That Damned Valentine's Day Card - A Different View
This story uses the "
Hall Pass
" or "
Get Out of Jail Free Card
" as a plot device. If you feel that no sane man would give the woman he loves such a pass - I am in complete agreement. But this is fiction and requires the suspension of disbelief. If you can't suspend disbelief, you won't enjoy this story so I would recommend you skip this one and move on; there are a lot of great stories on this site and I hope you find one you enjoy.
This story follows the same trajectory as a story by
Tx Tall Tales
,
That Damned Valentine's Day Card
that I highly recommend:
https://www.literotica.com/s/that-damned-valentines-day-card
. Although I have used the same premise, this story is very different, having a different dialogue and dynamic between the characters and a different ending. I have written
Tx Tall Tales
several times asking for comments on my version and received no response. It is unfortunate for all of us that
Tx Tall Tales
has not published a story since March, 2017. He was a great writer with a creative flair.
For the rest of you, I sincerely hope you enjoy the story.
Chapter One - I am an Idiot
Ask yourself three questions:
Am I a man?
Have I ever been in love?
Did I ever do something stupid because I was in love?
If you've answered "yes" to the first two questions, a "yes" to the third question is almost inevitable. If you answered "no" to the first question, chances are you have observed the results of question 3. While women can and do make mistakes; in my experience profound stupidity in demonstrating love is the sole provenance of men.
Maybe your "something stupid" was making a complete fool of yourself: saying something profoundly stupid in an attempt to be clever; trying to impress her with your athletic abilities and falling flat on your face (albeit the nurse in the emergency room was cute); or buying a ring you really couldn't afford and having to eat Spam for six months in order to be able to pay your rent. The list of examples is endless.
For me, it was giving her a "Get out of jail free" card when I proposed. I should say when I proposed the second time. The first time I proposed, I didn't get the "Yes" from her that I was expecting, FULLY EXPECTING. I loved her more than anyone or anything and I knew she loved me. We were devoted to each other. Our physical and emotional connection was beyond anything either of us had ever imagined. We were one of those couples that finished each other's sentences and even fed each other bites of food when we went out. Yes, you can add that last bit to the list of stupid things we do when love makes us blind. One science writer Katherine Wu, writing for the Harvard Blog "Science in the News" referred to it as the "Total Eclipse of the Brain".
But, instead of the expected "Yes" she said "We need to talk". Fuck.
We did talk after about four days of my blinding drunk when I had locked myself in my apartment consuming more alcohol than I thought possible. I'm not exaggerating when I say that I could have died from alcohol poisoning, if I had been that lucky. She was curled in a ball outside my apartment door and I stepped over her when I finally emerged.
She sprang to her feet "Alex, please don't. I'll marry you. I love you with all my heart. Please don't leave me!! God, Alex, PLEASE, PLEASE don't leave me." She was sobbing uncontrollably.
"No Sheri. I'm not going to force you to marry me just because you feel guilty for having hurt me. If you couldn't say "Yes" when I asked either you don't love me or you are not ready for a commitment. I understand, you are only 21 and still in college. I'm only 25. Marriage is off the table at least for the foreseeable future. It's just that I thought... I thought that what we have been to each other was a once-in-a-lifetime thing. I thought that you felt that way too. You surprised me. You surprised everyone: your parents; my parents; our friends. They all thought you would say "yes". They were congratulating me, us thinking you said "yes."
"Alex, please. Let's talk. I don't want to lose you."
Talk we did, and talked. For over a year, we talked. The first three months I was civil. I was polite. I was distant. I was preparing for her exit from my life. It was rough. She was my best friend and that made the loss of her from my life even more painful. The next three months we resumed our friendship but not with benefits. It was another four months before we resumed our romantic relationship which we restarted slowly and built from there. By that time, I had just about paid off the ring.
The sum total of her words after that year was "Alex, you know that I love you more than anything. I will forever regret how I hurt you. I was scared. I wasn't ready. There is so much of life I have yet to experience. Will I be the same person in five or ten or even twenty years? I don't know. But I do know that my life will be a lot less happy, a lot less fulfilling if you are not a part of it. I was and perhaps I still am afraid. What if someday there is something I want that you don't? Am I to put that aside, to just give it up? And will I feel bitter and resentful for doing so?"
In truth, I could not imagine my life without her. I didn't know what doubts she still had or how I could relieve them. So, I asked "Is this about sex? You always seem so satisfied. I know I am. I know you love me; no one would have stayed for the last year if they didn't. I can't imagine that either you or I could think there could be a deeper emotional connection than what we have. So that leaves the physical aspect. Do you want something or someone else? Are you not satisfied with me or are you afraid of missing out, of settling for something that you would come to regret?"
"Alex, our sex life is beyond great. I never thought I could feel the things I feel when I'm with you. It' so different than anything I felt before. You manage to satisfy, I should say MORE than satisfy my desire, and also to make me feel loved. No one has ever done that before."
I injected "But..."
"You know I'm a lot less experienced than you with regard to sex. That used to bother me. I've worried that I wouldn't meet your expectations. But since meeting you, I can't separate sex from the emotional bond, the love, that we have. And that's how it should be. My mom told me the best thing that can happen in life is to fall in love with your best friend and I have. But what would happen if someday I felt that I had missed out? Would I succumb to temptation? Alex, I could never betray you but there will always be risks and uncertainties in life and temptations. I am so afraid of disappointing you."
"Sheri, you could never disappoint me. I trust you with my life and I love you more than I can express in words."
Then I made the most monumental mistake since the Japanese decided to bomb Pearl Harbor. The day before Valentine's Day I went to a jewelry store and got an expensive box, lined in blue velvet with a gold clasp. I made a card. On one side it said "Get Out of Jail Free". On the reverse I wrote "Whatever you want. One Time only."
On Valentine's Day I spread the floor of my apartment with rose petals, chilled Champagne, and gave her several cards and helium balloons. Then, before going down on one knee to give her the ring, I gave her the box with 'the card'.
"Sheri. I know that life is full of uncertainties and temptations. I also know that I can't imagine my life without you. If this is what it takes to show the depth of my love for you, then here."
She opened the box, read the card and her eyes filled with tears.