As was the case for several days after returning from the cabin, for a period of time following Cedric's departure for school my wife Jill and I couldn't keep our hands off each other. It was a mixture of what I can only describe as loving and animal lust, left over from what we'd done, and I believe a sort of coping mechanism. There was lots of talk during sex and otherwise about our recent experiences with Cedric. Then, about a week later, the excitement kinda wore off. The sex, while no less frequent, was more loving and about us, with less and less mention of anyone else or fantasy talk. And finally, there'd be a day or two here and there where we stayed close but otherwise left each other alone. Break time of the mind and body. Well, we didn't completely leave each other alone, but we kept our heads. Just for a few days. And it wasn't something we acknowledged, we just did it. Jill would stay late at the office one night perhaps, or I'd be in and out and miss dinner. After a night or so of crashing early though, we'd usually cave and instigate some fun.
After about a month we were well seated back in our usual routines. So I was pleasantly surprised when Jill told me that for some reason she couldn't put her finger on, part of her was still basking in the same sort of afterglow we both were in the days immediately after Cedric left and after each visit to the cabin. Nothing in particular, she said. Just a feeling, and she wondered if I felt it also. She brought it up one night as we lie in bed.
"Nor does it have anything to do with anyone, except you perhaps," she said, looking at me.
"Hmm," I pondered. "Jill I kinda know what you mean." I took her by the arm. "Maybe because we've just plain done more. We had another experience, with someone else. Someone very different. Younger and...this sounds terrible but, under our control?"
"No I know what you mean," she said quickly.
"Mm, and maybe since it was at home this time...and because we're so open and honest and in tune with each other," I said, meeting Jill in an instinctive and quick kiss, "we're feeling more comfortable with ourselves is all. Sooner than before. And I don't think in an ignorant way, intentionally or otherwise. Jill I feel as good about you and us as I did the day I accepted your proposal."
"Hmmm," she smiled. "My proposal..." She moved in on me with bedroom eyes and a whispered "I was gonna you just beat me to it." And then we made out, passionately. All joking aside, when our kiss ended Jill looked relieved to hear what I was saying and placed a hand over mine. But, she'd innocently and unwittingly sparked it. All of a sudden I was hit with a wave of images of her, with Harvey and Kane and Cedric, and I felt my heart beat increase. Jill tilt her head and stared at me, blinking.
"You got that look on your face. Are you-?"
"Imagining you? Yes."
"With..."
"With all of them."
Jill's shoulders rose as she took in a sudden but small breath through her nose and exhaled it just as quickly.
"You and your beloved Kane," I said. She relaxed and gave me a smirk. I kept a straight face as I met her gaze. "But...mostly...you and filthy, gluttonous Harvey." Jill looked longingly at me once more. "You with young Cedric," I added. "I'm thinking of all of us, taking turns with you."
"'Us'? You mean, you too?" she asked, snuggling closer to me. I nodded. "Louis honey I like when you include yourself in our fantasies. I know what they're about, but when you're not only just there in them, but with me too?"
"Yeah?" I asked softly.
Jill nodded.
"Me too."
"Really?"
I nodded. And we kissed, then gazed into each other's eyes for a moment.
"But mostly..."
Jill grinned at me. "Mostly, yes...let's hear it."
I chuckled and continued. "But mostly, it's those three having you. In ways they have."
"Hmmm," she replied, as if deciding on it. "I understand."
There was a moment of just our breathing. I thought of Jill's response: "I understand"?? I was suddenly very turned on by the notion. By the many implications of her words, even the ones I knew probably weren't true. Jill likely simply meant, she wasn't gonna jab me one for being my usual crude self. But I was turned on. It showed.
"Louis, baby... I love how you look at me sometimes." She caressed my cheek with one hand and reached down with her other, running it over my crotch. "Love meee," she whispered, straining to plant a kiss against the corner of my mouth. Chills ran up my spine and I shivered.
"Aw...did I make you do that?" she asked, blinking at me. In one motion I scoot her entire body beneath mine and braced on my elbows, looking down at her. Again Jill had the same loving, so-happy-at-my-reaction laugh, but she quickly got serious, staring up at me.
"Like that," she said. "The way you're looking at me still. Thinking about me?"
I nodded and kissed her nose.
"Me an-"
"Just you," I whispered as I entered her.
Jill took in another sudden but deep breath, and before letting it out attacked me, pulling me down by the neck for a deep kiss and exhaling it all into my face with the most beautiful sounding moan. I loved her as she'd requested of me. We loved each other, slowly, in the moonlit room before falling asleep.
I did so feeling very glad and optimistic about us, and by Jill's willingness to always at least talk it up with me. That would always be good enough. Sometimes it was better than others. Sometimes, like that night, it came up and just as quickly disappeared.
It came up again one weekend morning not long after. We'd just completed a workout and I had come back upstairs with a fruit smoothie Jill requested. She must have been feeling frisky. I noticed she got that way sometimes after exercise. She was kicking off her sneakers, and began undoing her shoulder blade length, dirty blonde hair from the ponytail it'd been in as she walked toward me, a crooked little grin and a gleam in her eye: just slightly shy of 5'4" and 110 lbs of perfectly sculpted, and at the moment very sweaty woman I was so fortunate to have in my life. At 41, Jill looks, feels, smells and moves like someone ten years younger, and often passes for her kid sister who
is
ten years younger and also looks younger than she is herself. And then there's her smarts and loving heart, both seemingly boundless in their capacity, and their ability to further enrich my life every day since we first met.
I set Jill's smoothie on the bench.
"Hey," she said, wrapping her arms around me.
"Hey stinky."
Jill leaned close and breathed in deep through her nose. "Sure it's not you?" she said, looking up all serious in the eyes but still smirking.
"Probably is... With you it's a good stench," I grinned.
"Stench??" she said, smothering her face in my admittedly still wet t-shirt. "Mmm, I like your stench better than mine."
"Well I like
your
stench better then
mine
."
We grinned at each other.
"You know I got a while before I need to go out," she said, pressing into me as we held knowing eye contact.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
"Oooh," I said, biting my lower lip. "Have some ideas on how to spend that 'while.'?"
Jill nodded as she stepped on my shoes to get higher and began kissing at my neck.
