Less than two minutes after they began, Kevin was already on the verge, his body tensing. Then, as it had been since Elaine could remember, it was over; far too soon for her to derive any pleasure. Though she clung tenaciously to her husband, he paused only briefly before withdrawing and extracting himself from their enfolding embrace. Then, as was his custom, he rolled over and was fast asleep within five minutes.
As she frequently did at such times, Elaine lay awake contemplating her life. Though she loved Kevin, her thoughts at these times often drifted to other men with whom she was acquainted or had seen at various functions - men who might be capable of bringing her the kind of joy she had heard other women have.
Is it my fault?
On this night, as on so many previous nights, that thought plagued her. At other times, she would conclude that women aren't meant to enjoy sex in the same way men do.
Elaine had heard that some women pleasure themselves. Her next door neighbor, Sue Jenkins, had admitted that she did - Sue's husband being about as thoughtless and inept in bed as Elaine's. Girls Elaine knew in high school used to joke about it. But her mother had told her many times that masturbation was evil and that she should never engage in such a sinful pursuit. So, Elaine hadn't.
She and Kevin met, and began dating, in their final year of college. Being from a stern conservative family, which didn't believe in sex before marriage, Elaine remained a virgin until her wedding night.
Elaine and Kevin were married in a large ceremony only a few weeks after graduation with both families and many fiends from college in attendance. It was a grand affair and everyone, including the bride and groom had a wonderful time.
The wedding night was different. Kevin was ready and eager to stake his claim and Elaine, though scared, looked forward to her first sexual experience.
With only the briefest of preliminaries, Kevin plunged in, braking the barrier that marks virgins. Once that impediment was removed, he began pumping away as if his new wife were one of the whores he had visited since he was eighteen, especially during the past year when Elaine refused to give in to him.
"I'm finally able to fuck you," he exclaimed as continued thrusting. In less than a minute, he was spent and his seed was planted in his new bride.
Elaine was too shocked by her new husband's hurried approach to reply or to derive any pleasure from their first sexual meeting.
Two weeks later, she found she was pregnant. Thus there would be little opportunity for the two to become accustomed to married life before the chores of taking care of a child would be upon them.
And so it went over the next sixteen years. Two more children arrived, but Kevin's approach to love making remained unchanged.
As her husband snored next to her, Elaine thoughts again turned to what it would be like to be with another man, a man who could please her. Though aware that such thoughts were sinful and could put her marriage in jeopardy, they nevertheless crowded her mind especially at these times she lay staring at the darkened ceiling while her spent husband slept peacefully beside her.
The only way Elaine had devised to combat these visions of other lovers, was to force her mind to concentrate on mundane matters such as what needed to done the next day or how the kids were doing at school.
Sex just isn't that important,
she would tell herself.
A woman's lot is to maintain a nice home and raise the children. Sexual satisfaction is a male prerogative.
But more and more, in recent years, she began to question that premise. Books and magazines she read, and other women she talked to, began to convince her that she was being cheated out of something which was her due.
Lovemaking with Kevin should be as rewarding to me as it is to him, at least once in a while,
she decided.
Perhaps if he could only last a little longer, or do something to get me more excited, like I've read in those women's magazines, maybe it would be different. He always seems to be in such a hurry, as if he has something else on his mind.
At times when her thoughts would turn to what she had come to conclude should be her right, her hand would involuntarily slip down to sample the wetness between her legs, and graze that little bud that felt so good when she touched it. Then her mother's words regarding self-pleasuring would come thundering back, and she would quickly yank her arm away.
Elaine's conviction, that greater satisfaction could only come from her husband, which had prevailed during the first years of marriage began to wane a few years ago. By now, it had eroded completely. The change began at first ever so slowly and only through fantasies. As she encountered good looking men while shopping or at the library, she would wonder what it would be like to have one of these strangers lying between her legs. Then there was that tall dark mechanic at the garage where they had their car serviced. Jack, was his name. Elaine, sometimes contemplated what it would he like to have Jack service, her as he did their car.
Would he be as capable of making my body hum, as he does our car's motor? Maybe a quick fling with Jack, would tell me if I'm capable of enjoying sex.
Elaine didn't desire an on-going affair. Her family was too important to her for that. She merely wanted to know if she could enjoy the ecstasy she had read and heard about. And maybe, she might be able to learn what turns her on, and perhaps be able to guide Kevin so he could learn the secret as well.
Jack might be just the answer,
she mused.
He certainly gets my juices flowing whenever I see him. And, there wouldn't be any continuing involvement with him,
But then, she thought, how awkward it would be when she had to take the car back in for service afterward. She concluded such an experience would be too embarrassing.
No, it can't be Jack,
Elaine finally convinced herself.
But maybe, someone else - just once. I have to find out!
One day not long after her latest fantasy about Jack, her next door neighbor, Sue Jenkins came over for lunch. It wasn't long before the conversations turned to each other's love life.
"Elaine," Sue began. "I've got to tell you, I finally did it."
"Did what?" Elaine replied. "You already told me you mast... I can't even say the word, but you know what I mean."
"Oh sure. I've been doing that for years, sometimes with a vibrator or a dildo."
"A dildo? What on Earth is that?"
"A fake penis, dummy," Sue explained noting Elaine's shocked expression. "They're made of plastic or rubber and come in all shapes and sizes. But, that's not what I'm trying to tell you. I finally took a lover. Actually, he's a professional."
"A professional? I know women did that but, men?"
"Sure."
"But, where, how did you find him?"
"Would you believe in the yellow pages?"
"The yellow pages? How are they listed, under 'G' for 'gigolo'?"
"No, but you're on the right track. Actually under 'E' for 'Escort Services.'"
"You mean, right in the regular phone book?"
"I mean exactly that!"
Elaine retrieved the yellow pages from a drawer in the kitchen cabinet and opened them to the 'E's. "Let's see what's listed here," she said with a snicker. "My gosh, you're right. There are at least a half dozen escort services listed. Do they really mean
that?"
"You bet your bippy, they do."
