The End of the Affair

Edited by blackrandl1958

*

"She's cheating on us."

It was a pretty somber group sitting around my kitchen table. My three 'wives,' Amber, Kathy and Heather, along with their two 'husbands' Mark and Jeff. The only one missing was our other wife, Claire. She also happened to be my legal wife.

If it sounds complicated it's because it was. Polyamory wasn't as shadowy as it once was, but we were still very careful. Careers could be ruined, familial relationships strained or broken, because they couldn't or wouldn't understand. That's why we were so careful, and if one of us was involved with someone outside the group it could damage the infrastructure to the point of complete breakdown. We had rules; one of the main ones was if you wanted to bring another into the group, he/she had to be carefully vetted and the others needed to see if there was a fit. And you absolutely, under no circumstances, had sex with anyone outside the group. There were all kinds of considerations to be dealt with, one of the primary being the health of the group. Since we were all sleeping with each other in one combination or another, if one got infected with something, we all did sooner or later.

Our marriage didn't begin this way. Claire and I were married for about a year before she started talking about a polyamorous lifestyle. She left articles laying around and one day I came home to see a copy of "The Ethical Slut" on the coffee table. I read it. The woman was intelligent and articulate, extolling the virtues of that lifestyle. Then Mark, Heather, Jeff and Katie started coming around. Claire wasn't exactly pushing it, but she was hinting pretty strongly. It still took almost two years before they wore me down. I went into it with a promise from Claire that at any time I said "stop," it was over and we'd go back to being monogamous.

Jeff and Mark were bi, as were Kathy and Claire. Amber and Heather were straight, as I was, although I think Heather was thinking about it. Amber lived with us, while Kathy lived with Jeff and Mark lived with Heather. It was all mostly for appearances; bed partners were swapped weekly. Sometimes it would be Amber in my bed, sometimes Heather, occasionally Kathy, and of course my wife, Claire. I now seriously doubted she could go back.

In some ways, it was pretty good. If you wanted to do something, you knew who to call. Amber and I really liked being outdoors and we made sure we went somewhere and camped at least three times a year. She also loved to kayak and fish. We got Mark into fishing, but he decided he liked fly-fishing the best, while Amber and I would fish for anything and everything that would bite a hook. She and Mark even hunted, but I'd had my fill of that when I was young. I still enjoyed going to the range, though, for skeet and target practice.

Amber went on and on about skeet shooting, so most of the others tried it. Now it was Amber, Mark, Heather and me. They even bought their own shotguns, two over/unders in 28 gauge for the ladies, my 1100 pump, and Mark had picked up a very ornate side by side double in 20 gauge, complete with

rabbit ear" hammers. The weapons were stored at my house.

Heather was the most urbane, and she was the one who knew the trendy restaurants, where the latest gallery opening was and anything that was hot right that second. If you felt like a black-tie type of night, Heather was your girl.

Jeff loved woodworking and trade shows. I think his Lowe's card was banded with gold. I had the biggest house and property, thanks to a late grandmother, and I gave him the use of one shed dedicated to hobby and to storing his tools. The man had a lot of tools. I would help him from time to time if he needed heavy lifting. He built my dining room set, the bedroom suite for the guest room of my house and a huge armoire for Amber. I tried several times to talk him into doing it as a business, but he wasn't sure he could make a living so he wouldn't.

My wife was not the adventurous type unless it was somewhere in the tropics and included a five-star resort. Then she was all in. We did take a vacation the previous year as a group, to one of those resorts that were clothing optional and had a pretty good time. There were a few rough spots. Claire got a little buzzed and flirted so heavily with a stranger he was sure she was going to spend the night in his suite. He was a little pissed when the group swooped in and took her back to the villa.

She was hungover and apologetic. I didn't talk to her for a while and the rest of the ladies gave her hell.

"You nearly fucked up last night, girl. It took two years to talk your husband round and you nearly destroyed everything. If you need strange, then find some. Be aware if you do and we find out, you're out. No second chances. And as pissed as we would be, you better think about your husband. He'd drop you in a minute and there would go the group, so we got a stake in your behavior. Don't mess up a good thing."

She must have seen the writing on the wall and she stayed exclusively with me the rest of the trip. She apologized, I may my position clear and we put it in the past, I thought. Now it seems she hadn't.

The guy had wanted to object, but Mark is like six-three and a gym junkie, and Jeff has his own set of muscles from his hobby. I doubt either one had ever fought with anybody in their lives. I, on the other hand, was a wild-child other side of the tracks scrapper who knew when you fought the only rule was to win. I was five-eleven and 170 and none of it was fat. He kind of ignored them, but recognized something in me and backed off. I took Claire back to the room and dumped her on the bed. She was out in minutes.

I had very little to say to her for most of the next day, and the girls gave her hell for getting drunk and stupid. She never actually apologized to me, but she tried to show she was contrite. I don't think she drank more than two drinks at a time the rest of the vacation.

And now Heather thought she was cheating.

*****

"How sure are you?" She looked at me sadly.

"Not 100%, but pretty close. She's gone missing on a couple of girl's nights out. Then she started missing work, a long lunch here, leaving a couple hours early there. I checked and she wasn't with any of us. Have you noticed anything?"

"Not really, but then again she's not here that much, or with any of us for long at a time, so it could have been pretty easy for her."

Jeff asked what I wanted to do.

"Remember the last time she pulled this shit? She didn't go all the way and have sex with him but that was because we found out early enough. I think I'll call a few friends that do surveillance work. I will tell you this: if she's screwing someone on the side, I'm leaving her, and that means I'll be leaving the group. You've been her friends since long before she was with me and I won't mess up that dynamic. Besides, the lifestyle is starting to wane on me. I would have probably left before too much longer, anyway."

That shocked them into silence. It had taken them a long time to talk me into trying it, and I personally thought I was a fool for ever agreeing. I was desperately afraid I was going to lose her, anyway, and I thought maybe if we experimented for a while she'd get tired of it and it would be just us again. I was wanting to start a family and she wasn't really keen on the idea. It might be time to cut my loses.

"Don't go anything rash, Jake. We don't know anything yet."

"Her physical unfaithfulness really hasn't got much to do with it. How come any of you don't have kids yet?"

There was an uncomfortable silence before Heather spoke up. "We made a pact. None of us were going to have children until our early thirties. It made things simpler."

"I want each of you to look me in the eye and tell me why that didn't come up in conversation while you were trying to talk me into this. Did any of you ask me what I thought of waiting at least four more years before starting a family?"

The silence stretched before Jeff started. "We were afraid it would kill your acceptance of our lifestyle. Besides, Claire told us she had finally told you and you were okay with it."

"Once again, Claire lied to the group."

An odd thought struck me and I had to ask. "Tell me something. When you girls decided it was time to have children, was it going to be with your spouse, or was it just going to be luck of the draw?"

There was a very long, very uncomfortable silence that did my attitude no good at all. Finally, Heather spoke up. "We girls talked about that and decided the first one would be with our husbands. Then we thought we might share, to bring us closer together."

They all kind of drew up waiting for the explosion and I did not disappoint them. "MOTHERFUCK! SONOFABITCH! GODDAMNIT! OUT! RIGHT FUCKING NOW!"

Heather and Kathy were already halfway to the door. Mark acted like he wanted to say something but hesitated. I'd always liked Jeff best, and he thought I'd be kinder to him. "Jake, man, calm down. I didn't know you weren't in on the plan. I don't think Mark was and I know I wasn't, but I'm guessing the girls knew judging by their faces. We'll leave now and come back when you calm down."

"Yeah, I don't think so. Don't come. Don't call me. If I want, I'll call you. I'll be staying this weekend at MY house, alone. Tell Claire to carry on, I know she was supposed to be with Mark this week. When she drags her ass in, let her know the dynamic has changed. IF she comes back to me, she comes back to me. No one else. Make sure she understands. And make sure she understands that ain't written in stone."

There were a couple of gasps. I'm thinking this didn't go anywhere near like they planned. I was ready to give up the lifestyle anyway. Everybody has to live according to their own moral compass, and mine was pointing less and less towards the life I was living.

Amber didn't leave, but she made sure she stayed out of sight. I grabbed a couple of ciders and walked out back to the bench underneath the pecan tree and sat down. I was still there when it got dark and Amber opened the kitchen door, spilling light into the back yard.

"Jake? You still out there? I made dinner, honey. Please come in and eat something."

Amber was the youngest, at 22. when most of were 28 or 29. She was as sweet as could be, but she didn't graduate top of the class. In fact, she didn't graduate at all. When I found out, I didn't give her an option and put her in Adult High School. I didn't want her to have a GED, I thought it was important she have the real thing. I coached and mentored her, and the rest of the group got behind her to help out.

She was Valedictorian of her class and she thanked me by name in her speech. Her diploma hung in a frame Jeff made for her of cherry wood.

I decided I was hungry and we ate in silence. When I was done, I thanked her for the meal and asked one question. "You're the only one who isn't married in the group. Where did you stand in the Paternity Lottery?"

She looked down for a second, then gave me the look of innocence I loved about her. "I was only going to have one baby. Yours. I knew no matter what happened down the road, whether the group stayed together or not, whether you and Claire stayed together, you would never abandon your child. Or her mother."

"Why me?"

"Because you're the best of us, Jake. You're the one that looks after everybody. All the rest of the girls told me when we had girl's night that after the first baby by their husbands, you were next."

"You know if I ever sleep with any one of them again it will be with protection, right?"

A tear dripped down her cheek. "I thought as much. Let me tell you this. If you and I do share a bed again you won't have to worry. I'd never try to trap you like that. Never, do you understand?"

"Well, since we're having true confessions, I think you're the best of us. You never have a cross word to say about anyone, and even if you're the youngest you're the mother of the group. That says to me that when you do have a child that child will never have to worry about their mother taking care of them. You'll be a sabretooth among kittens when it comes to your children."

For the first time she smiled, then she got serious. "If you're the father-figure and I'm the mother-figure, we have to figure out what to do with those unruly kids."

I smiled back. "Personally, I'm all for kicking them out of their nest and see if they're able to fly on their own. I'm serious about being done with the group. I'm tired of having all of some of some things and none of one. I don't think this lifestyle appeals to me anymore. Goodnight, Amber."

I left her at the table as tears slid down her cheek. About midnight, I felt her slide into my bed. "This might be the last time I get to share this bed, honey. Will you just hold me for a while?" She went to sleep spooned to me and I lay there wishing just a little that I had met her first. Then I smiled. When Claire and I got married she was 16.

*****

I woke up to the sound of someone rattling around in the kitchen. Amber was still in my arms so it could only be one person. It was her week with Mark; why would she be here? I knew the answer as soon as I asked myself that question. She was here to do damage control.

I wondered what she would think when she found me gone. I dressed and went down the back stairs of the old farmhouse as quietly as possible, easing the door open and quietly leaving. Old houses took a lot of maintenance and I could never stand a squeaky door, so I kept them all oiled and in good repair.

I grabbed my bike, an old Triumph Mark had been helping me restore, and pushed it down my long driveway, firing it up when I hit the highway. As I rode away, I decided to take a ride on the boat, and maybe do a little fishing. We'd all gone in together and bought a big pontoon boat. It wasn't really that practical to pull it back and forth, so we rented a slip at the local marina. I topped off the tanks, checked the fishing gear to see if I needed anything, bought some fresh bait, stocked the cooler and motored off. I was going to the headwaters of the lake. There were never a lot of people there, which surprised me because the fishing was really good there.

Usually, we kept the fish until we had enough for a fish fry, but even though they were biting, this was a catch and release day for me. I stayed on the water until noon before heading back, and the first person I saw when I got back to the dock was Claire.

She was smiling, but looked scared as she tried to hug me.

"Don't."

"What?"

"Don't touch me right now."

"But you're my husband! I need to touch you."

The laugh was short and bitter. "Am I? Really? Or am I just another cock in your rotation of fuck buddies? I'm really tired of this lifestyle and I need to think. In the meantime, the best thing you could do would be give me enough space to make a decision. Please."

Yeah, that worked. Instead of giving me space she was all over me. Crying and begging didn't seem to work and I just stood there with my arms at my side until she finally stopped.

When she finally backed away, she blurted out the classic line. "We need to talk."

"About what? It's bad enough I'm sharing you with two other men and a woman, sexually, now you're out recruiting strange cock? Just how much sex do you need to feel fulfilled? Obviously, you're not getting enough at home. Or with Jeff, or Mark. Wait, maybe it's a girl you're hooking up with. It never occurred to me but it's entirely possible. Cock or Cunt? With you, the possibilities are endless."

She was reeling. I had never talked so bluntly to her or had so little regard for her feelings. She was also getting nervous. There were people around. "Please, Jake. Let's go home to talk. I'll explain everything when we get there."

I surprised her by agreeing and hopped on the bike, but instead of turning right and following her, I turned left and opened the bike up. By the time she turned around I was out of sight and I could have turned on any number of roads, so she went home to wait.

I rode for two hours and ended up in front of my great uncle's house. He was in his seventies but still pretty sharp, and he always had good advice. He came to the door, grinned when he saw me, motioned me in, grabbed a couple of beers and headed out to the back deck.

We talked in generalities for a while and then I admitted I was having marriage problems. I didn't let him in on our lifestyle, but did say I think she was cheating on me. He rocked for a minute as he thought.

"You need to find out. If she is, try to find out if it was a spur of the moment thing or a planned action. That will tell the tale. Sometimes people make bad decisions on the spur of the moment and regret their actions. And sometimes people make deliberate decisions and take chances. You need to find out if there was an affair, is it still going on, and does the cheater feel any remorse when you confront them. The trick is to find out if they're sorry they had the affair, or just sorry they got caught."

"When did you get so smart?"

He grinned. "With age comes wisdom. That and years of experience. I'm just glad you got old enough to see that."

We sat for a few more minutes in silence before he spoke again. "You know, I was married to someone else before I married your Aunt Clara. She was slipping around with two different men when I caught her, and I kicked her to the curb. Not because I didn't love her, but because what she did was deliberate. It took planning.

"I was single again for four years before I met Clara. I thought the sun and the moon rose and set because of her. Then she cheated."

That shook me. Clara had been the most loving and honest woman I had ever met. He continued.

"I guess you're wondering given my history why we stayed together. It was a drunken one-time mistake. She went with her sister to a bar for 'one drink' once while I was away. Her sister kept staying, they kept drinking and she ended up on the backseat of some asshole's car. When she realized what she was doing she tried to get him off her, but he held on until he finished and then threw her out of the car. I can't imagine the pain it must have cost her to tell me, but she did. She left and went back to her mother's house. We were separated for five months before we got back together. Like I said, it was one time, she was drunk and she told me as soon as I got home. It was rough for a while and she never had another drop of alcohol.

"She never spoke to her sister again. It seems that was a hobby for her, taking her friends out and getting them drunk enough to end up on somebody's back seat. About a month after the incident, three women jumped her and beat the hell out of her. Broke her nose, knocked out teeth, split her scalp. When she healed up, she was nowhere near as pretty as she had been before. She moved away after she healed and no one knows where she ended up."

I thanked him for the beer and the conversation, and rode home.

*****

It didn't surprise me much to see all the cars in the driveway. She must have sounded the "all-hands-on-deck" alarm. I wasn't in the mood and then realized I never would be, so I decided now was as good as any.

The only one who would look me in the eye was Amber. She gave me a sad smile and made coffee.

Heather decided to start. "Jake, we..."

"Can stop right there. You guys being here highlights the root of my problem. This was supposed to be a serious discussion between me and my wife, not between me, her and all her fuck buddies."

There was a collective gasp. Kathy looked indignant. "You don't have to be so crude; you know. We're not just fuck buddies; we're so much more. We're companions, lovers, sisters, brothers. We're there for each other."