The Ballad of the Loving Wife
"I was ashamed of myself when I realized life was a costume party and I attended with my real face"
Franz Kafka
Abundance of Caution: Some will read this as an -ist, -ist-, ist, -obic, anti-This and Anti-That piece. It is not - but All Sensibilities Matter, hence the warning for those who'd rather not waste time on that which they find distasteful. The "story" simply aims towards Realism. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it will not violate Community Guidelines, and if it does, that the Guidelines can take it.
Like my other one, it isn't really a story - just another reaction to the occasional LW allergy attack. The socio-political preamble is meant to make an LW point through micro-macro parallelism, so kindly trust the process.
The piece is intended as an irreverent blend of sarcasm, neo-iconoclasm and lighthearted cynicism with a dash of dark humor to maximize resilience. I am aware sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, but LW is not the highest form of Literature either, so we do the best we can with the wit we have.
The sex is Exploratory.
...
What is
Wife
? What is
Loving Wife
? What about
Leaving Wife
? Part of a Union? What kind? Part of a Family? Lovely tangible abstraction, but abstraction nonetheless.
Symbolism 1
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.
Many acquired Equal Rights that day. Persons-with-Pulse acquired Equal Rights in the centuries that followed. What will Them do with Equal Rights? If Them looks unequal, quacks unequal, and walks unequal, Them is probably... well... you see...how does one explain this... um, graciously: Unequal. Some said Them would make the country a more just place. Others said Them would mess up natural hierarchy and put it straight into the HBOT (Hand Basket Over There) to meet its altered destiny. Only time will tell.
Symbolism 2
:
"I hereby declare, on oath, that I absolutely and entirely renounce and abjure all allegiance and fidelity to any foreign prince, potentate, state, or sovereignty, of whom or which I have heretofore been a subject or citizen; that I will support and defend the Constitution and laws of the United States of America against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I will bear arms on behalf of the United States when required by the law; that I will perform noncombatant service in the Armed Forces of the United States when required by the law; that I will perform work of national importance under civilian direction when required by the law; and that I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; so help me God."
Ilhan became a Naturalized Citizen today - and others like her. Will the lhan masses assimilate into the new culture? If it looks like an Ilhan, quacks like an Ilhan, and walks like an Ilhan, it's an Ilhan. Some say they make the Culture stronger. Some say they adulterate it. Only time will tell.
Symbolism 3:
"I pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one Nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all."
Juan became a School-Trained Patriot today, for the umpteenth time - and others like him. Will the Juan masses be loyal to their country? If it looks like Juan, quacks like Juan and walks like Juan, it's Juan. Some say they will make the country stronger. Others say they adulterate loyalty since their loyalty can't be but divided. Only time will tell.
Symbol 4:
To all whom these presents shall come, Greetings
Be It Known That
Klueless D. King
Having satisfied all the requirements for the degree of
Bachelor of Arts
Is accordingly admitted to that degree with all the honors, rights, and privileges thereunto appertaining here and elsewhere. In testimony whereof the seal of the University and the signatures as authorized by the Board of Trustees are hereunto affixed.
Given at Town, State, this Ninth day of May
In the Year of Our Lord Two Thousand and Who Knows Anymore
Klueless graduated from college today and walked on stage to receive his degree. If he looks like Klueless, quacks like Klueless, and walks the same way, he's very likely Klueless. There are many like him. Some say they will bring much needed skills to the job market. Others say they will inflate degrees. Only time will tell.
Symbolism 5:
"
I, Anyone, do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will faithfully execute the Office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my Ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States."
The Republic welcomed yet another First Bureaucrat today. The Constitution or the Nation? Will he lead the nation to Luminous Destiny? If he looks like a Bureaucrat, quacks for power like a Bureaucrat, and walks for power like a Bureaucrat, it's a Bureaucrat. Some say Prezes preserve, protect and defend the nation. Others say they adulterate its destiny, more often than not. Only time will tell.
You made it so far, Dear Readers, and you are getting my drift, Bless me. I do apologize for the Community Guidelines Porn.
Symbolism 6(66):
"In the name of God [
can you imagine?]
I, Loving Husband-to-Be, take you, Jane, to be my Loving Wife to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, 'til death do us part. This is my solemn vow."
Will Jane be a Loving Wife forever? Will he be a Loving Husband? Will They?
