The Veronica Story Pt 05

--Part Five - He is Me --

Over the next month I found that I was leaving my house a few minutes earlier each day that I stopped in for coffee just so I could have a few extra minutes in discussions. I didn't want to arrive too early because I knew that Jonah didn't leave until about seven. I was thinking, if I could get to the apartment within a few minutes of Jonah leaving, there would be more time to chat and enjoy the coffee.

One morning, I pulled in and Jonah was pulling out. He smiled and waved at me, certainly not in a snarky way, but genuinely friendly. Obviously, he wasn't pissed off that I had cum in his wife's panties. I thought he was running late or maybe, I needed to adjust my timing but when I mentioned this to Veronica, she laughed and told me I was a baby. "Why are you so afraid of Jonah? She asked. "He likes you, he isn't going bite."

"How can he like me, all we've done is pass each other in the driveway." I questioned.

"He likes you because I talk about you. We talk about you. He knows how you make my day every time we have coffee or you take Emma and me to lunch. Why wouldn't he like you if I like you?"

I stood there somewhat puzzled. I was invested in this private friendship; revealing, confessing, and admitting to personal private things, and I thought, acting as that sounding board for Veronica. "Did you tell him I have done gay things? Does he know about the panties?"

Veronica reached out and held my forearm. "Jonah doesn't care about that." She paused and then continued. "Did you think that what we are having is an affair? Do you think that all this being nice and helping me and buying things for Emma ends up with you leaving your family and me leaving mine so we can be together? Have I led you on because I'm not some prude who has to wear a long skirt or stand at an arm's length when you visit?"

"Veronica, no. I'm not saying that. I guess I just had this weird idea that what we talked about, at least the private stuff, stayed private."

"James, I need you to understand that Jonah and I have an incredibly mature relationship. He doesn't get jealous or spy on me because he trusts me and we really don't judge one another in a way that would cause us to hide things. I mean, I have opened up to you in ways that I never had with Jonah, but once we talked, I shared my feelings and your advice and opinions with Jonah, and that's all the more reason for him to appreciate you."

I looked at my watch, it was only ten after seven and I had suddenly wished it was seven-thirty. I needed to confront my own feelings and Veronica was the only person I felt completely honest with. But it is my nature to try to fix things and avoid confrontation. "You're right." I said. "You know I love my wife and I have no intention of leaving her, no matter what I may say about her. But Veronica, I know this is going to sound crazy, but I'm pretty sure I have fallen in love with you."

"It's not crazy." Veronica responded. "I fell in love with you months ago, but it isn't anything bad. Jonah knows I love you because we share these things. Hell, Jonah thinks I should have sex with you, but he is sort of weird that way."

Suddenly I liked this Jonah guy. "Uh, can you explain this to me?"

"C'mon," she started. "You have to know that I gave the panties to Jonah. Right?"

I smiled but didn't say anything.

"He wanted every single detail and as I rode his dick and told him how I let you play with my nipple, he kept sniffing those panties. I swear, it was like a new drug. He said he could taste your cum mixed with mine. All he could talk about was wanting you to fuck me."

"Is this for real?" I asked. It wasn't like I was unfamiliar with these feelings. I mean, how many times in my own life have I asked my wife to describe every detail she could remember about a sexual encounter with another guy. I've seen the Internet, I'm sure as hell not the only man to ever have this particular kink. Yet, I never saw myself as one of the guys you choose to be your "special friend". "Veronica, I keep just having to ask myself, why me?"

"Look," she began, "When Jonah met me, I was working across the street from the base at The Rainbow Lounge." She paused for a few seconds. "Don't even say it!" she demanded.

The Rainbow Lounge is one of those hole-in-the-wall strip clubs that has been around for decades. It is a dive, catering to military guys who can't make it any further off base than across the street and dirty old men and creeps from the run down neighborhood nearby. I've been to a few dives in my day, but The Rainbow is really bad. By way of example, I once went in (20 years ago) with my brother-in-law. We had a beer and the featured dancer was a pregnant lady. Not in a Demi Moore cover of Vanity Fair beautiful way, but in a, "the dancer happens to be pregnant but needs the money" sort of way. It was not a sexy sight. I can't say I have been in there in years, but the place remains a punch line with the guys at work. You know, a guy will ask, "Where can I take my wife for a really nice night out?"

Someone will say, "Take her to The Rainbow Lounge."

"After the wreck, my world just fell apart. I felt guilty, my grandfather was pissed at me, obviously, I couldn't go back to the club. Without Stephanie, I couldn't pay the rent and the lease wasn't even in my name. After about three weeks, shit just started to fall apart. It seemed like the network of friends I had from St Mary's evaporated. I had packed all my clothes into my car and basically was going to go move back in with Kathy when out of the blue, Liz showed up."

"Did you know Liz from the club or the bar?" I asked.

"No, I knew her in high school." Veronica began to sob. "She moved me in with her and her boyfriend in 3B right next door."

Liz had read about the car accident in the local paper. The story was highly controversial because, aside from the fact that two people were killed, there was some question about the EMS responsiveness. A very intoxicated and confused Veronica was able to call 911 on her cell phone, and even able to get herself from Stephanie's totaled Mustang and into the equally damaged mini-van she had collided with. The newspaper reported that according to 911 recordings, Veronica was attempting to revive the van's driver. Moans could be heard on the tape, indicating that the victim was still alive. Yet, for a number of never fully explained reasons, the EMS did not make it to the scene for over 25 minutes, in spite of the fact that there was a station less than 5 minutes away. By then, Veronica was found passed out, suffering from multiple injuries herself, and both Stephanie and the other driver were dead. When Liz saw Veronica's name and picture, she knew she had to reach out to her old friend.

"How does this get you to the Rainbow Lounge?" I asked.

"I started hitting all these places looking for a new job. The memories at the bar were just too much. I figured I could get a gig as a bartender somewhere on this side of town. It turned out that I was still a bit too fragile to be having job interviews. The bars want you to be upbeat. I was sort of out of it."

"We're you on drugs?" I asked.

"No. Not at all. In fact, since that night, I haven't had as much as a glass of wine. I wasn't the one with a drinking problem, but I just lost interest in alcohol, and never did want to do drugs." Veronica assured me.

"After about two weeks, I went to my grandfather and he wouldn't even see me. My grandmother told me he needed time. My mom somehow got on the bandwagon as if she was some morale superior to me. Fuckin' bitch. My sister was supportive of course, but she had to start school in Austin, so Liz basically supported me. It turns out that she had a friend of a friend who danced at Rainbow, and they knew from the paper that I had danced before. I know it sounds sick, but they thought I might be some sort of local celebrity, a draw to the lounge. I had no interest in dancing anymore, but at that point, I needed a job. I was still trying to figure out how I would pay doctor bills that I owe, so I said fuck it!"

Veronica told me that she had been there for a few weeks, making very little money in tips compared to what she was making at the old place. She wasn't making any accusations, but it seemed like a lot of the girls made their money after they left the stage. "Lap dances?" I asked?

"Yea, you could say that. And more." she said. "I'll fuck anyone I want, but I won't do it for money."

When she wasn't working, she spent the days trying to find a new job, but she wasn't willing to take a minimum wage job when, in spite of its shortcomings, she was at least making more than that at the lounge.

"So where does Jonah come in?" I asked.

"Jonah comes in like a knight in fucking shining armor." She said with a visible weight off her shoulders.

Jonah had come in with a guy Veronica had seen before, turned out to be a friend from the dorms on base. It was clear that the guy had brought him in to see me. This was on a weekday night so they didn't stay really late, but every set I played, Jonah spent at least $20 or $30. "Suffice it to say, I made more off of Jonah alone that first night than I had any other night at Rainbow. And he kept coming in. I don't want it to sound like he bought me, but he sure as hell got my attention."

Over the next two weeks, Jonah was able to secure Veronica's number and a date. "I told him my whole fucked up story and he never lost interest. James, he was just like you, he wanted to know more about me and my feelings. He was genuinely interested in me. God, I love this man."

"So he wasn't looking for a piece of ass from a dancer, he was really into you?" I asked.

"That's the thing. Jonah was not pushy about sex. Oh, he wanted me, that was obvious, and frankly, I wanted him too. But what I fully expected was for him to want me to stop dancing before he would officially date me. I was prepared for that kind of discussion, but he said the idea of seeing me dance actually turned him on, even when other guys were stuffing dollars in my g-string. Weird, huh?"

Suddenly, things were falling into place. I could see so much of Jonah's mental make-up in myself. In my own life, there had been countless efforts by me to get my wife to participate in an amateur night situation at a strip club. The idea of her topless on a stage with other men admiring her, fueled so many of my sexual fantasies when I was younger, and now, this guy Jonah was living the dream.

"So how long before you and Jonah are together and you leave the lounge?" I asked.

"Within a month, Jonah was getting out of the military and he had a plan to go straight into school with the GI Bill. When he met me, the school part got pushed for a semester. We got a trailer at Vail's down on Military a few blocks over from here. If you think this place is bad... Anyway, Jonah's plan was to spend as little money as possible until we knew what we were going to do. I danced for at least another 2 weeks, and he came with me every shift. He would sit back at a table and watch me, and he definitely got off on watching other men watch me. He couldn't wait to get home and fuck my brains out."

"Veronica, I know this guy - he is me." I laughed.

"Yea, I know. Just a younger version." she continued to giggle. "So after a few weeks, I called it quits and he got on at Lowe's. before long, in spite of the fact that we were pretty religious about condoms, I was pregnant with Emma. James, Does it seem strange to you that I could love Jonah so much, yet still have feelings for you?"

"Well, I..."

She interrupted. "Well it doesn't matter, I do."