Jimmy came into the kitchen, poured himself a cup of coffee, sat down at the table and asked, "Can I join you, Jill? How are you today?"
"Please. It's a beautiful day, isn't it, Jimmy? I'm going to get out and enjoy it while we still can," she said setting her coffee down on the Sunday paper strewn about the table. Sunlight was streaming through the windows and skylights on a bright crisp autumn day lending credibility to her claim. Jimmy is one of her husband's closer friends and a frequent visitor to their home. He's a very average guy but better than average, he is a very nice guy. Most enjoyable about him was that he never hit or came on to her, except for the last time he was here, but that was different. "I guess you're here for the ballgame, huh?"
"Well you know. Billy's got the best television setup for the six of us. Our places wouldn't be as comfortable. I hope you don't mind our camping out here every Sunday afternoon."
"Not at all, as long as you guys continue chipping in for the beer and munchies, and clean up afterwards it's not an imposition at all. Frankly, I like the opportunity it gives me to do my own thing."
"Speaking of Sunday afternoons and doing your own thing, are you okay with last Sunday? I mean, it was extraordinary."
"I haven't really thought it through. Billy and I haven't talked about it much so I can't give you an answer. To tell you the truth, it's all kind of personal and I'm not sure I would answer you if I could, maybe another time. Now, go enjoy the game." Jill returned to the paper and sipped her coffee. After a moment she looked up and out the windows. The leaves had started to turn but she wasn't looking at them. She was deep in thought. Lost in her thoughts she uncrossed her legs and with her other hand caressed herself as an indulgent smile broke across her face. She put her coffee down and used both hands to push herself back. Standing up she smoothed her sweater, put the coffee mug on the counter and turned to the family room. Passing through all the men got to their feet saying "Yes" when she asked if it was going to be a good game. Turning to Billy she said, "I'm going out for a few hours" and to the others said, "See'ya fellas." She left the room to a chorus of "Bye, Jill."
Looking Back
Over the next several Sundays each of the group took an opportunity to seek her out and make small talk that always included a question or two about that infamous game day. The guys never discussed it at any of the cookouts, dinners or nights on the town they had with their wives. Slowly, over time though, idle gossip among the wives became a staple of their conversation. Who was the woman? Who were the guys? Just exactly what had happened?
Initially, Jill feigned ignorance before joining the speculation and taking pains to never reveal any of the truth, the truth that she was the woman and their husbands were the 'guys.' While this was going on her reaction changed from panic and paranoia at being found out to mild amusement. The indignation expressed by the spouses changed over time, as well, to curiosity and finally, grudging admiration for the mystery woman. All the while she and Billy had never come to grips with the events that led up to that memorable day and its consequences. They needed to because things were different now.
Quite apart from their circle of friends, Jill had her own and at least one of them was a confidant, Angela, from whom few secrets were withheld. It was through these channels that what sketchy details and a general outline of what had happened emerged into a larger circle. Soon the story propagated like a virus until it was the talk of the town, so to speak. Actually, there were many stories. Variations on a theme that result from distortions arising from many retellings, elaborations that had no basis in fact, and misunderstood gossip were rampant. It soon became apparent to Jill that there was little chance that the events and participants would never be sorted out and she would remain anonymous. It was at that point her paranoia became amusement and, just to have a little fun, she decided to add further chatter to the web (of intrigue) by suggesting details of her own, real and imagined. It became a game after a while.
About this time Billy and Jill seriously broached the topic trying to understand the gangbang's origin, and what it meant to them and their relationship. Several weeks had passed since that day giving each opportunity to turn events over in their minds and think about what it meant. It was clear that even though Jill had fucked five guys that day (Billy had not participated but had been present throughout) she was not the one most affected by it. It seems to have been a classic case of 'be careful of what you wish for.' Billy had fantasized about his wife being sexually satisfied beyond what was possible with only one or two partners. It would be easy to conclude his motivation was voyeuristic, a compulsion to share his wife with others to validate his choice of mate and her desirability, or a perverse act to demonstrate his control of her or her of him.
In fact, doubts about himself and his ability to satisfy her needs were the real motivation. Assessing himself to be an adequate lover at best there was no doubt in his mind that his lack of sophistication in bed and knowledge of female sexuality had denied Jill greater levels of satisfaction and gratification than he was capable of providing. What knowledge he did have in general and Jill in particular was, try as he might, not enough to bring her to a state of sexual euphoria. Even if he could it would not be practical to think he could do so on an ongoing basis. But he was sure she should experience it at least once so that fully informed she could decide for herself what she wanted. His other motivation was to have her fully satisfied. When aroused she would always want more than he could give. So much more that he doubted any one man could meet her demands and it would take several to fully satisfy her. In more crass terms, he felt he could not provide the quantity and quality of sex her fully awakened self might demand. In the past when lust and passion masked these concerns he was confident her needs were being met. Now, he was no longer sure.
Jill had come to their marriage sexually experienced. Perhaps a better way to assess her prowess is to say that she was not naive. She even admitted to having participated in a mΕ½nage a trios with two men on at least one occasion, and a man and a woman on another. Her motivations at the time had been curiosity and youthful excitement that comes from experimenting with forbidden behavior. It never really became a staple of her sex life. Since her marriage seven years ago sex had only been with Billy. He was capable of satisfying her and had, on occasion, taken her to toe curling levels of pleasure. All in all, she thought her life was full and rich, and had no desire to seek out new and possibly exciting experiences. That is until Billy started working on her.
On more than one occasion Billy had raised the possibility of expanding their sex life to offset the slow but persistent loss of passion. More often than not and with increasing frequency the spouse's role, that is the one that hadn't initiated the sex, was to see that the other was satisfied. They almost never were mutually spontaneous in their love making anymore. Their encounters had devolved into pure sex. When they had sex it was to satisfy a need. Oh, there was love involved but it now took the form of selflessly making sure the other was fulfilled. Lust and passion were a thing of the past. She could live with that. He didn't want to.
Never wanting to refuse him out of hand Jill always listened and discussed his thoughts with him. Over time she came to understand his point of view and had to acknowledge their relationship had become one of routine, familiarity, comfort and security, and their feelings toward each other were no longer sparked by lust or passion. Perhaps they had changed and the hormones needed to excite them were becoming harder and harder to produce. Were they falling out of love? Neither thought so. Maybe love itself becomes redefined over time?
Bringing another into their bed to infuse passion and lust was an option. By Billy's reasoning adding an experienced and talented partner to their sex might address his 'quality' concerns but did not provide the 'quantity' he thought was needed to completely satisfy a fully aroused Jill. She had never given adding a sex partner to their 'love making' any thought prior to his mentioning it. Well, at least not since they've been married. He left open the question of whether it should be a man or woman and, if it were a woman, would he expect to share her as well? When all the possibilities were considered it became too complex to think through. Too complex, at least, at this point in their metamorphosis from the safe harbor of their existing sex life to an as yet, undefined state.
