Sheets of rain cascaded across my windshield. The radio announced flash flood warnings for the area. Just another fine day in the valley, I mused. Unfortunately, that did nothing for my general state of exhaustion, so I heaved forward over the steering wheel.
Confusion returned as one thought emerged - Leah has given me a venereal disease. She has slept with another man. It was unthinkable. It was impossible. It must be a mistake. But the doctor had triple checked the results with the lab. The evidence led to just one conclusion: my wife of 12 years had engaged in adulterous sex and had inflected me.
I sat immobile as the minutes passed. I would have to confront her with this, but I had no answers, only questions. Who? Why? How could two people who said they loved each other be in this situation? For the first time since I was a child I cried openly.
Hours later I called Leah's cell and left a message. I spoke in a controlled voice: "Leah I've just returned from the doctor's office. I have Gonorrhea. You need to seek treatment immediately...and your lover too."
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Leah was 36, a mother of 2, and the love of my life. We'd met on a blind date arranged by a former classmate of mine. The thought of meeting a stewardess was the hook.
I arrived early was seated near a window when she entered. She was wearing a yellow pantsuit. At 5'9'' she was taller than all of my previous girlfriends, and she carried herself with authority. Her strides and they were strides, brought attention to her long legs. She closed the distance so quickly that I barely cleared my seat as her hand was raised to greet me.
I was immediately taken with her dimpled smile. It was warm and conveyed sincerity. Her hair was cut extremely short, highlighting a very pretty face. This woman could have been a model were it not for the slightly wide expanse of her hips. Always one to appreciate a womanly figure, I thought she was lovely, and I knew right then that I wanted to know everything about her.
Our conversation flowed. She was a flight attendant and had been so since graduating college with a degree in history. She loved flying overseas but her travel came with a price. A year into the job she found herself feeling disconnected. Her schedule made it difficult to meet people outside of work. Then Joanie, our mutual friend, had mentioned this guy she wanted her to meet. Of course that recommendation went unheeded for months ...until that night.
A second date followed, a third shortly thereafter. Her schedule made our fourth more of a reunion than a date. On our sixth date we made love for the first time - a night I'll always remember.
I was nibbling on her ear while we were supposedly watching a movie. I had done this a few times before and enjoyed how much it turned her on. On this occasion she almost literally attacked me. I was caught totally off guard.
Within moments she had taken off most of my clothes while her tongue was doing a deep probe of my tonsils. Her movements were urgent so I intended to match her enthusiasm. It took a great deal of effort to flip her over so that I could gain access to her sex. I dove into her muff quickly, my tongue sliding over the full length of her slit.
Leah jerked upwards and sat up with a surprised look on her face. She was at a loss for words as I repeated the process and then she began a long moan as I found her clit. After several minutes of this I reared up to enter her. She had spread her legs at an obscene angle to accommodate me. As I progressed a few inches I hit an obstruction.
I guess my shock was evident. She was a virgin. She nodded her head and asked me to continue. She said that she had waited for me long enough, she needed me now. I was having difficulty in controlling my movements, but knowing that she was a virgin only heightened my arousal while awakening a protective instinct.
I slowed and focused on distracting her from the imminent pain. I captured her ear lobe with my lips while I pinched her nipple. When she reacted I took her virginity and paused as she adjusted to my presence.
She started to hyperventilate. I took to calming her as best I could as we began the ancient dance. When she came, her lower regions lifted my body as her arms encircled me in an embrace so tight I exhaled reflexively. She slowly released the pressure but continued to hold me too her long after I had receded from her body. When she finally let me go she began tickling my flanks. Her devilish grin only made me love her more. We slept on that couch until morning.
Leah proved to be an imaginative lover who often took the initiative: once we were blindfolded as we massaged and then coupled; on another occasion we enjoyed warm oils; on another we experimented with body paints - the last was messy but a lot of fun. Odd, but I could not imagine sex with Leah without laughter. She always engaged in lovemaking with an innocence and humor that lasted throughout our marriage. Yes, the sex was wonderful.
I realized early on that I could not live without this woman in my life. That requirement predetermined my actions. After seven months of dating I proposed, and we were married a year later.
But a marriage is about more than sex. The biggest challenge in our relationship proved to be Leah's work schedule. She was gone almost 2 weeks of every month. So while the highs from sex were fantastic, the lows when she was gone were almost painful.
We had both declared that we wanted children. This was a wish that I encouraged, because I wanted them, and because I saw them as means of getting Leah to make more time for us.
When Angela was born, Leah was home the minimum amount of time, only weeks. Then it was off to work. I expressed concerns about her schedule but she joked about how it would be good bonding experience for me.
By default I became the primary care giver. Luckily my mother lived close by, and since my father was deceased, she was more than willing to take care of Angela while I worked. Thus began my routine and my introduction to parenthood.
Three years later Amanda was born. By this time my transition to Mr. Mom was complete. I'd mastered changing diapers, potty training, and the terrible-twos. I knew every Smurf character by name and had sung with Barney on more occasions than I could count.
While this wasn't the marriage I had envisioned I had to admit that I was becoming resigned to the arrangement. My father had not been very involved in my upbringing and I had vowed not to let that happen with my children. Each opportunity to be with them was a joy. They began to have an unusual calming effect on my anxieties. I still missed Leah but her absence was less noticeable; yet I worried that the girls needed more of her time.
As Amanda neared school age I took up the subject again with Leah of her schedule. Couldn't she investigate another job within the company? Weren't there openings in the local station? Wasn't she concerned about the entire industry? Certainly the likelihood of her ever getting a pension from them was iffy at best. The airlines owed billions in unfunded pension obligations. They were all financially unstable so consolidation was inevitable, making her long term employment tenuous. It was best to make a move now.
None of these arguments prevailed. I was exaggerating the problem. I just wanted her home. This wasn't about a career change it was about her career period. I tried again on her next layover, and this time she not only responded with the same accusations but her mood darkened. We barely spoke during the next couple of weeks.
Subtlety was needed. So for the next few months I hinted at making a career change myself. I introduced her to friends who had made such moves. My mother spoke with her and her mother had similar conversations. Even my sister called her more frequently and spoke often about her job. The full court press was on.
Perhaps I should have left it be. But I was beginning to get used to her not being there for me and children and that really scared me. So instead of accepting the situation I increased the pressure. More surrogates were enlisted and they carried the same message.
Our sex life became the first casualty in this guerrilla war. Suddenly my responsive wife was unmoved by my overtures. Even out of bed she became less affectionate, more aloof and distant. Then the sex stopped.
After months without intimacy I decided to end this impasse. We sat down one evening on her last layover and I came clean. I apologized for my actions and asked for forgiveness. Solemn promises were made; I told her I simply wanted my wife back and to my surprise... she forgave me.
So our relationship returned to normalcy; that is until one routine visit to the doctor changed everything.
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