Elaine: I grew up in a home without much affection or supervision. My birth was a surprise for my parents who had just shipped my sister off to college and thought that they could finally relax. I suppose I acted out and partied to get attention but they were just tired and left me alone. My friends weren't the best influence either. I started having sex at fourteen and liked the attention I got from it.
In high school I was the slut. I changed boyfriends more than most girls changed their shoes. The only thing that got me into college was my diving. Once I got to college I stopped all the partying and worked hard on my grades but I was still the slut. I didn't want boyfriends, just a quick fuck.
That all changed when I met Phil. He came to a swim meet with his friend who was dating my roommate. We rode back to school together and talked the whole way. He was the first guy I ever interacted with who didn't try to get into my pants almost immediately. I guess he hadn't heard of my reputation. He said things that made me laugh and things that made me think. It was the longest conversation with a guy I had ever had. For the first time in my life I was really impressed by a man. As he was being his charming self I actually imagined for a minute what it would be like to have an actual boyfriend instead of a fuck-buddy but quickly realized that I was being foolish. I was way too busy with diving and school to invest time in a guy, no matter how cute and charming. Fuck-buddies were easier and didn't interfere with my plans. I also figured he would ask around about me and find out how easy I was and decide not to bother so when he asked me out I turned him down.
A few months later I got hurt, lost my diving scholarship and had to get a job to pay for school. One day he came into the diner where I worked and asked me out again. This time I said yes before I had a chance to over-think it. There was a pretty good chance he had heard about my reputation and wanted to score but I took a chance. We went out on a few dates and he didn't make a move at all! He just gave me a quick kiss goodnight. After our third date I had to make a booty call just to get laid. What was wrong with this guy?
On our fourth date though, wow. We went back to his place after dinner and he rocked my world. I had fucked thirty or so guys but I had never had a man make love to me. He started slowly taking my clothes off and kissing every inch of my body. When he laid me on his bed instead of climbing on he took me to the brink of orgasm again and again with his fingers and tongue until I was panting and begging him to fuck me. When he finally entered me he gazed into my eyes and for the first time I truly felt special and loved. My orgasm was life changing. I knew this was the man I wanted to marry and have babies with, something I had never really considered before.
Letting all my buddies know I was off the market wasn't easy but I was hooked on Phil and stayed faithful which was another first for me. When I found out his parents were rich I was determined that they wouldn't think I was after his money. I set out to be the best girlfriend a guy ever had. Before long I was being the best fiancée ever and then the best wife. I truly loved my man. We had so much fun together no matter what we were doing, finished each other sentences, laughed at the same jokes, enjoyed working out and made love every day.
Then things changed. His business grew and we decided I would quit work and start a family. I was so excited to be a Mom and was determined to make sure my children always knew how much I loved them but we received devastating news. I was infertile. This destroyed me. All of a sudden I felt like I was useless and less of a woman. Everywhere I went I saw mothers with their children and I began hating myself. I was useless. What man would want a worthless woman who couldn't even give her man a child? I started to worry that Phil would leave me for a real woman who could give him what I couldn't.
