I agreed to meet Martin for lunch the next afternoon because I was still angry and hurt and I wanted to see just how far my husband was willing to take the whole thing when he knew that it was against my wishes.
When we walked into the restaurant Martin was pretty much as Lucinda had described and he was clever and charming and immediately put Jeremy and I at ease. I found myself enjoying the lunch and conversation in spite of myself.
At first we talked about travel in general and our past travel experiences. Then we talked about what we had majored in in college. I had majored in History and Art and Jeremy had majored in Sociology and Political Science. During our conversation Martin asked us what we thought about several different subjects in our areas of study and I could tell he was judging just how knowledgeable we were in our fields and about the world. When I said to him that I felt that once I left university I felt that my real education could begin he asked what I meant and I told him, "Now I have the time to read the books I want to about Art and History and Philosophy that I want to and I don't have to worry about interpreting those books the same way my professors do to keep my grade average up."
He laughed when I said that and responded, "Thank God you managed to graduate from university without those silly academics stealing your intelligence and filling your head with all sorts of politically correct tapioca pudding!"
After the meal we retired to the lounge and over a glass of port (he told us he preferred the LBV's or late bottled vintage ports because he just could not put away a bottle for ten or twenty years at this point in his life) he told us a little bit about himself.
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Martin told us he first left the United States in 1966 to go to graduate school in Stockholm, Sweden. He took a graduate degree there in International Economics and he also met his wife Ulla there. They returned to the United States in 1968 and Martin could not believe the changes that had taken place in two years. It was now the Age of Aquarius and Flower Power.
Martin took a job with one of the world's preeminent brokerage houses and they bought a place on the avenues in San Francisco as his career took off. Martin was from the Bay Area and Ulla loved San Francisco because it reminded her of Stockholm. In Martin's words Ulla was very beautiful and always turned a lot of heads in her own right. But then a movie called "Beyond the Green Door" came out and its star, Marilyn Chambers, bore a remarkable resemblance to Ulla.
He told us that more than a few times she was asked for her autograph. Usually it was by young guys who would not believe her when she said they were mistaken, but often young women would ask her for her autograph for their boyfriends. After a while it became a secret joke with us and she would give them the autograph signing Marilyn Chambers name.
"One day we were out shopping and two young girls came up and asked her for her autograph. One of the girls asked her to make it to her boy friend Gary and would she write, "Gary you were the best of the bunch, Love Marilyn Chambers." He told us.
The second girl, who just kept staring at who she thought was Marilyn Chambers in awe, finally worked up the nerve to ask in a shaking voice, "What was it like?"
"Ulla answered, "What was what like?"
"Being with all those guys at once," she clarified blushing with embarrassment.
"Ulla smiled at the girl and then said, "Unimaginable."
"That afternoon when we decided we had better see the movie we had no idea what an impact it would make on our lives." Martin told us with a sardonic smile.
Martin then went on to tell us how during the movie Ulla had reached over and put her hand in Martin's lap and upon feeling his erection leaned over and whispered in his ear, "I can tell this movie is turning you on too."
Martin told us that during the drive home Ulla asked him, "What do you think it would be like to be that woman?"
"I told her that as a man I really did not know if I could imagine the woman's perspective. Ulla then asked me then what did I think it would be like to be one of the men. I told her that the answer to that would depend on my relationship to the woman." Martin said shaking his head for emphasis.
What did she say to that Jeremy asked?
"Ulla gave me a look I will never forget and then said, "What if the woman was your wife?" Martin told us.
What did you answer I finally asked after a long silence passed?
"Ulla and I were always totally honest with one another, although I sometimes wish, in retrospect, that I would not have been so honest in my answer to that question. I told her that it would be a gigantic turn-on to bring her that much pleasure and to see her so totally without inhibition, but that I would also feel tremendously insecure. When she asked why I would feel insecure but not jealous I explained that I really believe that jealousy and insecurity are one in the same. I told her that I would not be jealous of other men knowing the pleasures of her body, but I would be jealous of the pleasure those men might be able to give her because I would be afraid, or insecure if you will, that they might pleasure her so much that I would lose her to one or even all of them." Martin told us in a low voice.
Martin took another drink of his port before continuing. "Ulla then said to me that she knew that there was a big difference between sex and love. She told me that she loved me because I was kind, intelligent, funny and thoughtful not because of the sex we had together. She told me that she thought sex for the sake of pleasure alone was possible without affecting our relationship. She told me that she would never be unfaithful to me but that she was curious what it would be like to be with more than one man at once and what it would be like to be with a black man. She reminded me that I had been her first and only lover and wanting to experiment a little was only natural."
When I asked Martin how can a wife experiment with other men a little and not be unfaithful Martin answered, "She told me that as long as I was a part of her pleasure, either as a participant or as the orchestrator of it, then the others would simply be my instruments to give her pleasure and if we loved one another we should want to give each other pleasure in anyway we could."