The Cost Iou

****

Author's Note: This is my tribute to qhml1's The Cost. I thank him for allowing me to put my ending on his wonderful story.

This is more a tribute piece, instead of an alternative ending, so I've tried to stay consistent with his characters and perceived storyline. Qhml1 ended his story with the husband leaving and the marriage dead, so don't expect a RAAC! LOL!

My thanks to blackrandl1958 for instigating her impromptu "Loving Wives Legends' Day". I can't wait to read some of the offerings from so many of authors I've admired and respected.

I also need to thank her for her editing and outofshadows and Mostera1 for making this a better read. Any errors you find are mine... hell you know why.

BTW an obvious statement... this is a continuation of qhml1's story, you need to read that one first to understand this one!

****

"Les, never, and I mean NEVER, touch me again. I just did something I swore I would never do to you. I lied. I don't want to talk to you, don't want to hear you explanation or justification, don't want to hear your promises. We're done, Les. You don't know how sorry I am." He never said another word, just got into his car and left. She sat on the front steps, crying uncontrollably as he pulled away.

-- qhml1, The Cost

****

The knock at his door that night pulled him out of his morose fantasies of revenge and the tortuous thoughts of a future that could've been. Not that his reality was any better. His life was in chaos with his dreams shattered. Still, life moved on.

Kenny cracked open his apartment door and stared at her. She was completely soaked by the rain, and looked like a drowned rat. Her visit wasn't a surprise and he'd actually expected it sooner. Her life, along with her sister and father's lives, had all been turned upside down.

It had been a month since he'd confronted his soon to be ex-wife. Since then, there'd been such a whirlwind of events that he struggled to keep them all straight in his head. They were like demons escaping Pandora's Box. He'd flung that box open when he'd told Leslie he knew about her affair and that their marriage was over. The nightmare of their confrontation was burned forever into his memory.

He hadn't let her talk that night because there wasn't anything she could've said that would've changed things. She'd cheated on him multiple times and had no intentions of stopping. There weren't any words that could help soothe the burn from the things she'd stated to Jerry, or the way she'd enjoyed her affair, even if the sex wasn't all that satisfying to either of them. It was a game to them.

The fact it had been with her brother-in-law, and was such a dispassionate affair, still baffled him. She'd slept with her older sister's husband and had thrown away their marriage simply... because she could. She'd even promised her fellow cheater he could begin having her again after Kenny had gotten her pregnant.

That had been the coup de graĉe, the dagger in Kenny's heart. Even up until then, Kenny had been willing to try and salvage the marriage, but after he'd learned about the simple callous expectation of his wife to continue to cheat on him, his marriage died.

Kenny looked at his visitor and felt his heart break. Her mascara ran down her cheeks, mixed with her tears, and it made her look like a pitiful raccoon. She looked so alone, veiled in her pain and confusion. She peered up at him with pleading eyes, begging him for a reprieve from her torment.

He reached out and she fled into his arms.

"Shh," he whispered softly in her ear as she sobbed. "I'm told this nightmare will end. Someday soon, I hope."

She clung to him and bawled like a little girl who'd lost her favorite pet. Still solidly attached to his chest, Kenny guided her into the apartment and shut the door.

"Why?" she muttered through her tears. "Why?"

"I..." he said softly, "I don't know why."

He felt her slowly shaking her head as her crying lessened. She looked up at him and stared deeply into his eyes.

"No, not that," she whispered hoarsely. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Kenny stared back down at his sister-in-law. He wiped some of her tears away before taking care of a few of his own.

"Jill, I couldn't," he finally managed, his voice breaking with emotion. "I couldn't be the one to bring you that kind of pain. You didn't deserve this."

"But neither did you."

"No, but here we are, anyway."

He went to the bathroom and got her a towel. Smiling sadly, he handed it to her.

"I feel like such a fool," she said softly. "Not three weeks ago I was here, begging you to give my sister another chance. I'm so sorry, Kenny; I didn't know. Les was hysterical after you left her.

"It took a full day before Daddy could get anything out of her. She'd said you two had had a fight and she'd said and done some things that had caused you to leave. It wasn't until later the next week that Daddy heard differently. One of his lodge brothers informed him they'd heard from one of your friends that Les had cheated on you.

"When Daddy confronted her, Les confessed to the affair. She never gave any details and never mentioned who her affair was with."

Kenny sighed deeply. He knew Leslie hadn't told anyone about Jerry. She tried to call and talk to him frequently those first two weeks, but Kenny had simply hung up on her and blocked her number. After a few failed attempts to physically confront him, Kenny had sent a copy of his recording with several pictures.

Leslie had panicked and cornered him in the parking lot outside his work. It had gotten ugly. "Stay away from me, you cheating slut" he'd yelled loud enough for everyone to hear. She'd run back to her car weeping. After that, she'd stayed away from him. He figured she was hoping her secret would stay hidden longer that way. Kenny figured too many people knew, so the truth would eventually come out.

Jill's snort of disgust brought his attention back to his fragile sister-in-law. She looked like she eaten something that tasted bad.

"Two days after her confession, here comes big sister to try and talk with you and plead for her. I already knew it would be a waste of time. You'd already talked with Daddy and told him there would be no reconciliation. Jerry said you'd told him the same thing when he'd talked to you."

She paused and looked up at him.

"He never talked to you did he?" she said, wiping away a tear.

Kenny shook his head.

"I figured as much after Daddy told me about Les and him. Damn him! Now I have to question everything he's ever told me.

"You know my heart actually broke for my sister those first weeks?" she said softly as she fought back more tears. "My heart broke for you, too, but her pain was right in front of me. I knew it was her fault, but seeing her in such torment and despair, I prayed there'd be some way you could forgive her. Now, I hope she suffers every day! I suppose that makes me a bad person, right?"

"No," Kenny said gently, "just a deeply wounded one. I won't tell you I don't feel the same way. I hope she hurts, as well. I don't feel the same pain and rage I did when I first found out, but it's still there. Hopefully, someday, I'll be able to get past it but there will always be a horrible scar."

"How could they do that to us?" she whispered, then buried her head into his chest again and silently cried. After a few minutes, she became very still. Then in a very small voice she spoke.

"You know you could've told me. It would've been better hearing it from you rather than finding out the way I did."

"I'm sorry, Jill, but there is no better way to find out the one you love has betrayed you. And even worse, they betrayed you with someone you loved and trusted in, your own family. Besides, I knew you'd find out soon; too many others knew about it to keep it hidden for long.

"I figured many of our friends would know why we split up very quickly. Then, other things happened that were even more obvious. In the end, how did you find out?"

"Daddy told me. It almost killed him to do it, but he was finally able to."

"That makes sense. Your father always was smart. I knew after my run in with Jerry at the lodge, he'd put it all together."

"Run in?" she snorted and wiped her nose on her sleeve. "Daddy said it was more like an ass kicking!"

"Well..." He smiled.

"Well, the bastard certainly deserved it," she said still trying to dry herself. "Kenny, you wouldn't happen to have anything dry I could wear would you?"

"I'll find something, but it'll probably be way too big."

"I don't mind as long as it's dry."

He found her a pair of his sweatpants, socks and a sweatshirt. She took them graciously, dropped the towel on the chair and went to change in the bathroom. While she changed, Kenny sat back in his chair and thought back to his one and only meeting with his soon to be ex-brother-in-law.

Jerry had recently been invited to join the lodge again. He'd turned down a couple of invitations in the past and now Kenny suspected he knew the reason. It was apparent that banging his sister-in-law was more important than trying to impress his father-in-law.

After his confrontation with Les, Kenny wanted to make sure he minimized any further contact with either of them, so he'd requested Jerry's invite be revoked for personal reasons. He'd refused to give specifics to the membership committee but informed them that if Jerry joined, he'd resign. Jerry's invitation was quietly rescinded.

When Burt told him the news, Jerry didn't take it well. He confronted Kenny at the next lodge meeting.

Kenny wasn't sure if it was Jerry's arrogance, or stupidity, that led his brother-in-law to publicly confront him at the weekly meeting. He figured Jerry evidently didn't think he'd expose his part in Kenny and Leslie's divorce; he was wrong.

Jerry began yelling at Kenny and making a scene. He accused Kenny of taking his divorce out on the rest of the family. When Kenny turned to leave, Jerry made the mistake of grabbing his arm. The rest was a blur in Kenny's mind.

Kenny's response had been swift and vicious. He remembered hitting Jerry several times and even yelling "sixty-nine this you piece of shit." Kenny even had a vague recollection of being pulled off a then bloodied Jerry who was lying helpless on the floor. Of course, Kenny was still able to land several kicks into Jerry's balls before he was completely pulled away.

Naturally, his father-in-law had witnessed the whole thing. He wasn't surprised Burt had figured it out quickly. What did surprise him was that he was never arrested. In fact, the police never even visited him after one of his lodge brothers had driven him home.

"You know he was in the hospital for three days," Jill's soft voice stated, bringing him back from his thoughts.

"Hmm?"

"I said, Jerry was in the hospital for several days. They thought he was going to lose one of his testicles."

"Too bad he didn't. I am surprised I've never been questioned by the police."

"Why would they do that?" she said, grinning knowingly, "Daddy said Jerry was mugged outside the lodge and there were several witnesses."

Kenny looked confused. She tried to smile back at him sweetly. She was wearing his sweats and they were so big they swallowed her. She looked like a little girl playing dress up.

"Daddy told me that after you left, my pig of a husband came to and wanted to call the police. Daddy's response was to kick him in the balls a couple more times. When Jerry came to again, Daddy told him several of the lodge brothers had seen him get mugged out in the parking lot.

"Daddy told him he'd better run after he got out of the hospital. He warned him there also better not be any police involved, or there would be lodge brothers coming after him. Apparently, Jerry believed him since he moved out yesterday. That's when Daddy told me who my baby sister had cheated with."

Jill began to cry again. Kenny wrapped her in his arms and held her. She felt warm and he could feel her soft body press into his. The fantasy of carrying her to his bed flooded his thoughts. It wouldn't have been revenge sex, at least not for him. Jill was a very special woman. She was kind and generous, easily the best person Kenny had ever known. She wasn't as pretty as Leslie, but she had an inner beauty that more than made up for it.

Kenny knew he loved her, but not in the same way he'd once loved Leslie. Still, if they were to end up in bed together, it wouldn't be sex, it would be making love.

Stop right there you ass,

he chided himself.

That's right, take advantage of someone you claim to love who's vulnerable and in pain. Hell of a way to show her how much you respect her! Maybe someday we'll get together, but not now, not with all this going on

.

Kenny sighed, realizing any future relationship with his sister-in-law was very unlikely. There would be too many memories and way too much baggage.

Soon, Jill had cried herself out and silently let him hold her. He felt her sigh deeply and felt her instinctively squeeze him intimately closer. Suddenly, she released him and took a small step back.

She stared up into his face with surprise and embarrassment. He chuckled softly and assured her it was okay. Giving her a chance to gather herself, he reached over a grabbed her discarded towel.

"I must look a mess," she said, taking it from him.

"Yeah," he replied, smiling brighter, "but a beautiful mess."

She snorted and quickly covered her mouth. They both laughed.

"But not as pretty as my sister, right?" she said softly.

"Jill, I ..."

"No, Kenny," she said firmly. "I know what I am. I'm a cheated on wife, whose husband had an affair with her prettier, younger sister. I'm just a worn out childless housewife, used up and not even thirty-five years old yet."

"Bullshit," He snapped. "You are one of the most incredible women I've ever met. It's not your fault... our fault, we married such pathetic excuses for spouses!

"Jill, I know exactly how rejected you feel right now. It's haunting me, as well. However, you are something special. You give and give and I know you feel empty right now, but you aren't. Even if Jerry was too blind to see it, there are lots of other men who will. Many probably already do."

"I feel like I've wasted so many years on Jerry," she said sadly. "Kenny, you know it was because Jerry said he wasn't ready that we don't have children yet?"

He nodded.

"Damn, I feel like a fool," she said with a sneer. "I feel like I threw away my youth for... for that ass!"

Kenny couldn't help but think he'd married the wrong sister. It was a thought that had crossed his mind several times the past month. Slowly he shook his head in regret.

"Hang in there, beautiful," he gently encouraged. "There's going to be a line of guys waiting to ask you out before this is all over."

"You really think so?" she whispered. "You're not just saying that to make me feel better?"

"Well, I do hope it makes you feel better, but it's still the truth. Jill, think about it, an attractive, early thirties divorcee with a heart of gold? Priceless!"

This time, she slowly stepped into his arms and buried herself back into his chest. Through her soft sobs he could make out the occasional muffled 'thank you.'

"Of course," he said gently, leaving the thought hanging.

She quickly looked up at him in alarm. She peered into his eyes searching for a hint of what he was about to say.

"Of course," he continued grinning. "You'll need to lose the 'drowned raccoon' look."

Her laughter was like a soothing balm for his own wounds. They held each other, two wounded souls clinging to each other. Each finding safety and comfort in the arms of someone who loved them.

****

They say time marches on, and Kenny found it to be true. Some days it marched slowly, other days quickly, but most days it seemed to march right over him.

With her and Jerry's secret exposed, it didn't take Leslie long to change her tactics concerning Kenny. Gone was the fear of her family and friends finding out what had happened. Most either suspected or knew the reason behind the divorce, so there wasn't a reason not to aggressively chase after Kenny.

It was quickly evident that tactic was a bad one. Kenny's responses got uglier and louder with each attempted confrontation. Soon, Leslie was languishing in a hell of her own making. The loss of Kenny was devastating, but she knew she'd been the one who threw him away. She knew she was also guilty of betraying her own sister. Her guilt and remorse was overwhelming.

She was at a loss, trying to find a way to begin restoring those relationships. She'd started fighting the divorce at first, but with the lack of support from her family and friends, she soon realized the futility. Her despair and the hopelessness began turning into frustration.

Kenny still kept in contact with Jill and they spent many nights with one or both crying on the other's shoulder. Jill was the only one Kenny would talk to about Leslie. Part of that was because Jill needed someone to talk to, and Leslie's betrayal had devastated her almost as much as Jerry's had. The other part was he needed someone to talk to, as well, and Jill knew the pain he was going through.

Jill informed Kenny that Leslie had apologized to her at least a dozen times since the affair had been exposed. Kenny didn't ask, but Jill conveyed some of the excuses her little sister had given. Basically, Leslie had said that she'd acted like a spoiled bitch. She'd cheated with Jerry because she wanted what Jill had and she never imagined Kenny would ever leave her. After that first time, it was the excitement of doing something taboo that kept them meeting together. Jill said she'd accepted Leslie's apologies, but told her they were no longer sisters. That relationship was dead. Now, there was very little communication between the two.

She'd also told him Jerry had moved out but was constantly calling her, trying to repair the damage. Jerry had said the same thing as Leslie, that he never thought Jill would leave him.

Even with the evidence Kenny had given her, Jill said she was still torn and wasn't sure she could go through with the divorce. She still loved Jerry, and the thought of being alone scared her. However, she couldn't get over the fact he'd had an affair with her sister. At that time, she still refused any reconciliation.

The whole situation was devastating to their father. Burt had tried to be supportive of both his daughters, but Leslie's betrayal of her sister was impossible to overlook. He decided to make Jill the priority, but try not to neglect Leslie. It was far from ideal but worked most days.

Burt and Kenny regularly talked, as well. Usually, it was at the lodge each week. Burt was careful not to talk much about Leslie, but focused mainly on Jill. Both men were concerned she might actually take Jerry back.

Several weeks later, Kenny was surprised when Burt informed him Jerry had signed the divorce papers and disappeared. When his father-in-law described to him the circumstances surrounding Jerry's decision, Kenny couldn't stop laughing.

"You're kidding right?" Kenny said, holding his aching sides.

"God's honest truth," Burt said smiling.

"How could you really pull that off?"

"Well with a lot of luck," his father-in-law laughed. "That, and let's face it, we weren't dealing with a guy that's ever been considered the sharpest tool in the shed!"

Both men chuckled at Burt's description of Jerry. Kenny had heard Jerry had moved to the Hideaway Motel over on Fifth after he got out of the hospital. Not surprisingly, he was living in Room 69. Well, that's where he used to be staying.

"Even with that," Kenny grinned, "it must've taken some serious planning."

"Not really. One of our lodge brothers happens to be the uncle of the man who owns the Hideaway Motel. As long as we paid for any damages and didn't hurt him too badly, he was fine. Of course, someone slipped him a few hundred as well.