"I don't know where that came from. It was asked about on the lie detector test."
"How about the patients she mentioned?"
"There were actually five of them." The audience booed loudly. "Steve, I'm an alcoholic. I haven't had a drink in over twenty years. Those patients were nursing home residents and they were also either alcoholics or drug addicts. I took them with me several times to my regular Tuesday night AA meeting. I took them out to eat once too. Julie went with us. That's the entire story."
"How about all the calls from nurses?"
"Completely true." The audience booed again. "Steve, I am a Physician. I take care of patients in about a dozen nursing homes. When I'm on call, two nights a week and every third weekend the calls are constant. Every call is either from a nurse or our office staff. When I'm not on call the phone never rings." The audience was quiet.
"Anything else you'd like add, Art?"
"After the results, Steve."
"Julie, are you ready to hear our results?"
"I am, Steve." A stage hand handed Steve a handful of papers.
"This was a long test. We covered each topic separately and will break it down the same way. We asked Art, when you said you were teaching your brother-in-law to drive a stick were you really out with women who weren't your wives? You said No. The test said you told the truth." The audience applauded. Julie and I were watching each other. "We asked, did you make any passes at your wife's sister? You said No. The test said you told the truth." The audience applauded again. "When you have claimed to go to medical conferences is that where you really were? You said yes. On these trips did you have any kind of sexual contact with anyone? You said No. All the results came back the same and you told the truth?" Again the audience applauded. "He's batting a thousand so far, Julie. Any comments?" She shook her head no. "We asked, during your Army reunion did you have sexual contact with your ex-wife? You answered no. During your trip to Phoenix did you have any sexual contact with your ex-wife. You said No. The results came back the same to both questions. You told the truth." Again the audience applauded. "We asked, have you ever had any sexual contact with your wife's gay cousin or his husband? You said No. Have you ever had sex with the gay doctor you worked with? You said No. We asked, have you ever had sex with a male? You said No. The results were the same on all three questions. You were telling the truth." The audience was now quiet. "We asked Art, have you ever had any sexual contact with either of your sisters? You said No. Have you ever had sexual contact with a patient? You said No. We asked, are any of the calls you get from people you have or are planning to have sex with? Again, you said No. The test determined you were telling the truth. We asked a final question. Since being in a relationship with Julie, have you had any sexual contact with anyone but her? You said No. You told the truth." The audience stood and clapped.
Julie stood grinning and started toward me. I held up my hands for her to stop. Her smile faded.
"Steve, may I say something?"
"I think you've earned that much."
"Thank you. Steve, she knew I wasn't cheating all along. Julie's goal with this was to embarrass me and make me angry enough that I would divorce her."
Julie shouted, "That's not true!"
"Steve, see the man in the far back row of your audience with the blue shirt and baseball cap?" Steve turned and looked. So did the TV camera. The man hid his face. "That is Dr. Michael Leavey, her lover." Julie lowered her head. I turned to her. "You didn't think I knew about it, did you?"
"Julie, is it true?" Steve asked. She didn't look up or respond.
"Steve, it's been going on for about six months. They want to make it permanent but Julie signed a pre-nup. I was very wealthy when we married. If I found out and divorced her for adultry she gets nothing. I have audio and hard core video of their trists. More than enough to prove my case."
"She brought you here so you would get mad and divorce her?"
"Yes. She knew that sooner or later I would find out about her affair and was trying to make me just dump her before I did. That way she gets half of everything. Since I know, she'll get nothing. Michael is using her to get our money. My money now. She wasn't aware of that. You gave the lie detector test to the wrong person."
"Julie, talk to us. Is this true?" The camera cut to Michael who was rushing to leave. "I certainly didn't expect this."
I handed Steve my airline ticket. "I won't be needing this. I'm not traveling anywhere with her."
"So what happens now, Art?"
"I'll be returning home and moving out. My attorney already has the divorce paperwork ready. I'm filing for adultery. She can stay in our house until it's final in six months then she'll have to leave. She will get nothing but her personal belongings." The audience applauded.
The camera turned to Julie who was still sitting with her head down. "Julie, you lied and cheated on your devoted husband. You used my show and blatantly lied to me and my audience. You're a loser and I hope things turn out just like Art said. You are a despicable human being and you can get the hell off my stage." The audience went wild as she ran off the stage.
I shook Steve's hand and left from the opposite side of the stage.
I walked in the front door of our home two days later to pack up some things to move out. Julie was waiting there for me.
"Can we talk about this, Art?" she asked.
"Did you get the divorce papers?"
"Yes."
"Then what's left to talk about?"
"Are you really going to leave me with nothing?"
"That's exactly what I'm going to do. It's what you deserve. You and Michael can start from scratch just like we did."
"He dumped me."
"You want me to be sad for you? I knew he would. He just wanted your money."
"Don't do this. I'm sorry."
"I didn't do this, Julie. You did."
"It wasn't supposed to turn out like this."
"No, you were planning on getting half of everything then you and Michael live happily ever after."
"Something like that. You knew about Michael for months. Why didn't you say something?"
"I loved you and hoped that it would pass so we could stay together. I really do love you."
"We could go to counseling."
"We could have but your final solution killed any chance of that."
"I could fight the divorce."
"Did you get the DVD with the divorce papers?"
"Yes."
"Did you watch it?"
"The first few minutes then I had to turn it off."
"You missed the most graphic parts. You should watch the rest."
"Why? I think I know what's on there."
"So you'll know what your friends and family will be watching if you fight the divorce."
"You wouldn't."
"Yes, Julie. I would."
"Art, you don't have to move out. The house is plenty big enough for both of us until the divorce."
"I can't stay. I've got an apartment. You have the house and I'll cover the utilities and things until you leave."
"Will you keep the house?"
"No. Too many memories."
"Art, I really am sorry."
"So am I, Julie. This was never what I wanted."
I got up and packed a couple of bags. I could hear Julie downstairs crying. When I finished I took the bags to my car then walked back inside to say goodbye. I stood looking at her from across the room but couldn't make myself approach.
"Julie?" She looked at me, still crying. "I love you." I turned and left.
The show aired the following week. The reviews were mixed. About a fourth of the comments ate me alive for exposing her. Word of what happened and the show got back to where Julie and Michael worked. They were both fired for violations of the company fraternization rules. Michael left the state. Julie found work in a doctor's office. She called occasionally just to talk but never brought up reconciliation and she didn't fight the divorce. I never would have sent the DVD as I threatened. I think she knew that.
The whole episode changed me. I really did, do, love her. I lost my faith in the idea of marriage. Who knows, maybe one day I'll meet someone but for now that sounds like a sick joke.
When the divorce was final I put the house up for sale and it sold quickly. About a month after it sold I took a leave of absence from work and have been traveling. As I sit here on the beach in Aruba writing this I have no idea where Julie is or what she's doing. I genuinely hope she's happy and that all her hopes and dreams are fulfilled.