Stud Fees

How did it all go wrong? I'm writing this in a London hotel room. It's Sunday 6 March 2005 and I'm going to write down the sorry tale of what's been happening to me over the last year or so. Some of you may be sympathetic, others won't give a damn, but I'm writing this for myself anyway.

Once I've finished I'll read it back to myself and then decide what I'm going to do. Of course there are a number of options open to me, but I'll make my decision later.

All that remains now is to begin. I have the vodka next to me, silent, non judgemental, oblivious. So… I'll pour and set to work.

***

My wife Kerry, and I have been married for 15 years. I was 25 and she was 20 when we tied the knot. Blissfully in love and with our whole lives ahead of us we stepped out of the church on that glorious summer afternoon in 1984.

The years passed and we were very happy together. I never found the need to stray, I never felt the need, and I know that Kerry was the same. We loved each other, and our love grew and blossomed with each passing year. We'd decided very early on in the relationship that children weren't an issue. We decided I would concentrate on my fledgling company, and Kerry would pursue her career as a flight attendant.

And so it was.

Then - inevitably, the cynics may mutter - Kerry reached her mid thirties and things began to change. She looked at her sister's growing family, 2 boys and another due any time, and she began to wonder.

Of course that wonder altered and turned into something else. At first Kerry was wistful and I would catch her in unguarded moments gazing at her nephews with a distant look softening her pretty face. She would look at me, sadness lightly brushing her face and I soon realised that Kerry was broody, that she wanted kids of her own.

I broached the subject one evening as we sat in our comfortable kitchen, the first bottle of red despatched and the second freshly opened. 'Do you wish we'd had kids ourselves Kerry?' I asked directly. I pretended to study the ruby coloured liquid in the tall stemmed glass.

'Well… …we did decide,' Kerry began, but I cut her short.

'Yeah, I know we decided all those years ago, …but… what about now…?' I put my glass down and reached for her free hand. 'I've seen the way you look when Sarah's boys are playing… you go all dreamy eyed… So…?'

Kerry set her glass down and placed her hand over mine, squeezing me with affection. 'Well yes,' she replied quietly. 'I would like a baby. I'm 35, perhaps its time…'

Her voice trailed off and she looked into my eyes. 'Ok,' I said softly. 'If that's what you want my darling.'

I stood, ignoring the wine and I motioned for Kerry to come with me upstairs to the bedroom, the moment was perfect for us to make love despite the fact that my beautiful wife was still taking the pill. A bit of practice at baby making wouldn't hurt. She could throw her pills away in the morning, but I wanted her now. I wanted to show her how much I loved her, how much I wanted her to have whatever she set her heart upon. She wouldn't be getting pregnant tonight, but she would be getting the same intense love from me at the moment I came, the moment I flooded her body with my thick, hot seed.

Kerry followed me upstairs and I paused to kiss her mouth when we reached the landing outside our room. We kissed softly at first, a few quiet moments with our lips pressed together and I felt the spark of my lust for Kerry burst into flame. I ran the palms of my hands along the sides of Kerry's voluptuous body. I felt her tiny waist, and was delighted when I felt her body widen as I ran my hands lower over her broad hips. Kerry wasn't a tall woman; only about 5'3 and her body possessed a ripe voluptuousness that never failed to excite me whenever she revealed her curvy figure to me. Her breasts were heavy but still firm, and her thick, proudly erect nipples were surrounded by their light areola.

She has always worn her fine, flaxen hair long and it hung in a silken curtain down the length of her spine. I loved it when Kerry dressed in her work uniform and wore her hair pinned high on her head. The severe cut of the uniform accentuated her big bust, tiny waist and broad hips, and I had ruined more than a few of her skirts over the years when I'd fucked Kerry in her work clothes. Right now however she was dressed in a light summer frock, her limbs tanned, and the upper slopes of her fine breasts were sprinkled with a light dusting of freckles from the sun.

I ran my hands down around behind my wife and held her padded buttocks in both palms kneading her flesh and savouring their springy softness. Kerry's bottom is a delight to behold in its naked glory, round cheeked and substantial, and I loved to cover the soft globes of her arse cheeks with soft kisses. Kerry adored it when I paid a lot of attention to her bottom, and wasn't averse to me probing at the rosebud of her anus with my tongue from time to time.

I kissed my wife with more urgency, her lips parting and allowing my tongue to search for hers. I pulled up the hem of the cotton dress and massaged her buttocks again, feeling the velvety texture of her bare skin this time. Kerry moaned quietly at the back of her throat as I squeezed and kneaded the cheeks of her arse. The indication of Kerry's arousal made my cock thicken with anticipation and Kerry pulled away from the kiss, looking down at the bulge in my jeans.

'Baby, you're looking a little uncomfortable,' she grinned, snaking a hand down between our bodies and unbuckling my belt. 'Let's get him out to play shall we?' The corners of my wife's luscious mouth turned up as she grinned wickedly.

I loved the way she could be so demure and vanilla, her public and professional façade. Then, in the right circumstances as I knew from wonderful experience, she could be a complete slut. My wife loved sex. She loved to taste my cock; to have it spit its thick, gooey spunk into her mouth, over her breasts, on her face and in her hair. She didn't care where I chose to deliver my sticky load. In return she loved to have me lick her pussy and clit, to probe deeply into her with my tongue, and to finger her cunt whilst lapping busily on her excited clitoris. She would dress up, do role play, fuck outdoors, and occasionally take my hard cock into the taboo zone of her arse when the mood was on her.

Kerry was a wonderful wife, and I loved her deeply, if she desired a baby, then I would be happy to oblige her. My business was secure; we didn't need to worry on a financial level. If Kerry left her job then we would still be very well off. Of course, the fact that I loved my wife aided my decision. If she wanted a baby, I would do my utmost to aid and support her and the baby. I was at a place in my life where I was certain I would make a good father. I could provide for my family, I was of a certain maturity whereby I could provide love, support, discipline, and whatever else a child needed. Yes, I thought to myself, perhaps the time was right.

Kerry scooped my hardening prick out of my jeans and lowered herself to kneel on the carpet in front of me. She massaged my lengthening cock for several brisk strokes and then wrapped her lips around the head. Her cheeks took on a concave aspect as she sucked at my root and I groaned at the delicious sensation my wife's vacuuming mouth had upon my stiffness.

'Shit baby,' I swore. 'That's so good… Jesus.'

My cock sprang from between Kerry's lips with an audible pop, and she smiled up at me, grinning sexily from her position on the carpet. 'Like that, don't you? You're just a dirty bastard who wants to stick his big prick into me,' she continued lewdly, her words exciting me even more.

'Yes,' I growled, pulling my wife to her feet. 'You're right, I do want to fuck you,' I continued, adding, 'And if you want, I'll spunk inside you as often as it takes to get you pregnant.'

Kerry paused and looked at me. 'Really?' she asked incredulously. It was as though she couldn't believe what she was hearing. 'You wouldn't mind? You want a baby?'

I smiled at her, trying my best to look loving and caring in spite of the fact that my cock was jutting hugely from my groin. 'If that's what you want Kerry,' I said, 'I meant what I said, let me come deep inside you. Let me fill you with my seed.'

Kerry walked into the bedroom, pulling her dress over her head as she moved. My ardour flared when I saw Kerry's tapered waist widening at her feminine hips, her peach shaped arse swaying as she walked. Turning she stood by the foot of our bed and reached back to unclasp her bra. Her full, round, heavy breasts fell free, jiggling and swaying with gravity and her movements. Their sexy wobbling excited me, and Kerry's nipples were already stiff, standing out thick and rubbery. I knew from long experience that this was a sure sign that Kerry was hugely sexually aroused.

Next, she hooked her thumbs into the waistband of her knickers and pulled them down over her hips. She let them fall to the floor and then stood with proud arrogance in front of me, hands on hips as though challenging me with her nakedness.

Kerry is a magnificent sight when she's undraped. The full force of her ripeness and her mature, voluptuous figure is best displayed when she is completely nude. Well, I tell a lie, she looks fucking sexy in lingerie too, but the point I'm trying to clumsily make is that at 35 years old, she's a very good looking woman when naked. Her legs are shapely and proportioned, her tight narrow waist is emphasised by her broad hips and big bosom. Her back is gently curved, and the top of her round, sexy buttocks dimpled. The view from behind is superb, with Kerry's straight, golden hair hanging down to just above her arse cheeks.

I moved awkwardly towards my wife as she stood, hands on hips in a provocative pose. I pulled my jeans off with hurried aggravation, and hopped around for a moment or two trying to get my pants off along with my jeans such was my haste. Kerry helped me with my t shirt, and before I knew it I was as naked as she.

We kissed again, and this time I cupped Kerry's heavy tits in my hands, rubbing my thumbs over her erect nipples. Moments later I pushed my wife onto her back on our bed. I knelt on the carpet and used my hands to spread her soft thighs, exposing the light blonde hair of her pubic bush. I spread the folds of her labia with my fingers and dipped my tongue into the pink wetness of her opening.

Kerry sighed when she felt my tongue touch her sensitive centre and I switched my efforts to dab at her hard, pink clit. 'Oh God, my love,' she groaned. 'Lick my cunt, stick your finger in me, deep.'

I was surprised at Kerry's ardour. I knew she could be vocal, but her tone was especially strident this evening. Perhaps it was the prospect of becoming pregnant that made the difference? I don't know; all I can say is that Kerry was especially accommodating that night. There was some frisson; some extra spice in our lovemaking, and Kerry was at her wanton best as I licked at her dribbling sex. Kerry was groaning and sighing as I tongued at her body, her juice virtually pouring from her hot, inflamed core.

I licked the tip of my finger so it was nice and wet with my saliva, then gently tickled Kerry's pink opening. She groaned when she felt the double pronged attack of my tongue on her clit and my probing finger. I pushed my finger further and further inside Kerry, gently massaging the soft, spongy wall of her vagina, heightening her pleasure and excitement.

My cock was leaking pre cum and I was becoming more aroused with every soft sigh and moan that passed from my wife's lips. I redoubled my efforts on her clit and was eventually rewarded by Kerry's explosive panting as her climax took effect.

Kerry arched her back, forcing her groin onto my face. The juice flowed freely from her and she became frantic, clawing at the bed, her tendons and muscles straining and tightening.

As my wife's orgasm took control of her senses I quickly climbed between her thighs and slid my aching cock into her. Her liquid core accepted my intruding cock easily, and I felt the heat of Kerry's cunt close around my shaft, welcoming my prick with its clenching embrace.

Kerry's eyes opened when she felt me enter her and she smiled up at me as I held myself above her body on my outstretched arms. 'Love me baby,' she whispered. 'Love me; give me your sperm. Make me big with a baby. '

Kerry moved her hips gently beneath me, fucking slowly and tenderly. It was a well practiced movement that she knew would excite me and precipitate my ejaculation.

I bent my arms and lowered my mouth to Kerry's gently jiggling breasts. I took the rubbery teat of her nipple into my mouth and sucked gently on it. I found my wife's breasts fascinating. I loved the soft, springy texture of them, and would happily suck and caress their firmness for ages.

Kerry began to hump against me with more urgency and I felt the inevitable surging as my spunk began its journey along my shaft. 'Kerry… I'm coming,' I managed to murmur before I fell against her soft body, my cock pulsing and jetting cum.

'Give it to me, darling,' Kerry whispered, the delight evident in her tone as my semen flooded her insides.

***

Kerry came off the pill the next day. Of course we both knew that it can take a fair degree of time for the chemical effect to fully dissipate from a woman's system, and therefore we had no particular concerns when she didn't fall pregnant within the first few weeks.

As time went on however, and there was no sign that our efforts had borne fruit, the tension began to build.

Pregnancy became an obsession with Kerry. She would pin all her hopes upon the tiny indicator screens on the pregnancy kits hoping for a positive result. The devastation that their continued obstinacy produced was heartbreaking to see every four or five weeks.

I would come home from work to find Kerry in floods of tears and in the depths of despair. I began to have real fears for her sanity, something had to be done, and things couldn't go on in this way for much longer.

'We need to get ourselves checked out,' I said one evening a few days after the latest disappointment.

'What?' Kerry asked. 'By a doctor you mean?'

'Yep,' I replied. 'This isn't healthy. I'm really worried about you Ker.'

Kerry looked at me, the despair evident on her face. I could see the hollowing of her cheeks and the dark smudges beneath her eyes.

'We'll get checked, see if there's a problem and take things from there, Ok?' I made a conscious effort to convey some brightness into my voice. I wanted a positive atmosphere for the sake of my wife. At least if we knew there was a problem with either one of us we could formulate a plan and move forward.

'…Ok,' Kerry mumbled, tears welling in her eyes. 'I just want a baby. I want it so badly…' The fat tears slowly trickled unheeded down Kerry's cheeks and my heart ached with love for her. She was so lovely, so beautiful; all she desired was a child, and that void in her life was causing me as much pain as it was her. My world was being torn apart whenever I saw how devastated she was.

I set the appointments up and we both went for some tests. Kerry's were far more intrusive than mine which didn't help our relationship much either, but after only a couple of weeks we knew what the problem was.

It was entirely down to me. Kerry had no apparent problems whatsoever. Everything looked good from her point of view, however my sperm count was low, very low in fact.

The doctors made all sorts of excuses on my behalf, recommending diet, exercise, no alcohol etc, but I knew deep inside myself that it was a lost cause as far as I was concerned.

Kerry and I talked about it. We talked innumerable nights away as we sought to find the answer to our dilemma. We spoke of adoption, fostering and surrogacy. We had some wild ideas and fantastic plans, but it all came to nothing because the main sticking point was that Kerry wanted to be pregnant. It wouldn't be enough for her to have another woman's child as her own. She viewed it as pretending, as playing at motherhood, and as mad as that notion may seem to other people it was the way my wife felt. She wanted to feel her body change, to feel the baby grow and move inside her, and she wanted to feel the joy of pushing the infant all bloody and bawling into the world.

I suppose it was a measure of Kerry's desperation and my intense desire to please her at whatever cost that led to the incredible plan that we eventually formulated. We decided after endless discussion that we would look for a sperm donor. Not from any clinic, or other reputable source, what we decided upon was that we would advertise for a man to impregnate my wife.

It wasn't as seedy as it sounds. We meant to carry out interviews of prospective donors, and to carefully select the man by means of our elimination process. We would require proof of health and education standards in addition to a crime free record. I had the wealth and resources to check on our candidate's bona fides, and was exacting and diligent in my checks.

Eventually we had our man. He was a young Englishman by the name of Alex, and he met our criteria almost exactly. He held himself together very well during what could have been an awkward interview, and I could see that Kerry was quite impressed by his performance.

He conducted himself with wry humour and a businesslike approach, impressing both Kerry and me. Impregnating another man's wife is a very difficult area with which to maintain an objective attitude, but Alex managed to put both myself, and more importantly Kerry, at ease.

Very early on in our planning Kerry had said that she didn't wish to have a clinical, anonymous process involving anything mechanical. This presented a dilemma since it meant that a fair degree of intimacy was required. Alex would have to - at some point - present his prick to Kerry long enough for his semen to flood her insides. This had all manner of psychological implications for me, and also threw up questions of my presence at the moment of conception. Would I be in the room to witness the event? If I were, what impact would witnessing such an act have upon my psyche?

To be truthful I didn't really think too long or too hard about it. My overriding desire was that Kerry fell pregnant at the earliest opportunity. If that took some degree of sacrifice from me, then so be it. I wouldn't be content until my wife had a baby swelling her abdomen, then we could finally be content.

Or so I thought.

***

Alex came to our house one Thursday evening. Kerry was ovulating and according to her endless graphs and charts tonight was he night. It seemed a fairly low key introduction considering the magnitude of the journey we were about to embark upon, but I opened the door to a slightly nervous Alex as though he was just popping round for a meal. Alex was well presented in his suit, as though he was arriving for a job interview. He had taken great pains with his appearance and was freshly groomed and bathed.

I offered him a drink, which he declined, and we spoke no more as we made our way upstairs to the bedroom where Kerry nervously awaited.

'Hi, Kerry,' Alex said in a fairly relaxed manner despite the awkward circumstances that necessitated his visit.

'Hello, Alex,' Kerry smiled shyly in response. She was under the bedcovers, chastely hiding herself from the man who was hopefully about to give her his sperm.

'In there,' I said, indicating our en suite bathroom. The plan was that Alex was to masturbate until his climax was all but inevitable, then he would come into the bedroom and present his cock to Kerry's pussy. The intent being that he would be inside my wife no longer than it took to him to come and hopefully fertilise her egg with his sperm.