Chapter 2 The Fall Accelerates
At first I found it very frustrating, my cooking was crap and Anne made sure I was aware of it.
Finally exasperation got the better of her patience. "Can't you even follow a simple recipe, the books are all in the kitchen, surely it's not too much to ask that you prepare a simple meal? I don't expect anything fancy, but sausage, egg and chips two night in succession is a bit much.
The truth was, I hated it! Not just the cooking but the washing, ironing, cleaning, the whole bag. The only consolation was that I got to spend more time with John and Pamela. They were great and tried there best to help, but were mostly a hindrance. Their help usually resulted in even more mess to clean up, but the earnest look on their faces as they tried to help made me laugh.
Clothes washing and ironing proved to be a trial. Once I had figured out the difference between a hot wash and cool wash, which powders or tablets to use and fabric softeners etc, I washed the whites with the coloured with the predictable results and I never seemed to have a moment to catch breath.
This house husband was getting truly frustrated trying to keep the house and kids clean and getting the them to and from school and nursery with the appropriate clean clothing.
Then one evening after Anne had been working full time for about a month, she came home, full of herself, relating all the office politics and regaling me with tales of her working day. I have to admit, I was jealous, envious and totally pissed off. Pissed off because this particular day was my birthday and I had managed to produce an evening meal that was at least palatable only to find that she was not hungry as her boss the MD had taken her out to lunch at some up market Bistro.
I exploded. "I've had it, I don't think you appreciate the effort I went to in preparing this meal. I have been without any adult company all day, completed all the washing and ironing, tidied up the house specially and you don't even have the courteously to phone me to say happy birthday."
She looked shocked and realised that she had completely forgotten my birthday. I thought she may be a little contrite and apologise, but instead went on the attack. "Listen to yourself, I used to have to do all that and you never showed any appreciation, now the boot's on the other foot and you are behaving like a shrew. You should think yourself lucky that I have come home on time, I had an offer to go to dinner tonight and I almost accepted!"
"Maybe you should have, at least he may have struck lucky, which is more than I have lately!"
I could have bitten my tongue off when I uttered those words, but realised it was too late, they were out in the open.
"What's that supposed to mean? I have been working extremely hard to support us all and all you do is complain that I have not been spreading my legs often enough for you. The next time I am invited out to dinner, I may just accept!" She replied ominously.
With that she stormed up the stairs to our room and slammed the door. I slept in the spare room that night and for several nights thereafter. We did not speak until the weekend.
It was after the kids were in bed on Saturday when Anne approached me with a glass of wine in each hand and said. "I am really sorry that I forgot your birthday and for the harsh words I said that evening. You did not deserve to be treated that way. I do love you and I know you are finding it very hard, but so am I." She handed me the wine glass and we stood there sipping the wine and just looked at each other.
Then she said. "I miss the kids, I miss sitting with them, reading them stories and playing with them. It's hard for me too you know. I am jealous of how they respond to you, you are so much more patient with them than me and they always look to you if they have any questions. It makes me feel somewhat redundant as their mother."
As we sat there drinking our wine, we talked openly for the first time about our frustrations.