"We need to talk." It's an old theme, like many bitches on these pages, almost beaten to death, but here we go one more time.
This is short, intended to be taken with a pinch of salt, written in proper English as the English intend it to be written. There may be errors, ghastly spelling mistakes, or maybe you just don't speak English as English should be written. Who gives a fuck? And so dear friends........
Yeah that's what she said. Fuck, I should just have walked out and left her sitting there. Everyone knows fucking nothing good ever follows those four fucking words.
Was it any different for me, you're joking, right? Of course not, stupid question. Stupid me too, because I sat and listened to the pile of utter horse-shite that she tried to deal me.
Clearly she thought I was just her loving moron who would tolerate anything because I loved her without reservation. Note the use of the past tense there. That was the case, but no longer, not after what I heard that night.
Guess what? It wasn't all bad news, at least that is what she told me, no, not bad at all, the great news was that we were going to raise a family together, grow old and ride off into the sunset together, one of us would hold the other in their arms as the other took their last breath, yes, nothing much had changed, it was true love after all.
Yeah, right and a squadron of flying pigs just did a barrel roll across our apartment in tight formation.
What happened in the next short time shouldn't impact our future negatively, it was just something that we would look back on in future years and probably consider that it had enhanced our lives, had enriched our relationship, definitely improved our sex life, made us a more rounded and complete couple.
By the way, I'm Jimmy, she's Sally and where we went to school, what we do for a living, who our friends are, how we met is none of your fucking business, I'm not going to launch into our boring backstory because... well because just like every other person's backstory bores me shitless, why would I expect you to find mine interesting?
It's not, it is run of the mill boring, almost certainly tedious, 24 years in the making, hers is one year less and not much more interesting from what little I care to remember of the details she's given me over the 4 years we've been married and 18 months before that, when we fucked like bunnies and "lived in sin", if you believe that "sin" sort of claptrap.
I'm not religious, never have been, I saw through that bollocks at an early age, how anyone takes that seriously when it is a classic route for paedophiles and those who chose to enrich themselves in a way as old as time, living on suckers trying to buy their way into paradise giving their hard earned to some lazy fucker in a dog collar. Not for me my friend, though I do readily tolerate it in friends and acquaintances, it's their choice to believe, just like Santa Claus.
I've always been an "in the now" kind of a person, I have always planned a bit for the future but Christ Almighty, what a waste of time that turns out to be. Yeah, Sally and I had plans, from family all the way through to grandkids, retirement, travelling the world, still fucking like bunnies.
Plans eh? Waste of fucking time and effort. At least the religious crazies have a good expression for that, "Man plans, God laughs". He must be as cynical a bastard as I've just become.
So, you get the picture, a dinky couple -- dual income no kids yet -but we had decided we we're about to work on changing that... then she dropped the bomb.
Yeah, we needed to fucking talk alright. Did we ever?
