I'm a gambler. Oh, not a high roller by any means, but I do love to bet on things. Once, in Houston at the Hyatt Regency, a couple of us sat in the lobby and bet on the elevators; which one would get to the top first, get down first, or if it was stopped at a floor would it go up or down. Not big bets, but bets just the same. I'll never put myself in the poor house, or lose my house for that matter, but I will bet on almost anything. Sometimes with some very surprising results.
I am also one of those men who would like to see his wife make love to another man. It is a desire that my wife has steadfastly refused to honor ("what a disgusting idea" - how can you say you love me and suggest something like that" etc., etc.) so I had resigned myself to the fact that it was never going to happen.
And then one day -----
I was sitting in the Dew Drop Inn (no kidding, that is the name of the place) with my best friend Todd and we had just watched two women enter the ladies restroom. Todd bet me a drink that the one in the green dress would come out first and, naturally, I took the bet. The blue dress came out first so I offered Todd a chance to get even. I bet him the girl in the blue dress would be asked to dance before the girl in the green dress and when Todd took the bet I got up and asked the girl in the blue dress for a dance. Todd was shaking his head when I got back to him, "I guess I fell for that one" he said, and I laughed and told him that I dearly loved to bet on sure things. He snorted and said that there was no such thing as a 'sure thing'.
I fired back with "Sure there are. The sun always rises in the East, everybody dies, the IRS always gets its money and Betty (my wife) is 100% faithful."
At the mention of Betty Todd perked up. Betty, Todd, and I had grown up together and had known each other since the first grade and at different times Betty had gone steady with both of us. After high school Todd had gone into the Marines, I had gone into the Army, and Betty had gone to college. Betty had married, become a widow, and when I was discharged we began seeing each other and eventually married. Todd came home from the Marines in time to be my best man, but he had never lost the hots he had for Betty. I kidded both Todd and Betty about his 'puppy love' but they both just ignored me. Anyway, Todd couldn't resist taking a dig at me, "You are absolutely certain that Betty is faithful to you?"
"Of course" I replied.
"You willing to be on it?" asked Todd.