I really appreciate the comments and feedback from my first submission. Everyone was much more kind than I expected. There were a lot of great suggestions on how I can improve my writing and I have read every comment. One suggestion was that I proofread before submitting. I actually proofread my first story at least a half-dozed times before submitting. Any yet I still dropped periods in the middle. Of sentences. I have read the following story several times now, and I know that I will have missed many errors. Thankfully, there are commenters who will point them out to me.
Several people pointed out that I introduced children and then dropped them. The sad answer is that those poor kids suffered from Chuck Cunningham Syndrome. They left to play basketball and were never seen or heard from again. But seriously, those comments were very helpful. They reminded me of Chekhov's rule that if a gun appears in the first act, it must be fired in the second. In other words, if it does not add to, or move the story along then drop it. Those comments about those poor missing kids caused me to do an extensive re-edit of this story.
Harddaysknight cautioned me against using tropes such as the husband owning the house and kicking his wife out. Oddly enough, I had never questioned this in any story for the simple reason that I owned my house when I married my wife. I can see now that this is actually an unusual situation and I will be cautious about using it in the future.
I caught a lot of flak for my stance on voting and comments. Some commenters were admitted authors that were posting anonymously. I guess maybe I'm dense (or ignorant as one commenter claimed) but I just do not see how a comment by an anonymous poster on an internet forum can be so fraught with peril that the comment must be deleted. I figure that as long as the comment thread has not triggered Godwin's Law, then I'm not going to take it personally. I will admit that my background has abnormally desensitized me to barbed comments, stinging criticism, and harsh invective; so...
thanks mom!
This story is completely unrealistic, written just for fun and is 180 degrees from my first submission. Please leave feedback so that I can improve. All comments are welcome.
offkilter123
The General's Wife
Executive Offices
Ascendent Entertainment Enterprises
Hollywood, CA
Doug Showalter, CEO of AEE heard the faint "ding" heralding the receipt of a Teams message.
"Your ten-o'clock is here".
At one time, this message would have come across on an intercom. Times had changed since the pandemic. Now everything was Teams, email or Slack. Employees, from the CEO down, were not supposed to use any other form of 1:1 communication so that all communication could be monitored by the courts. No texts, and for sure no Snapchats! Not for the first time Doug silently cursed the name of his predecessor and his legacy of sexual harassment that unwound as part of the same Me-Too movement that had sent Harvey Weinstein to prison. Ascendent was being monitored by the courts to ensure it was a safe working environment for women. Safe yet profitable. Two goals that were frequently in conflict with each other. Fortunately for Doug, he was succeeding in both and sexual harassment, while not completely obliterated, was becoming less and less of an issue, thanks in no small part to creatives like his next visitor.
"Send them in, Jocelyn." Doug stood and walked around his desk. His visitor had become much too important to the success of AEE to not be met at the door. Jocelyn ushered two men through the door and into Doug's spacious, modern brightly lit office with its view of the hills surrounding Los Angeles.
"Tyler! Good to see you brother. Morning Andy," he said to the men. Tyler was Tyler Sherman, creator and show runner of the most successful scripted TV series currently airing on television. Accompanying him was Andy Daniels, Senior VP for streaming for Ascendent. Doug led them to the white leather conversation group in the corner.
"What can I get you guys? Coffee? Cola?" Both men declined a beverage so Jocelyn smiled at everyone telling them to let her know if they needed anything. Despite being beautiful, Jocelyn maintained a very professional and business-like approach to her work. But there was no way to hide the fact that she had an amazing body. Doug noticed that neither Tyler nor Andy turned to watch her rear as she left. Times are definitely changing he thought, not without some sense of satisfaction.
"So, Tyler, how are things on the ranch?" The "ranch" in question was the Straight Flush ranch in Central Texas and the setting for Tyler's most popular TV show, "The Captain." It was a highly fictionalized version of the life of Scottish sea captain Angus McQueen, who had left a sea-faring life to start a Texas ranch. At over 800,000 acres, the McQueen ranch was the largest ranch in the United States and one of the largest in the world, although there were ranches in Argentina and Australia that dwarfed the McQ, as it was popularly known. While some exterior scenes were filmed at the McQueen ranch, most of the filming was done at the Straight Flush ranch, which happened to be owned by Tyler Sherman.
There had been fictionalized stories of the McQueen Ranch filmed previously, but in the case of "The Captain,", the TV series was filmed with the complete cooperation of the McQueen family. McQ branded merchandise was flying off retail shelves and as part of their contract with Ascendent, the McQueen family had retained all merchandising rights. They were very happy with their deal and Ascendent had the most popular show on TV. Tyler had created spin-offs from the "The Captain" that had aired on Ascendents streaming service to great acclaim. They had jump-started AEE's streaming plans and gave them a major boost over the competition in the streaming wars.
"Well, we just wrapped," Tyler drawled. Despite having worked in Hollywood for twenty years, Tyler retained the speech and mannerisms of the ranch kid he was. Tall and rangy in his early forties, with square-jawed good looks, he had tried acting and despite some bit parts in movies and recurring roles in a couple of series, his acting career had never gained traction. It was when he tried his hand at screenwriting that he struck gold. Out of his first three screenplays, two were nominated for Academy Awards for best original screenplay. The screenplay that was not nominated was a film that Tyler also directed. It performed modestly at the box office but had gained a passionate following on streaming. That led to a production deal with AEE. "We just have to finish cutting the last three episodes," he said, referring to the editing process.
"So, we're on target for the premier of the first episode?" Andy asked.
"Was there ever any doubt?" Tyler ran a tight ship and everyone knew it.
"I can't wait for it to start," Doug said. "I'm as big a fan as anyone out there." He sat back in his chair and studied Tyler, who seemed to have a slight smirk on his face.
"Now what's really on your mind Tyler?" he asked.
Tyler flashed him a grin. "I'm going to need two-hundred million from you boys. Give or take."
Andy's mouth dropped open in shock. "Two-hundred million?" He squeaked. "Dollars?"