In life there are times when through boredom, indifference, or desire we knowingly place ourselves on the edge of a precipice. We can peer over that edge and imagine or fantasize about taking that leap without actually doing it because the image or fantasy is sweeter than the reality. This is one of those times.
I had to ask myself.
OMG!!...
what did I do?? How does... a 52-year old woman named Farrah who has been married for 30 years and lives in Seattle wind up in a hotel room with two half-naked men? All the while doing things she never even imagined, let alone saw herself doing. For God's sake...I'm a grandmother!!
It all started innocently enough on a warm September night, on an online poker table. My loving husband Steve had fallen asleep around midnight. I am a night owl & cannot fall asleep until around 3 a.m. The envelope sailed across the dealer table and headed towards me. It was not the first envelope to sail my way that night, but it wound up being the most interesting by far. The sender of the envelope judging from his small avatar picture appeared to be a handsome early mid-forties man named Richard. He "bought" me a glass of wine & started conversing with me using the sidebar chat. I've had many poker buddies and admirers online but, this one was different. I could not put my finger on it, and that intrigued me.
You see, I have been married for over 30 years. I am a mother and a grandmother, and I have never been with anyone but my husband Steve. I was not looking to start a relationship other than that of an online poker buddy and that was it.
As the game drew to an end, we found ourselves the only 2 players left in the game. We continued conversing on the side chat like two lonely people finding themselves being the last patrons in a bar at closing time and not wanting to say goodnight. We were enjoying our conversation and banter. Richard asks me, "Where do you live?" I reply, the Seattle, Washington area. He tells me that Seattle is one of his favorite cities as he visits once or twice a year on business. As we say goodnight and reluctantly leave the poker room chat Richard asks, "What is your Facebook name?" Why I gave it to him, I will never know. No, wait... I knew that I wanted more of his sexy charismatic attention, his quick wit, and intellect. Nothing more, I thought.
The next day, I was surprised to see a FB instant message from Richard pop-up on my screen. He wasted no time in starting to spin his tantalizing web & pulling me into his dark secret double life. I was not prepared to resist his charm and wit. On the surface he was a church going faithful husband & doting father of 3-daughters to all that knew him in the real-world. Richard was an outstanding upright pillar of his church & community. Richard was a successful renowned architect with his own firm. That was the "White Knight" Richard that disarmed me, got me to lower my defenses as he wormed his way into my mind, heart, & elsewhere. The "Dark Knight" Richard shocked me & thrilled me at the same time as he asked me, "Have you ever sexted?"
I quickly typed, NO! I had never considered it an option for me. Richard had been sexting with others he told me... I was shocked! Now, with his mere asking I knew that I wanted to try sexting with him. Was this for me or for him? After all... I'm a grown mature woman in my 50's, I had to remind myself. Then why do I have butterflies in my stomach like a teenager? The shocking thing to me is that I wanted him to pull me to his dark side. Truth be known, I longed for him to take me along on his online fantasy & possibly beyond. This was quickly becoming my fantasy, as I have never had a sexual fantasy much to Steve's chagrin. I started feeling the familiar aching in my loins as I am a woman with an active happy sex life. I find myself now fantasizing about someone or something new after 30-years of marriage.
As Richard starts reeling me in for our first sexting session we talk about our lives & our spouses. Richard tells me, "My wife never has orgasms, do you moan?" he asks. I don't moan, I tell him... no words appear on my screen as I picture his disappointment. I scream like someone being tortured into ecstasy, I type. You will definitely know when I have an orgasm. It is the truth, my husband gauges my orgasms by my screams. My record is 17-screaming orgasms in one love making session, I type. The neighbors said they thought about calling the police as they thought someone was being murdered. I laugh as I hit send and realize my familiar ache is turning into a tingling and
OMG!!...
I'm wet. I have never experienced this with any man other than my husband Steve. I am shocked & dismayed with myself and ... I must admit... a little pleased at the same time. I never knew that another man could make me feel this way. At that moment, I realized that I had the potential to become a "secret cyber-slut." For God's sake...we haven't even sexted yet.
The next live message from Richard states, "The thought of your screaming orgasms is giving me an erection!" I start pulsating with Richard's words of encouragement on my screen that I was giving him an erection. I reach for one of my guilty pleasures in my nightstand, a green Lelo vibrator. Within 2-minutes of penetration I had growled out a small orgasm stifling my screens as I clenched my teeth imagining Richard's erection in my mouth as I was cuming.
OH DAMN
I'm too easy!! Screw the potential cyber-slut part. I was now a burn in hell slut with my very first sext message from Richard stating that I was giving him an erection. How easy am I? Does this mean I have to go to confession? My potential online lover missed my first orgasm, as I did not let on to him what I was doing with my vibrator. Feeling let down at that thought, a couple of tears started rolling down my cheek...were they tears of joy or shame? Now, I am really confused. I slam my computer shut vowing never to take a message from Richard again.
At that moment my husband Steve walked into the room & saw the love of his life with tears running down her cheeks. He caught me red-handed, a guilty look emblazoned across my face, one hand on my laptop, & the other holding the "smoking gun," my Lelo vibrator.
Oh shit!!
I had not even began my secret life of a cyber-slut and I'm already busted.
Steve, my husband adores me and I know that I can literally do no wrong. He proudly claims that he has never told me no in our 30-years of marriage. It is true, but maybe now I have crossed that line and he might just tell me...NO! He constantly tells me how sexy I am and that he adores my sexiness. Will he still feel that way when I tell him that I have been somewhat seduced on-line? Steve has always encouraged me to flirt on the poker tables. Men half my age & younger flirt with me & "buy" me gifts on the poker tables proclaiming their undying love to my poker profile picture & he gets a kick-out-of-it.
Truth is...I have to admit that I do not look my age. Men and women guess my age at between 37 to 41 years. So...I take a leap of faith and tell Steve what happened & show him the texts from my flirting with Richard. I leave out my tingling feelings & my erotic orgasm while fantasizing about sucking Richard's cock. I am looking away from Steve while I am telling him this so that he cannot see the dreamy lust in my eyes. To my surprise, I feel his erection against me as he has grown quite excited by my online adventure. We make deep love as I am still excited from my online tryst. I have 3-orgasms to his one as he apologizes telling me that he was too turned-on by my adventure and came too soon. He knew full well I could reach many more orgasms.
As we cuddle post coitus Steve asks me if I intended to continue sexting with Richard. I tell him NO! Steve sounds a little disappointed by my quick response. He tells me that he finds the idea of his wife being taken by another man in cyber-space very sexy as he adores my sexiness. Steve is very aware of the fact that other men admire me in public and notice the way I look and dress as they look me up & down. I usually wear a dress & heeled sandals almost every day, winter or summer. I have quite the collection of both in an array of colors to choose from to match my mood and sexiness on any given day. It is a rare day when I do not get a compliment on my dress or shoes. He tells me that it is a shame that Richard cannot see the way that I look & dress. Steve suggests that I keep in touch with him and maybe send him some pictures. I respond, that would be like throwing fuel on the fire. Richard does not need any more encouragement.
Now, I am an attractive natural blond with shoulder length hair & blue eyes and I can already picture my white "Marilyn" dress & red ankle-strap sandals I would be wearing if I do send Richard a picture. When I wear that outfit mouths drop & heads are constantly turning from both men & women, times two for the men. Steve recently took pictures of me wearing that outfit in a Marilyn Monroe pose, even I have to admit that I look sexy in these pics.
Steve then sheepishly tells me his deep-dark fantasy, he fantasizes that I suck him off while taking another man deep in my pussy. He adores my orgasms & wants to feel my screams around his cock when I come. He tells me that he sees me wearing my "Marilyn" dress & red ankle-strap sandals that he recently took pictures of me in as I'm sucking him off. I feel lightheaded as a strong pulsating spasm grips my groin and I groan as I picture Steve's fantasy with me in the middle impaled by him & Richard while wearing my "Marilyn" outfit.
OMG!!
...Steve is smiling as he realizes that his fantasy is turning me on. He tells me how much he loves it when men look at me with lust in their eyes. "It actually turns me on," he proclaims as he tells me that the idea of an online tryst with Richard really excites him. "Can we explore this together?" he asks. I have to admit that that sounds fine with me as I want to explore my budding sexual feelings concerning Richard. I appear reluctant to Steve as I say, OK...just this one time.
The next day when I log onto my FB page I have a message from Richard asking me why I suddenly disappeared leaving him with a huge erection. This makes me chuckle at the thought, when an instant message from Richard pops up on my screen. Here goes nothing...I tell Richard my husband Steve walked into the room & I had to close my computer. Whew, that was easy. I leave out the ensuing conversation Steve and I had concerning him. Richard then asks me what I "really" look like as he has only seen my small poker profile pic. I tell him I can do better than that, I can send you a pic,
"fuel on the fire."
I have those pictures of me in my "Marilyn" dress Steve took with a fan blowing. One of the pics has my white dress billowing upwards showing a hint of my natural blonde patch and I'm wearing my red sandals accentuated with red painted toes. Here goes nothing...I hit send with the picture attached. I realize that I am tingling and moist with anticipation as I await Richard's response to my "Marilyn" pose. Imojis of panting dancing dogs & exclamations marks and hashtags bombard my laptop screen. "
IS THAT REALLY YOU??"
Richard asks. Yes, that is really what 52-year-old woman named Farrah looks like.
Is it that bad??
I ask Richard.
"Farrah...you are fucking gorgeous!!"
Richard types. He tells me that my blue eyes are amazing & that he loves the billowing white dress & the curves of my body and legs. "You are a sensuous & intoxicating woman all the way down to the tips of your painted red toes. You are
