The Long Road To Understanding Ch 10

After I left the voice mail message for Marsha asking her to meet me at Marco's on Thursday night I drank another beer and then went to bed. I had a very restless night, with dreams about getting back together with Marsha, and dreams about losing her forever. I did manage to sleep but I didn't feel rested in the morning.

That day at work I just went through the motions. I spent most of the day sitting in my office trying to come to some sort of a decision. Should I take Marsha back on her terms and let her continue her relationship with Chilly? Should I give Marsha an ultimatum? It's either Chilly or me. If she chooses Chilly what do I do? Or should I just make a clean break. That would be very painful for me but at least I would be able to keep my dignity.

As hard as I tried I didn't come to any decision and after work that night I didn't feel like going home to an empty house so I went out for a couple of drinks and dinner. After dinner I still didn't want to go home so I just drove around for a while and without really thinking about it I ended up at the Club.

There were only four cars in the parking lot, one of them a black BMW and I knew from the license plate that it was Leon's car. I debated whether I should go in. I didn't know if Chilly had told Leon about her relationship with Marsha so I didn't know what I would say to him. I had threatened to tell Leon what they were up to if Chilly didn't tell him but I no longer felt the need to break that news to Leon. If Chilly wanted to try and keep her secret from him I no longer cared.

In the end I decide to go it. If Leon brought the subject up I would discuss it with him but I would not bring it up myself.

When I entered the lounge there were one three men standing at the bar, Leon and two others. They all looked at me when I entered. The two men with Leon acknowledged me with a nod of the head but Leon came across the room to greet me.

Leon shook my hand and whispered, "We need to talk."

We went back over to the bar and I ordered a drink while I exchanged pleasantries with the others. When I got my drink Leon and I excused ourselves and moved to a table away from the bar where we could talk privately.

Leon spoke first.

"Chilly told me everything."

"She did? What are you going to do about it?"

"Nothing."

I couldn't believe his response. I wondered if Chilly had really told him everything.

I said, "You are willing to accept Chilly's relationship with Marsha? Doesn't it bother you?"

"It bothered me at first but when I thought about it I realized I was just as guilty of deception as she was. I love Chilly but I have never been able to resist the temptation of other woman. I began cheating on Chilly shortly after we got married and that nearly tore us apart. I told you about that before. Chilly had an affair to get even. It was a mess and then we discovered the Club. This allowed me to have guilt free sex with lots of different woman.

"So now I find out Chilly is having a long term affair with Marsha. Chilly said she doesn't want to leave me. She said that I could have sex with anyone I wanted, why couldn't she? Just because she only wants Marsha instead of the men at the club shouldn't make any difference."

I said, "You accepted that?"

Leon said, "It is not a matter of whether I accept what she told me, hell I am not even sure I understand it, but I decided to go along with it because I want to keep Chilly and I want to continue fucking all the fine ladies in this club. And besides, Chilly said that she might let me join the two of them for sex sometime soon."

"She said you could join them?" Marsha hadn't made that offer to me. I wonder if Marsha would go along with Chilly on that. Some how I didn't think she would.

"She said it. I don't know if it will ever happen but I would love to share a bed with two women, wouldn't you?"

I said, "I guess I can understand your view on this but I am not sure if this works for me. I am not driven to have sex with ever woman I meet. I would have been happy to just have Marsha for the rest of my life. I don't think I want to share her. I guess I need to work on this some more."

Leon said, "You have to do what's right for you. I hope it all works out."

Leon picked up his drink and walked back over to the bar. I sat at the table and tried to decide what I should do, go home, call Marsha, or get stinking drunk.

I hadn't quite decided what I was going to do but was moving in the direction of stinking drunk when I was suddenly aware of someone slipping into the chair next to me and I heard a female voice said, "Mind if I sit?"

I turned to find the beautiful face of Carla Gardner smiling at me. I said, "Please do."

"You looked kind of lonely sitting over here by yourself so I thought I would join you."

I said, "I'm glad you did."

We chatted for a while and I tried to be as pleasant as I could so that Carla wouldn't see how depressed I was feeling. It didn't work. We were talking about the nice weather we had been having when Carla said, "So what's wrong. I can sense that you are feeling down about something.

I thought I could just tell her that Marsha and I were having a small problem but once I started talking the whole story came out. Carla didn't say a word as I spoke. She waited until I stopped talking and then she said, "I sort of saw this coming. I wanted to try and warn you but I didn't know how."

I said, "What do you mean you saw this coming? Did you know about Marsha and Chilly?"

"Of course not. But it is obvious from what you have told me that you feel that you were manipulated. Marsha used you and it hurts. Remember when I told you that in most cases only one person in a couple really wanted to belong to the club. At that time I believe that you were worried that it was you that wanted to be a member and Marsha had just gone along with it to make you happy. I didn't say anything them, but I suspected that it was Marsha that wanted to be here and not you. Now we both know I was right."

"Why did you think I wasn't the one who wanted to join the club?"

"You were too worried about everything. You worried about the other women, like myself, that seemed to be trapped into being members. Those that really want to be members don't care about how their spouse feels, or about how anyone else in the club feels. They are getting what they want and that's all that is important."

"I guess you are right. I just don't know anymore."

Carla took my hand and said, "Why don't we get more comfortable?"

As she guided me out of the bar I looked around to see who was there. Leon was gone but the other two men were still at the bar. They didn't turn to look at us as we left.

We went upstairs and entered the first bedroom we came to and I immediately took Carla in my arms and kissed her. Of all the women at the club that I had sex with Carla was the one I remembered the best even though I had only been with her once. It wasn't just because she was beautiful and great in bed, there was something more. I am not sure why but I liked her. Maybe I sensed a kindred spirit. I sensed that, like me, she was in pain and trying not to show it.

As we kissed I unbuttoned her blouse and helped her take it off and then I removed her bra. I sucked on her hard nipples until she began breathing hard then I removed her pants and panties. Before I could do anything else Carla began to help me out of my clothes.

When we were both naked we stood kissing each other. Carla had her left hand on the back of my head holding it in place while our tongues played with each other and her right hand was wrapped around my cock.

When the kiss ended we stood looking into each other's eyes. It was at the moment that a question popped into my head. I knew it was not the appropriate time for the question but I wasn't able to stop myself from asking it.

"What does John want from me now?"

"What?"

I repeated the question, "What does John want from me now? You told me the first time we were together that you only had sex with someone if John wanted something from that person. So?"

"I don't know whether I should feel hurt by that or if it was somehow deserved."

I said, "Perhaps I am wrong and if I am I'm sorry. I guess I'm a little sensitive about being manipulated right now."

Carla backed away from me and started to pick up her clothes and get dressed.

"Did you see John in the bar? No you didn't, because he is not here. I decided last month that I was no longer going to be John's chattel. Something he could use to get what he wants. It is funny that it was you that made me realize that I have too much pride to let him continue treating me that way. I guess I thought that you would certainly see that I was with you tonight because it's what I want."

Carla was pulling her panties up when I grabbed her and pulled her to my chest and hugged her tightly.

"I am sorry. I never meant to hurt you. Please forgive me. I don't want you to leave. We don't have to have sex. Just stay and talk."

Carla pulled away from me and sat on the bed. She was holding her bra in her hands and didn't seem to know what to do with it.

"I guess this is partly my fault too. I should have told you that I left John while we were still downstairs."

"You left him? I thought you were saying that you had just decided that you were not going to be the sexual favors that he gives his friends. I guess I shouldn't be surprised, you did tell me that you had thought of leaving him before."

"I moved out last month and filed for divorce. I made the finale decision once I realized that I would be okay financially."

I sat next to her on the bed and put my arm around her.

"Is there anything I can do to help you?"

Carla turned to me and said, "Yes there is. Make love to me."

I took her bra from her hands and dropped it on the floor then I pulled her panties off for the second time. I pushed Carla back on the bed and climbed between her legs and pressed my mouth against her vulva and slid my tongue up and down her slit. As the petals of her sex flower opened for me I pushed my tongue inside. Carla put her hands on the back of my head and pulled me tighter against her pussy while I drove her to an orgasm.

Carla pushed me on to my back and then she climbed on top of me using her right hand to guide my cock between her pussy lips and then lowered herself onto my shaft. Carla moved her hips up and down taking my whole length inside her on the down strokes.

After a while we rolled over so that I was on top of her and I pumped my raging cock into her until I climax inside her. It was an incredible orgasm. One of the best I had ever had.

Afterward I just wanted to hold her but Carla said, "If you don't mind I would like to get out of here."

I was a little upset. Was that all she wanted from me, a quick fuck? Now she just wants to be rid of me. If that was the case why did she get upset when I asked her what John wanted from me?

We walked downstairs in silence. I don't know what she was thinking but I was trying to think of something nasty to say to her as a parting comment.

When we got downstairs Carla followed me back into the bar and asked me to have a drink with her. There were about seven people in the bar now, four men and three women. Carla didn't seem to care that everyone looked at us as we entered the room.

When we sat down with our drinks I said, "Why were you in such a hurry to get out of the bed upstairs? For a minute I thought you just wanted to get away from me."

"It wasn't you. I like being with you. It's just that as we were lying there I realized how much I hate this place."

"If you hate this place so much why did you come her tonight?"

"This is the first time I have been here since I left John. The only reason I came in was to pick up some personal belongings that I left in my locker. I would have been in and out of here in five minutes if I hadn't seen you sitting in the bar."

I laughed a little and said, "I am sorry if I held you up."

"I am glad you were here. I was hoping I would get to see you again. If nothing else I wanted you to know that I did leave John. I figured that of all of the members of this club you would probably be the only one that would be glad that I left John and was quitting the club."

"I am happy that you have decide to move on with your life."

Carla leaned in close to me and looked me directly in the eyes and said; "Now it's your turn. You have a choice to make. Are you going to get on with your life?"

I said, "I don't know what I am going to do yet. I am meeting Marsha Thursday night to talk things over. Hopefully by Friday morning everything will be settled."

"You're going to take her back aren't you?"

"Probably. I guess I still love her. Not having her with me makes it seem like there is a hole in my life. I can't leave her if I feel this way."

Carla said, "I guess I can understand that," then she took a sip of her drink. "If you change your mind you can always run off to Las Vegas with me."

I had to laugh. I said, "Las Vegas? That's where this whole mess started. Were you kidding or are you really going to Las Vegas?"

Carla said, "I need to get away from here for a while. I am flying to Vegas on Sunday and staying till Thursday. Then I am driving over to Napa Valley and tour the wine country and then up to San Francisco. After San Francisco I will drive back to Vegas and fly home from there. I'll be gone a total of three weeks."

"Sounds like a great trip."

"It will be. And I was only half joking when I asked you to go with me. It would be fun."

I said, "I am sure it would be but I have got to make sure I do what's right for me Marsha and me."

Carla said, "Well enough about that. I am going to get my belongings from my locker and head home. Why don't you come with me? I would love the company and I think you would too."

I did go home with Carla and when we got there we went straight to bed, made love and went to sleep.

I had breakfast with Carla in the morning and then I went home, showered and dressed for work.

I felt a lot better on Wednesday than I had on Tuesday and was able to concentrate on putting in a full productive day at work. By Wednesday night I was getting comfortable with my decision to take Marsha back. Actually the decision wasn't final. It kind of depended on Marsha. I didn't want to be manipulated any more. I felt that I could deal with her relationship with Chilly as long as Marsha remained honest and up front with me.

Hopefully Marsha and I would be able to work everything out Thursday night.

On Thursday as it got closer to the appointed time that I was to meet Marsha at Marco's I started to get nervous. I felt silly. Why was I nervous about talking to my own wife?

I arrived at Marco's at seven o'clock and was seated at our table immediately. Marsha came in fifteen minutes later. I wondered if she made me wait the fifteen minutes as a way of manipulating me or was I reading too much into things.

Before Marsha sat down she came over and kissed me and said, "How have you been?"

I said, "All right under the circumstances. How are you?"

"I guess I'm about the same as you. I hope we can work this out."

"I hope we can too. Why don't we get a drink and order dinner before we start talking?"

"Sounds good to me."

When we had our drinks and the waiter had our dinner order we began to talk.

Marsha said, "Have you decide what you want to do? Will you take me back?"

I said, "That depends on you. What kind of strings will be attached to our relationship?"

"Just one. I need to be able to have time with Chilly. That's the only thing I am asking for."

I said, "What about the club?"

"What about it? If you want to stay in the club I will go along with that. I don't like the club. I hate knowing that you're having sex with other woman but that was the trade off I had to make so I could be with Chilly."

I said, "Wait a minute. We didn't join the club because I wanted to, we joined because you wanted to use the club as a means to spend time with Chilly."

"That's true. I didn't want to have to sneak around sleazy motels and risk having you or anyone else find out about us. The club was the only way for me to be able to spend time with her. But it meant that I had to allow you to have sex with other woman. I know that sounds selfish but I couldn't help myself."

I said, "I have decided to quit the club."

"Okay. Whatever you want. Can we try and see if we can make it work?"

"I want to. I hope we can. When would you like to come home?"

"Sunday."

"Not till Sunday?"

"I am going to be in meetings at work until late tomorrow evening and afterward our boss is talking everyone out to dinner."

"Well then, what about Saturday? Why can't you come home Saturday?"

"I know this sounds terrible but I have plans with Chilly for Saturday. I was hoping that you and I would be able to get back together and I figured if we did that it might be quite a while before I would be able to spend any time with Chilly so we arranged to spend Saturday together."

I said, "I thought you wanted to save our marriage."

"George, please. I am doing the best I can. I want to be with you but I have to do it this way. Please understand."

I said, "I am trying to understand but I don't understand why saving our marriage has to wait till Sunday."

"It doesn't. I want to be with you tonight if you'll have me."

That comment and the way she looked at me when she said it gave me a lift between my legs.

When our meal came I decided to change the subject and talk about things less upsetting. The meal was pleasant and I was beginning to look forward to having Marsha back home with me.

After dinner Marsha followed me home in her car. Once in the house Marsha became the aggressor. She quickly opened my pants and freed my already erect cock. Marsha wrapped her hand around my cock and led me to the sofa in our living room and had me sit down. She got on her knees in front of me and ran her tongue over the head of my cock a few times and then took me inside her mouth. She slid my cock in and out of her mouth while sliding her tongue all over the head.

When I didn't think I could go another minute Marsha stopped. She got up and started removing her clothes while standing directly in front of me. When she removed her panties she pushed her hips forward offering her pussy to me. I couldn't resist so I leaned forward and penetrated her cleaved mound with my tongue. Her sexual juices were flowing and the taste was both exquisite and erotic.

When I felt that Marsha was nearly ready to have an orgasm I made her turn around and then I pulled her down onto my lap. As she sat down she reached between us and guided my cock into her hot wet sex.

Marsha bounced up and down on my lap until she began to orgasm. I had to hold on to her to keep her from falling off my lap as the spasms coursed through her body.

When it was over I put Marsha on the floor on her hands and knees and I entered her from behind. I humped into her hard and fast until I blew my seed into her.

It took us both a while to recover and when we did we went up to our bedroom and made love again.

The next morning when I woke up Marsha was gone. I found a note on the kitchen counter, which said, "Sorry I had to leave so early but I had to go shower and change and get to work, I will call you later."

Marsha did call me on Friday and told me she loved me and was looking forward to being back home with me on Sunday.

Saturday evening as I was contemplating the new relationship I was going to have with Marsha I was wondering if I could handle it. It wouldn't be much different for Marsha; she had been having things her way for the last several months. The only difference for her was that she no longer had to hide her relationship with Chilly from me. Everything was different for me. Now I had to deal with the knowledge that I was sharing my wife's love with another person. I didn't know if I would be able to handle it long term.