When Rick JR. was born, we had all the pictures that a normal family had taken for the occasion. I had let it slip to John that he was the father of my baby and he insisted on photos of himself with our son. I kept the copy he sent to me in my secret place along with his letter of love for me and our baby. He blackmailed me into buying him some expensive photography equipment for his new profession as a photographer, but he backed down when I threatened to come clean to Rick about everything when Rick read me the riot act about my spending. John never used blackmail on me again.
When Rick hinted at having another child, I let John fuck me without condoms and got pregnant with our daughter, Jessica. The same routine we went through with JR. was followed for Jessica. I didn't plan on getting pregnant ever again after her, but two years later after an extremely intense and physical fuck session with John, the condom broke without us realizing it and I got pregnant with our third child, Mark. They had to do an emergency hysterectomy on me to stop the bleeding from his birth and the question of birth control was answered.
Rick's behavior changed six months after Mark's birth. He began coming home late a couple of nights a week and after I had went to bed. If he didn't shower immediately, he slept in the guest bedroom across the hall from the master suite. Our sex life, even though it was still good and exciting, became less frequent. Although I was seeing John, Rick and I had always had sex three and four times a week up to the birth of Mark. When it went to twice a week, I talked with Rick about it and he said that due to stress at work, he didn't have the urge as frequently as he had before. I began seeing John twice a week after that.
Brenda, my younger sister, also began distancing herself from me about that time, but I didn't think anything of it. She was pregnant and unmarried and I thought it was because of that and the guilt from it were the reasons for her actions. After her daughter was born, she became even more reclusive; never coming to any of the family reunions or gatherings. When her second child was born it became even worse. I think I saw my sister, niece, and nephew twice in the next forty plus years.
When Rick's father died, Rick became CEO of his father's company. He started traveling out of town on business a couple of times a year for a week to two weeks in duration. We went on family vacations a couple of times a year also. I was continuing my affair with John the entire time I was married to Rick. I loved them both, but John was my true love and always would be until one of our deaths.
Rick and I fought over a full time nanny when Jessica was born and I gave in. When Mark was born, the nanny was full time during my recovery and remained full time after. Rick and I argued again about private schooling for my children, but I again gave in not wanting to push it too hard knowing the truth. When they were older, I was surprised that Rick pushed them towards careers away from business, but couldn't say anything knowing that Rick wasn't their father.
Rick became a health fanatic after his father's death and started exercising and eating better. He even stopped drinking so much at night. Rick seemed to be happy and I knew I was with everyone always commenting on what a perfect couple we were. Life was good; I had the two men that I loved both in my life and no one even suspected. For thiry years, my life was better than I had dreamed it could be when I dreamed about it those oh-so many years ago when I was a teenager.
The doctor told me I was diabetic on my yearly checkup when I was fifty two years old. He wanted me to lose weight and try and control it with that, but I hated exercise of any kind and didn't follow his advice. I had to get on insulin and my health began to deteriorate. Rick was there for me through my decline unlike my true love John who abandoned me as fast as he could when we stopped having sex together. I couldn't continue in the same routine after my health began to decline and wanted Rick to receive my sexual favors because he was my husband and I did love him. Even though I went from having sex four and sometimes five times a week to only one, I was happy and fulfilled. When Rick surprised me with the huge birthday party on my sixty second birthday, I just knew everything in my life was perfect. I had managed to have a long term affair with my true love and my loving husband never found out.
My children were giving Rick and me a big party to celebrate our fiftieth wedding anniversary and I was surprised to see John, his new wife, Brenda, and her children with their spouses. I was looking forward to it not realizing it would be the last day of my life.
P.S. The canister of slides the man I had considered my father all my life changed everyone's lives that day. My mother had a heart attack and died from the stress of seeing all the pictures she had saved chronicling her long term affair with the man I would learn was my biological father and the divorce announcement that Rick had included in his slide show. John, my biological father and who I'd called uncle all these years, had his own heart attack and died on the way to the hospital. Rick and the real family he had with my aunt Brenda walked out of the banquet hall with their heads held high as all hell broke loose around them. Rick nor my aunt or her children have answered any of my calls and my letters get returned unopened. What my mother did was wrong, but I miss my dad and want to try and make it up to him if he'll let me. I was an innocent in all of this and shouldn't have to lose my dad for something I had no control over.
Additional P.S. I'm Jessica and I found out that my dad died in Tempe, Arizona last week. I tried for twenty years to get him to see me or correspond with me in any way or form, but he never did. My brothers and I are bitter and angry at him for what he has done to us. We had nothing to do with what our mother did to him and yet he still punished us as if we did. He was the only father we ever knew and we loved him unconditionally. Now he's gone and we'll never know the truth about when he discovered mom's affair and that he wasn't our biological father. My brothers and I hope he rots in hell for his treatment of us these last twenty years.
The End