't know I drew it, and when she found it hanging on the wall, she was pissed and broke up with me. I thought getting the painting back might help to win her back."

Well, considering the content of the painting, I can relate to the feeling.

Thought Julia and nodded.

But Julia knew there was more to the tone he asked for repurchase. "You actually don't want to get that painting back," she said.

"What? Why would I come otherwise?"

"You've been rehearsing that introducing line, but not the critical part."

Julia tilted her head. "What did you plan to do with that painting?" She asked. "What would your girlfriend wanted you to do."

Gabriel pressed his lips and looked at Julia.

Julia nodded. "She would want you to destroy it, right?"

Gabriel didn't answer, but it was evident. He actually didn't want to get that painting back; he couldn't imagine himself destroying it. Julia, too, had several sculptures she would never be able to part with.

"Do you have other paintings that are like this one? Not published ones?"

"Why?"

"I won't give you the painting back, not if there is a chance it will be destroyed. But if you can provide me with something interesting, I might put this one in the safe and not exhibit it."

"How will that help me?"

"Your girlfriend just felt naked on that wall in the café when she saw it for the first time. Telling her that it will not be available for the public might be enough for her to forgive you. Plus, I will pay you for those paintings if I pick any."

Julia was observing Gabriel as he was looking at her. For a reason, she did not understand; she didn't want him to go. Maybe it was just that she didn't want to lose such a talented artist, she thought. He was scratching his shaven jaw, biting his lips. Julia realized she is examining his features as if he was her sculpture model.

"Sure," he said. "I have other things in the portfolio. I can bring hi-res photos."

"Okay. Let me check my calendar," said Julia and walked around her desk to check her schedule.

"Can you be here at eight o'clock?" She asked.

"Like this evening?" Gabriel asked, and Julia nodded. "Sure, I live in Tenderloin."

"Good."

Julia sat in her chair and smiled. "Looking forward to it."

Gabriel stood still for a moment, then bowed. "See you soon, Miss Kane," he said and left.

***

Gabriel was sitting on the couch in the office next to Miss Kane's. Her assistant was typing and ignored him. His portfolio was in the big folder next to him. It was half-past eight, and according to what Miss Kane's assistant told him, a "telco" took longer than expected. But now that he looked Julia Kane up on the internet, he understood.

Till this moment, he had no idea someone like her existed, but there were thousands of articles about her everywhere. She was the eldest child of Carl Kane, the billionaire owner of Kane's Group. Julia Kane was on boards of several companies, and she also owned the gallery; he was sitting in.

Gabriel even found some tabloid articles about her from 15 years ago, when her private life was in the scopes of paparazzi. These articles died out about 10 years ago, probably because she announced that she is lesbian and is not planning on marrying anyone. She quickly became uninteresting for tabloids -- no scandals, no partners.

As Gabriel had time to evaluate this information, he praised his ignorance when he came here for the first time. Had he known, he wouldn't have even tried to come to convince someone like her to sell back the painting. And that would mean he wouldn't have the opportunity to make more money and possibly even get his pictures into a real gallery.

And he wouldn't have met her in person.

Gabriel could feel his heart rate going up, just thinking that he will meet her again. He didn't understand that. Yes, she was good-looking for her age, which was undeniable. Still, Gabriel never preferred older women up to this moment. She was not much younger than his mom.

Miss Kane's office door opened, and she was staying in them. Gabriel's heart started to race.

"Pardon the delay, please, come in," she said, looking at Gabriel.

Then she looked at her assistant. "You can go home, Cathrine. We are done for today."

"Are you sure, Miss Kane?" Said Cathrine. "I can wait to help you close the office."

"Absolutely, go home, Cathrine."

"Okay."

Miss Kane looked at Gabriel, that stood in front of the couch, holding the portfolio folder. "Come," she said and vanished into the office.

"Grab the chair," she said as he entered the office.

Gabriel sat on one of the chairs that were in front of her desk. Miss Kane reached to Gabriel with her hand. He gave her the folder.

She opened it and started going thru it at a fast pace. She was sorting the photos into two piles.

When she went thru all 34 pieces, she took the smaller pile and started going thru it again, this time slower. She put most of the papers on a bigger pile. In the end, only four pieces remained.

"Let's talk about these," she said, looking up at Gabriel.

"Okay, what do you want to know?" Said Gabriel and took the pictures from her.

He recognized the paintings right away.

Gabriel looked at Miss Kane with surprise. In five minutes, she identified the most significant pieces that he ever made. The thing was, those paintings were meaningful for him, and he never thought they were outstanding.

"What's their story?" Asked Miss Kane.

"Miss Kane..."

"Gabriel, you are good, and in ten years, you will be great, but to get there, you must be consistent in quality."

She pointed to the higher pile. "You gave me 30 average paintings. I want to know why those you are holding are different."

Gabriel was staring at her. She was returning the gaze.

"It's personal," he said.

"It's art. It's always personal."

Miss Kane put her hand on the higher pile. "But this is emotionless personal."

She bobbed her head toward Gabriel. "That is emotion. There you gave part of yourself. You need to realize what it was and how to do it consistently."

Gabriel looked at pictures in his hand. She read him like a book, he thought. He knew she was right.

He put one picture in front of her. "This is the death of my sister and father. It's oldest of those paintings."

Gabriel gazed at Miss Kane, expecting questions, but she just nodded.

He took the second picture. "This was drawn in the morning after my first sex attempt."

He chuckled. "Curious why I hadn't draw anything after second sex, which was even worse."

Miss Kane smiled.

Gabriel handed her the third picture. "This is mom's second wedding."

Miss Kane's eyes widened. "Interesting," she said.

"Why?"

"This painting is full of joy," she explained. "I don't remember my father's second wedding as a joyous event."

"My mother was in a very dark place till David, my current step-father, came. When she married him, it was the day when she smiled like before my sister's death."

"I see. Sorry, it was inappropriate."

Gabriel shook his head. "No, I get it. I'm just glad that my experience is that different compared to most people."

He returned the last picture. "This is after I got a scholarship to CCA."

***

Gabriel gave Julia the last picture. "This is after I got a scholarship to CCA."

"You are studying at California College of Arts?" She asked.

"The first year, I did," he said. "I'm not sure I will be able to raise enough money for the second year."

So he is nineteen or twenty. God, I'm so old.

"You are not taking a student loan?" She asked.

For most people, it was a no-brainer, but Julia knew that the tuition in this school was high, and most of the students would have a hard time repaying it as artists.

"Tuition is brutal," said Gabriel. "And then what? I will be MFA hoping to be one of the lucky artists that make millions. I'm okay with being an artist that makes enough to live without crushing debts. There are cheaper ways how to get an education."

He looked at Julia and raised his hands in defense gesture. "Ah, sorry," he said. "I don't want to insult your education."

Julia chuckled. "It's okay. I commend you for this way of thinking. I'm sure I wouldn't have chosen Harward if my parents wouldn't be wealthy."

Julia was looking at those pictures and could not wait to stand in front of oil originals. There was, however, one more painting that she wanted to know about. And it was behind her.

She pointed at the painting. "And the story of this one?"

Gabriel looked at her. "Really?"

Julia could see a change in his expression. Was it sadness?

"Yes. I want to understand why this painting is such a problem."

Gabriel was quiet for a moment. "You won't tell anyone?"

"You have my word," Julia promised.

"It was my birthday. We just had sex. And Hannah, my girlfriend, asked me if I have a secret wish she could fulfill. We were drunk, and I told her I want to watch her masturbate. The thing is, she never did it before, at least she told me. And so it was her first, and she... Ended up squirting."

Julia looked at the painting and finally identified what the lines going down the legs meant. She swallowed her saliva and realized that a warmth started to spread in her crotch.