Chapter 5: The Last Rose Of Summer
Author's Note: This is the last of a 5-part series. To fully appreciate this story one must have read the previous four installments.
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I was sitting out on the deck enjoying what might have been the last decent evening of the summer. We were starting to get some cool days and I knew that I would have to close the pool on the weekend. Although there had been some dark threatening clouds earlier in the evening, they had cleared off around sunset and the night air was balmy and warm. I was contemplating a final late night swim before retiring. Tossing back a final swig of Chablis, I heard the doorbell. I tucked the towel around my waist and went inside to answer it. Damn, it was awful late for company. I answered the door only to see Allie standing on my porch, wearing this light little sundress that buttoned all the way down the front. She smiled hesitantly but sweetly, knowing what the flash of her teeth and tongue could do to me, even now.
"Hi," she said softly, her glowing smile still able to soften me right up.
"Hi," I replied. "How's it going?"
"Okay. Can I come in?" she asked, bowing her head forward just a bit so that as she looked up at me, her steely blue eyes looked large and appealing.
"Sure, I guess," I said opening the door for her. "So why the honor?"
"I had to see you tonight, Greg," she began, taking a step toward me.
"Are you sure that's a good idea?"
"I don't know," she remarked, holding back. "All I know is that I had to see you, to talk to you, to try and let you know how I feel."
"What's to tell?" I remarked, trying not to sound too cold. "We've gone over all of this before, Allie. You're married to someone else and you already know how I feel about that; you already know why I can't be with you. Unless you've got some signed divorce papers with you, nothing has changed that I know of."
"Can we sit down some place?" she asked.
"I'm sorry, Allie," I said. "I guess that just because we're not an item any longer doesn't mean that I'm allowed to be rude. Come on. I was out on the deck, enjoying the evening."
We moved out to the deck. I stopped and grabbed the Chablis and a second glass on the way through the kitchen. We sat at the table and she looked longingly out at the pool, the light below the water line casting an eerie aqua glow about the yard.
"I'm going to miss this," she said dreamily as I poured her glass. "Thanks," she responded, picking up the glass and taking a sip. She let her head fall back for a moment savoring the taste of the wine before shifting her position to lean forward in the chair toward me. The glow of the citronella candles turned her face a golden hue. "I'm really sorry about what happened with us, Greg. I don't know what I was thinking. I was so stupid to think that maybe if I just ignored certain things that they'd go away."
"Right, ignore the fact that you have a husband. Sure is an easy little detail to put out of mind."
"Greg, please," she said. "This is so hard for me."
The clip of her accent was so appealing as were those great steely blue eyes that were now filling with tears that glistened in the candlelight.
"I'm sorry," I replied starting to feel teary eyed myself. "I guess that was mean."
"You know, I'm still in love with you," she said, looking down into her wine glass. "I think about you all the time. I dream about you. Good dreams. No, very, very good dreams. I keep thinking of what it would be like to see you again, to talk with you, to be with you." She looked back up and into my eyes. "You haven't returned any of my calls. I've tried calling Kate and Jack and they keep telling me to call you. I just don't know what to do."
"You know, Allie," I began, "Not that this matters now, but I still feel the same way about you too. I've tried hard to put you out of my mind but nothing works, nothing helps. Like the old song says, I close my eyes and see your face before me, haunting my every dream."
"So what are we going to do?" she asked. "I want to be with you. Do you still want me?"
"What about your husband?" I asked.
"I don't know what to do about him. I just can't leave him."
"But then you can't have me either."
"Greg, please," she cried. "Isn't there some way we can work this out? I need you in my life."
"Damn! Why do I have to be such a gentleman?" I complained. "All my life I've watched guys like Jack and Robby reach out and grab for what they want while I lay back and go without because something keeps holding me back for some stupid reason or other."
"Maybe you need to do something for yourself without having any reason at all."
"Something for me or something for you?"
"Something for us," she whispered. She was leaning so close to me I could almost feel the heat from her body. "Something that we both want. I can see it in your eyes when you look at me, I can feel it just sitting next to you."
Looking over at her closely she appeared to be glistening in the hot humid air. Her dark silky hair was pulled back away from her face and held on each side with a little blue butterfly clip. Her lips were wet and parted and her eyes were very clear in their intent. She looked so appealing that I finally had to look away and sigh deeply.
"You know, just a few weeks ago, I felt so in charge of myself, of my career, of my life," I began. "Things were going so well at work, the summer was in full swing, and I was in love with this beautiful young woman, the woman of my dreams. Now, the summer is almost over, work seems more like a drudge, and I've found out that the woman is married to someone else. You've got to understand that I'm not in the same place I was."
"But neither am I," she said leaning back into her chair. "Since I haven't seen you, I'm miserable, bitchy with my co-workers, curt with my customers. I need you in my life, Greg. You balance me; you make me feel so good about myself. You do things for me that Chad has never been able to do, will never be able to do."