We were sitting at the kitchen breakfast table on this Saturday morning. My wife of twenty-five years, Lynn sat to my left as we faced the window. My coffee was beginning to cool since we already finished our breakfast. But I was done reading the news online on my tablet computer, when out-of-the-blue, she asked the question.
Squinting and narrowing my eyes, I looked outside, scanning the back yard as if searching.
"What are you looking for?" Lynn asked when I didn't immediately answer her.
"The marksman with the Martian Slut Ray," I replied.
"What do you mean, 'Martian Slut Ray'?" she responded, now sounding irritated. "All I asked was whether you've ever thought about having sex with another woman?"
"Well, nothing changes without a reason or something which stirs the pot," I answered in a calm tone. "So, before we go further, I'm trying to find whatever it was that stirred your pot and made you ask. I don't think I've changed lately in any way. Are our sex nights becoming routine and boring you? Is sex twice a week not enough? Was there a drug in your coffee this morning? Or are you taking other drugs without telling me?"
"I'm not on drugs!" she insisted.
"Okay then," I went on. "Have you been watching some chick flick or a TV series planting the idea that extra-marital sex is a good idea? Or has your sister asked you to try this as her 'wingman' on a Girl's Night Out? Did Darla say,
'Let's get wild tonight, pick up a couple of guys, and get a hotel room for a good fucking!'
Is that what you two planned this evening while I'm out playing poker? Has Darla cheated on Frank before this? Should I tell Frank what his wife's been doing?"
"NO! Don't you dare say anything that might screw up my sister's marriage," she replied, now seeing that this wasn't an easy conversation. "This has nothing to do with Darla. I just asked a simple question. Now you're going off searching for conspiracy theories! What's wrong with you?! You're acting paranoid."
"Well, you haven't been watching any new romance series lately that I'm aware of," I pointed out. "We've been binge watching the same long seven season series in our free time for the past two months. So, if it's not drugs, Martian Slut Ray, Darla or some other girlfriend, or a chick flick which made you change, then SOMETHING made you think of asking. ... Are you having an affair?
"You watch porn and read erotic stories!" she exclaimed. "So, I know you're looking at other women. I just asked the question of whether you ever think of having sex with them, because it's obvious you do think of sex all the time!"
"Just because I enjoy that genre doesn't mean I actually WANT to do it with another woman," I explained. "I can fantasize about tying you up and having sex anyway I want with you. But that doesn't mean I'm going to do it!"
"But I've seen your search history on the websites," she said, "and you often look for two men on one woman. Do you think about sharing ME with another man?"
"NO!" I insisted, almost shouting it. "I'm not sharing you with another man! But you're spying on me, checking my computer. Did you find any e-mails or anything where I've contacted another woman? Or have you hired a private investigator to follow me?"
"No!" she said dismissing the idea. "Sometimes your tablet computer is handy when I want to look up a recipe or buy something online. And you haven't changed your password in years. So, I use it and usually find a browser tab open to a porn site or erotic story."
"I'll be more careful to close out those browser tabs in the future," I noticed. "I wouldn't want you to get the wrong idea."
"But that's why I asked," she went on, dragging me back to her original question. "You obviously read and watch women in those sex scenes. So, you must want to be there with them! You either want to have sex with other women or you want to see me with another guy. Would you find it exciting, seeing me being fucked by another man?"
"I'm not a cuckold!" I insisted. "You're my wife, and I won't allow any other man to fuck you!"
"Then you must be fantasizing about being with another woman for a threesome to happen," and she again mentioned another woman. "One you could share with another guy!"
*****
I would be lying if I said I haven't thought about it.
I'm a guy, and we like sex! That's just a fact of life with any healthy male libido. I'd love to wake every morning with a woman's lips wrapped around my morning woodie, bobbing her head on my hard pole as she makes me cum in her mouth. Afterall, isn't that really why any guy gets married, to have a steady piece of ass in their bed every night?
I am a realist, and I know my wife doesn't want to do it very often. I've tried rolling her over in the mornings a few times to fuck with my morning wood. It's obvious just that one or two minutes annoys her, because she rolls over in a huff after I've finished quickly going back to sleep. And if I ever asked her to blow me, how could I ever kiss a mouth if I cum in it? That's just gross!
She's my wife, and the mother of our kids! Having and raising those kids took its toll on her energy, and our relationship when the kids were younger. She lost the excess baby weight every time and tightened the stomach sag, so she still looks hot. But we just grew apart.
However, something must have changed recently for her to ask this question this morning about me wanting another woman, and that worried me. I've been meticulous for at least the past year, giving her my full attention twice per week thinking that's more than enough for her. I take Viagra every Monday just before we go to bed and that gets me up to do her, most of the time. Thursdays is toy-time when I get to explore her vagina and play with her using a vibrator to give her a leg-shaking orgasm.
I'm not pressuring her to be more adventurous in bed. I'm very careful to not make her feel like a whore. I don't want her to just lay there beside me, waiting to attend to me for my personal pleasure. If she wants sex, I want her to enjoy sex WITH me! And we're married, so my wife can only enjoy sex with ME!
Her question this morning, asking me if I wanted to try another woman just caught me off guard, and this conversation was getting out of control. I was feeling like this was a trap closing. I needed to deflect her from this extra-marital sex discussion!
*****
"Now that you've stirred this pot," I said, "maybe it's time we both go deeper into the cesspool. People can have fantasies without ever really wanting to act on them," I pointed out calmly, but I thought I might turn this around by turning the question back on her. "You sometimes watch a romance movie about a married woman having an affair. Do YOU want to have an affair?"
"I never said I WANTED an affair, just because I watch a movie like that," she replied.
"If you think because I watch or read about those MFMs that means I might want to do it, then back at you. ... Or have you already had an affair? Who is he? Have you already fucked him?" I asked, now trying to put her on defense.
"Are you accusing ME of having an affair?" she asked. "Have you had me followed or seen any evidence of me being with another man? Have you checked my cellphone to find any texts or calls with another man?" She picked up her cellphone on the table beside her, swiped the screen and entered her unlock code to open it, then handed it to me. "Here! Check my texts and call history! Tell me if you see ANYTHING out of the ordinary that would suggest I was seeing another man."
"I know your cellphone history through the monthly bill online," I explained, pushing her phone back to her. "I know who you've been calling and texting. I don't need to look at your phone to know what numbers you've contacted. And your calls are mostly to the kids or family and friends I know."
"So, you have been spying on me!" she responded.
"No, it's just part of paying the bills," I said, but it was only a little lie. I didn't really need to look through the lists of outgoing or incoming phone numbers on the monthly statements, cross checking them with the ones in her contacts. I just looked in case I might someday find anything ... interesting.
