My name is Sarah. I'm married with two kids and am 37 years old. You'll notice I did not say "happily married" because that wouldn't be accurate although I'm not unhappily married. Like so many women my age, we are just treading water and a bit bored with life. At this point there must be a little more to life than raising kids and seeing my husband ignore me. Oh, don't get me wrong. He does his fatherly duties by taking our kids to their games or attending school functions. He pays the bills and occasionally takes me to dinner but I wouldn't say he wines and dines me. I get the customary flowers on our anniversary when he remembers. As for sex, he's a prude. Sex with him isn't exciting. It's the same old routine we've done over and over again for years. He kisses my nipples for a few minutes, touches my clit and shoves a finger or two in my pussy. If he feels I'm wet enough, in he goes for a dozen strokes and then it's over ... mostly in the missionary position. He never suggests trying something new but when I try to be creative, he says, "Sarah, I don't need a whore in bed, just a loving wife."
There is little value to go on about my husband who is married to his work or the many business trips that keeps him away but it is easy to see that I'm not a high priority in his life. I'm not looking for sympathy here but just an understanding of my situation. I want more out of life and I'm primarily wanting to find out who I am, especially my sexuality. Have I missed out on the those intense intimate experiences that shape a woman's self worth providing the satisfaction she craves?
What follows is a long journey with a few detours to discover the inner woman that was hidden between being a good wife and motherhood. Questions about my sexuality lingered since the birth of our second child. The answer turned out to be rather simple. First, I had to experience sex within a variety of sexual preferences. I had to move out of my comfort zone. Perhaps an affair with the attractive neighbor would satisfy my yearning but an affair is just an affair. I could just be fucking a man for the sake of having a different partner who might not provide much more than my husband. There had to be something more to learning about my sexual self than having casual sex with a neighbor or even with strangers. I had to learn what else was out there.
Let's back up for a moment and look at my past experiences. I started having my period around 15. This was a lot later than most of the girls so in a sense, I was a late bloomer. During high school I dated a few different boys but none were serious. By the age of 18, I was experiencing raging hormones. Our family doctor suggested I take birth control pills to help tame the hormonal imbalance. They worked. After high school graduation, I had a serious boyfriend and I became sexually active. The first time was in June, actually June 25th. A girl remembers a thing like that so I remember it really well. My boyfriend was over to the house when my parents were out to dinner and a movie. We were on the couch watching a video and of course, we were making out big time. He started playing with my boobs but that wasn't really new. He had fondled me almost from the start. He had my bra off and started sucking on my fully ripe tits. Now we were breaking new ground, as the saying goes. I loved it! This turned me on more than ever before. My natural reaction was to reach down and touch the bulge in his pants and that is exactly what happened. I felt the hardness between his legs but I didn't stop there. I think it gave my boyfriend the idea I was wanting more when unzipping his jeans and putting my hand inside the zipper. He said something like, take it out and suck it.
The boy (his name was Tommy) took off my blouse so I was naked from the waist up and I felt the excitement of showing off my body to a boy. My hand caressed his pulsing meat and there was something wet oozing out of the top. Feeling a guy's organ was like holding a warm thick sausage and it was thrilling. My heart was pounding and my head was filled with lust. He pushed my head down to his erection that stood like a soldier at attention. "Go down on it," he pleaded. "Just put it in your mouth." Sucking on a penis was what the girls called a blow job so it seemed that was what a girl was supposed to do. I finally got the nerve up to touch it with my lips and tongue, then put him in my mouth. When I did that, he held my head showing me how to bob up and down fucking his dick with my mouth. I could taste his ooze or precum and was surprised at the salty flavor. Tommy kept pushing my head down so I could take him deep into my throat but I could do nothing more than gag. Other than that I got into the rhythm giving him a nice blow job, my first.