How to explain the conflicted feelings? Guilt, remorse and overwhelming sexual excitement, knowing that my wife of twenty years had taken a short vacation with a man half her age, giving herself to him with unrestrained passion.
Maybe a latent masochistic bent made itself apparent in my middle age. Maybe the sexual excitement deflects the pain. Whatever it is, it's a confusion of emotion that I cannot honestly say was unexpected. But I guess I should start at the beginning.......
My wife Elena, is 45 years of age and I am 50. We met when she was 23 and I was 28. The sexual spark between us was always strong then, and probably the main force that kept us together during some rocky times in the relationship. Elena is of Italian descent, 5' 91/2" tall, slender, delicately-boned, long-legged, with full 34 DD breasts (nipples pointing up), perfect golden-olive skin, and those Italian womanly hips that a man instinctively lusts after. Her long dark-brown hair has some color help now, but it is still one of her best features. Her best facial feature are her eyes, which are huge almond-shaped, doe eyes. Honestly, the most frequent visual comparison people made with her has always been the young Sophia Loren. But she also shares some of the same hot-blooded temperament that Sophia displayed in so many movies. And therein lies part of the problem.
Over the years, Elena has blossomed even more beautifully than her youth, and she has always been conscious of it, to the point where the focus has primarily become spending on anything that makes her feel young or good. Over the 20 years, we have had bitter fights over money, as I don't earn quite enough to fully support her in the custom she requires. In fact, she earns more than I do in her position as a business manager in computing firm, which makes it difficult for me to tell her not spend money like a drunken sailor. There have been tough times trying to keep a budget, and our debt never seems to diminish. Through it all, we have always remained faithful to each other, although I know we both have had many opportunities for affairs.
In the last few years , I have found that although I still love her and find her extremely alluring, my sex drive and attention to her needs has tapered off. Part of the blame goes to anti-depressants I have been taking since learning in one of our marriage counseling sessions that I am clinically depressed - they really seem to take libido away. This has been one of her major complaints the past few years. She has always loved sex and required a good deal more of it than I could handle at times. But lately the frequency has dropped off to less than once a week, and when she isn't getting fucked regularly, she is not happy.
Through all this, I found myself fanticizing more and more about her fucking another man. It probably helped in some way with my libido, as I don't have any fetishes, and this seemed to always help. We have fucked and sucked in every possible way, but she has lines which it seems she will never cross. I brought the other-man idea up a few times during sex, but she always seemed against the idea. One time she told me she really didn't see other any men that would turn her on enough to do it. Although it was a compliment to me, my fantasy was basically left at just that.
Anyway, in the last six months or so the situation of arguing over money and the frequency of sex has gone from bad to worse. I think we've resented each other more and more, and I know I've been neglecting her and her feelings - which any man should know is a very dangerous thing.
Well, back to the present. I came home from work Friday and on the kitchen table found a letter from Elena: "Dear Michael, as you know, we've both been very unhappy lately. I have tried connecting with you over the past couple of months but you only seem to push me further away. Our sex life has dwindled to nothing, and though I think I‘ve been very patient and understanding, I just can't take the rejection. I think I'm a beautiful and desirable woman, and plenty of men confirm this to me every day. It's too bad my husband can't feel the same way. So, I ‘ve decided to take a breather from you. I told you about a new programmer named Rick who started work for me a couple of months ago. Well, Rick has been paying me a lot of attention and complements, which is doing my ego a load of good since he's 23 and gorgeous. We‘ve had lunch together a few times and he's always upbeat and positive, such a change from what I'm getting at home.
Anyway, I've grown very fond of him, and I know the sexual tension between us has become unbearable for us both. We've flirted a lot, but have not so much as even touched each other. Well, I'm changing that. I know you think I left for work this morning but actually l didn't. I've charmed Rick into going away with me for a couple of nights. We'll I tell you I didn't have to twist his arm much. He was concerned about my husband, but I told him you were all for it, that you were into that sort of thing and actually encouraged me. Well, it's rather true isn't it? You've been hinting at me fucking another man for some time now, and as I see it, now is the time. We are leaving tonight for a two night escape, not too far away. I have the hotel reservations and everything planned out. By the way, and here's the best part.....I am bringing along the laptop and Rick is bringing his digital camera with remote control. Ingenious isn't it? Rick and I will be E-mailing you pictures of our little trip for your enjoyment (and mine I must say), and I plan on fucking his cock off! Expect the first tonight. P.S. - I want you to think about what you really want while I'm gone. When I get back, I want you to know if you really want me or not, and if you do, how will things change. Also, there will be absolutely no recourse against Rick. I practically seduced him into it, besides he thinks you don't mind. I'll see you when I'm back in town....E."
I felt a combination of numbness and as though a scud hit me right between the eyes. But there was also a sexual excitement under it all. The fact that my wife of 20 years, who's body and soul had been mine for so long, would be fucking a young stud was making me dizzy thinking about it. It's so strange, this bittersweet concoction that I seem to thirst for, but pain/pleasure must better than feeling nothing at all.
I mixed myself a strong bourbon and coke and went inside the bedroom where I got naked, put on my bath robe, and turned on the computer. I logged on and went right to my mail box. There was some spam from earlier in the day. I waited for what seemed forever but at 8:00 there was a message titled "First Batch". It was from Elena. I opened the message and there were 4 attached pictures. The message said "Rick and I are at our hotel. Here are a few pics from earlier in the day. Nothing steamy yet. Thought I'd just set the mood for you. Sweet dreams".
I opened the first picture and it was of Elena and Rick at a restaurant. They were sitting outdoors in a tropical setting. She had on a short slinky dress slit up the side which exposed her long, golden outer thigh. Rick's hand was on it , and she was looking over at him laughing, while he smiled for whoever took the picture. The caption said: "Here we are after arrival, waiting for dinner - Have to keep our energy up! At dinner, Rick ordered champagne! I told him how it makes me do crazy things, and he said "perfect".
The second pic was of the hotel room, focusing on the bed. It was a suite with an island theme, very classy. The message: Here is where Rick will be fucking me, your beautiful wife. I'm so excited! Are you? The third pic was of Elena more beautiful than ever, in a skimpy teddy outfit posing on the bed. The sheer top exposed her beautiful tits and her legs were slightly spread. She had on a pair of sheer panties through which you could see the crack of her closely shaved pussy. Rick must have loved this view. The caption: "I picked up this little number for Rick. Judging by his cock, I'd say he loves it. The forth pic was Rick laying on the bed wearing only a flimsy thong which barely covered his cock. Elena knows how to pick ‘em. He was dark haired, tanned, handsome, and had a body sculpted like a Greek statue. I could see that his cock, although in the thong, was thick and long, with perfectly formed egg-sized balls underneath. He looked like a young fucking machine, and I knew my wife was ready to drain him all night long for 2 nights. The message: "How do you like Rick? Here he is just before he gets to fuck me. Can't wait to feel how long and hard that thing gets! Ta Ta for now. Expect more tomorrow...and just think of what he's doing with me right now!
My cock was harder than a diamond dildo, but out of spite I didn't touch it. I shut the computer down, made another stiff drink and just listened to music until I fell asleep. I woke up later in the night and my cock was still hard. Still half asleep, I jacked off thinking about Elena and Rick, and shot a huge load all over my chest.
