So what WAS the moral of the story? He suggested several possibilities:
--Don't be a heavy drinker.
--Heredity outweighs everything else.
--You can't trust anyone, even members of your family.
--Stamina is very important.
I don't know which of these is right, or whether any of them is the best. I came up with another one on my own. Let me tell you the story, and you can be the judge.
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The business I'm in demands a lot of travel--a LOT of travel. I'm on the road at least a couple of weeks every month, and I spend more time in airports or hotels than at home in my own bed.
Fortunately I'm not a family man. Married twice, divorced twice. The first marriage ended when I came home at 11 am with a stomach flu and found Evelyn sucking some guy's dick in our living room. The second one was my fault. I just wasn't able to be a trusting guy after what Evelyn did, and I never fully committed myself to Joanne. It was my cheating that ended that marriage. No kids either time.
So life is lonely, but at least when I'm traveling I meet new people. I've had an awful lot of casual conversations in airport bars, and this was one of the most memorable.
It began in typical fashion. A guy slid onto the bar stool next to me and ordered a beer, we nodded to one another, exchanged a few ironic remarks about the weather and the joys of traveling. Both of us had a couple of hours to kill, and the conversation meandered along in a mildly interesting fashion.
We talked about business traveling for awhile--good airlines and bad ones, nice cities and awful ones--and then about baseball. He was an Astros fan, but didn't have much to brag about. I told him I'd seen Jeff Bagwell play back when he was still in the minors, in the Red Sox system.
We talked for a bit about how many airports we'd been in, how many stories we'd exchanged with strangers over the years. Idle conversation, and it seemed as though it might peter out. But I was in no hurry--there were still two more hours before my flight.
"Can I ask you something?" he said.
"Sure," I replied.
"A guy told me a story not long ago, and he asked me what the moral was. I've been thinking about it ever since and I still can't make up my mind. You feel like hearing it?"
"Why not?" I said.
"It's about a woman named Maria," he said.
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The Story
Maria's life as a young woman was shaped by one central, painful fact: her mother was a slut. Maria's mother Rosie was a beautiful and delightful woman, cheerful and full of life, kind and generous, a woman who had many friends. But she loved sex—a lot of sex—and when she found her husband wasn't able to give her as much as she wanted, she showed little hesitancy in finding other lovers who would supply what was lacking at home.
Maria's father caught his wife cheating three times; after the first two, remarkably enough, she talked him out of divorcing her. But the third time, after he walked into the bedroom and discovered her banging a 19-year-old pizza delivery boy, he threw her out of the house. Maria was only seven; and from then on she and her two older brothers were shuttled back and forth between her divorced parents, one in Miami and one in Tampa, feeling perpetually insecure and unwanted.
Maria loved her mother, but she absolutely hated what Rosie had done, destroying what had been a happy family; and she resolved that she would never let anything like that happen to her.
Despite all the usual temptations, and the begging and pleading of her boyfriends, Maria pledged to save her virginity for her husband, and she did. At 22, fresh out of the University of Miami, Maria went to work as a paralegal for a small law firm in Key West. Four months later she was asked out to dinner by a young accountant in town, one Alexander Malcolm Winters, 28, who was bright and well-spoken and on his way to being a partner in the company he worked for.
They dated for over a year, and though Maria grew to love Alex very much she resisted his attempts on her virginity as she had resisted all those of his predecessors. Their first night of love-making, in a scene more reminiscent of an old-fashioned novel than of modern-day life, took place on their honeymoon.
It proved to be a happy marriage. Alex was hard-working and ambitious, and did very well at his firm. He was also totally devoted to Maria, considering himself lucky to have landed such a beautiful and loving wife. When he wasn't working long hours he was catering to Maria: bringing her coffee in the morning, cooking breakfast on the weekends while she slept late, picking up the dry-cleaning and doing other errands whenever he could manage.
In similar fashion Maria loved and appreciated Alex. Her father had not been a man who did much around the house, even in the happy days before the divorce, and she was grateful for Alex's efforts. Her husband seemed primed to provide them both with a good life, one of security and comfort, and she did all she could to support him. They had decided to wait before having children, so Maria was on the pill and their sex life could be completely spontaneous.
She found that she loved sex--in fact, it frightened her a little how much she loved it. The loss of her virginity had been more thrilling than painful, and Maria enjoyed every one of the new things her husband--who had had several previous girlfriends--taught her in bed. Whether it was missionary position, doggie-style, cowgirl, or something more exotic, Maria found it very exciting. She went absolutely crazy when Alex went down on her, and was more than happy to provide blowjobs in return. Anal sex was not quite so wonderful, but she was willing enough to indulge Alex on occasion.
Mr. and Mrs. Winters had sex frequently, whether at his instigation or hers, and thoroughly enjoyed it. But there was one fly in the ointment, one problem that kept things from being perfect: Alex's stamina.
Or, rather, Alex's lack of stamina. When he and Maria were screwing he found himself unable to last long enough to bring her to orgasm. Sometimes it would be two minutes, sometimes six--but never long enough for the steady rhythm to build her arousal to the point where she could come. Somewhere during her climb towards orgasm Alex would be unable to hold back, and his ejaculation would bring their love-making to an unwelcome end.
Alex felt terrible that he was disappointing his wife, though Maria lovingly reassured him that it didn't matter—that she loved their sex life together. They worked on the problem, reading sex manuals and even consulting a couples therapist, but they never solved it. Alex found that he could restrain his orgasm far longer with practice, even beyond ten minutes--but only if Maria lay still. If she responded to his thrusts, moving her hips around or pushing back at him, he invariably got too excited, lost control and came within a few seconds.
The irony of the situation bothered both of them: it was just when Maria became most excited, and unable to be passive as she approached her orgasm, that his response resulted in his being unable to give her one.
Despite this difficulty, it should not be assumed that Alex and Maria were alienated from one another. They loved one another deeply, and were comfortable enough together to talk freely about the problem and how to address it. Usually, Alex licked Maria to at least one orgasm before they had intercourse--she never felt cheated, as she frequently told her husband. Or as an alternative Alex caressed her breasts and pussy after he had come, persisting lovingly for as long as it took Maria to climax.
So no one could say their sex life was bad--indeed, Maria would never have said such a thing. If she longed from time to time for a powerful, steady fuck session in which she could reach orgasm, it certainly wasn't anything she ever dwelled on. In fact, when she and her best friend Susan gossiped idly about their lives--including their sex lives--Maria made hers sound terrific.
It may be that she actually felt safer, not being completely fulfilled. She could reassure herself that she wasn't like her mother, so driven by the need for more and better sex that she wrecked her own life and the lives of her family. Be that as it may, something came along to upset her safe, happy existence.
The something was Alex's younger brother, Kenny. When Maria married Alex she hadn't yet met Kenny, who was 23 and unemployed, bumming around the West Coast staying with some of his high school friends. But a couple of years later he moved to Key West and wound up with a job on a small sport-fishing boat that catered to rich tourists.