I was trying to slow my breathing. Just when I thought I was under control, I would think of how humiliating this was going to turn out. People pass down all sorts of family traditions during the Holidays. Not me -- this would be all I will ever be known for. The only story that would ever be told about me.
"Lacey. They said don't move, not a muscle. An ambulance is on its way." Randall excitedly screamed from the other room.
I could feel the coolness of the hard wood floors under the soles of my feet. I watched the twinkling lights in the trees. First the lower quarter of the tree, then a 30 second delay until the next quarter of the tree lit. Another 30 second delay until they blinked off and the next quarter blinked on. I could see all the way up through the branches to the angel on top of the tree. Slivers of light shone through the branches, I could only see her face lit up.
"Lace -- I'm staying on the phone out here until I hear the sirens pulling up."
"Don't answer me Lace. You are going to be ok, the operator just told me to tell you that. I'll be right back at your side as soon as I hear them pulling up." Randall sounded like he was going to pass out.
Blink. The next string of lights lit up. I turned my head slightly to the left. There was no other light in the room except for the candles flickering across the room. They danced on the peach colored walls. The naked fire dancers, Lacey thought. The shapes shifting back and forth. Blink. Shift. Blink. Shift.
The tears began to run down her cheeks. Don't move, don't move, and don't move. Stupid, as soon as she could move she was going to punch Randall. This was his stupid idea, the entire night. He just wanted to be adventurous, "let's make love under the tree", he had pleaded. Pine needles were now poking her in the ass and all over her back. How is it you can ignore minor unpleasantness until you aren't allowed to move a muscle.
Now the Christmas Wreath scented candles, that just minutes ago were romantic and pleasant smelling were now cloying and almost nauseating to her. She desperately wanted to jump up and brush the pine needles off her skin, blow out the candles, and kick the fucking tree over. Oh, and punch Randall.
"Lace -- they should be here any second. Lacey?" He must have just realized that he had not heard her for minutes; nor could he see her from the kitchen, where he was standing on the phone.
"Uh, miss? I will be right back." Lacey heard him roughly drop the phone onto the kitchen table. Footsteps coming toward her. "Lacey? Hi baby, just wanted to make sure you were ok. Don't move, don't talk."
"Randall." Lacey whispered.
"Yes honey." He leaned in closer to hear her.
"When I get through this -- honey. I am going to kill you. Just letting you know now so you can pack and start running before they release me." It was so quiet you could hear a pin drop, or pine needles falling off the tree.
Blink. Flicker. Blink - blink as Randall stared at her.
"Did you hear me Ran?" She whispered as the tears began to flow again. "Please cover me with something before they get here." Just then they heard the sirens growing louder as they approached the house.
"Okay baby, here they come." Randall jumped up and carefully pulled the Christmas tree skirt out from under the tree and draped it over Lacey's nude body. "Shit!! The operator is still on hold." He muttered as he ran back to the kitchen.
Great, just fucking great Lacey thought. He put the itchy, pine needle infested Merry Fucking Christmas tree skirt with jolly fucking Saint Nick and his leaping, frolicking fucking reindeer on me!!! If the emergency responders all walk in here and laugh I will just die. If I was one of them I would just laugh my ass right off.
"They are here. Thank you so much for your help. Yup. I will. You have a nice holiday also." Randall laughed from the kitchen as he finished his conversation with the 911 operator and hung up the phone.
Footsteps, coming back towards her. The swoosh of the living room door opening as it brushed across the Happy Holidays carpet in front of the door. Randall opened the storm door and waved out the door. "Here, right here." Randall hollered. Cold air rushed across the bare, hardwood floor. Making her nipples rise to attention and goose bumps puckered across her flesh.
"Randall. You guys alright? Do you need any help? Want me to come in?" Lacey heard their nosy neighbor Mrs. Miller holler from next door as the ambulance pulled up.
"No Mrs. Miller. Thanks anyway! Lacey just isn't feeling well right now." Randall hollered back.
Lacey watched the flickering, naked fire dancers as they moved across her walls. Now they were dancing at the disco tech she thought. Her walls were now bathed in amber rotating flashes of light from the strobes on the ambulance.
Blink. Shift. Flash. Blink. Shift. Flash.
The time on the fireplace mantel said 12:34. Had it only been like five minutes she had been laying here? It felt like hours.
The sound of footsteps coming up the walk interrupted her. "Randall Milstone?" A masculine voice asked. "Did you call 911 for a sick person?" Ice crunched under boots, as they made their way to the house.
Great - Lacey thought. Men ambulance people. Couldn't she just get a couple of women? She felt her face redden and no one had crossed the threshold into her home. A steady stream of tears leaked from her eyes. The open door and cool air making her shiver more as the tears turned cold by the time they ran down her cheeks and pooled in her ears.
These fucking annoying pine needles!!! Whose inane idea had it been to get a live tree this year? Her brain storm or Randall's. She felt better the madder she got. She could do this. A quick trip to the hospital -- get this little problem taken care of and back here to bed. It would be a bad dream tomorrow morning, something to laugh about. She would be fine. She almost had dammed the tears; and then the lights turned on.
She heard more pine needles hit the hardwood floor as feet, and feet and more feet entered the living room.
Lacey could barely make out the hushed conversation at the door. ".....really embarrassing.....feeling romantic.......slipped in........didn't know what to do........." Randall's voice talking to the ambulance men. She couldn't see them. She was afraid to arch her neck to be able to see the front door.
"Lacey. I'm EMT Christian and this is EMT Mike. We are here to help you." He knelt by her side. Smiling. A nice smile -- not laughing -- yet.
He looked directly into her eyes. "We don't want you to move a muscle. Try to breath normally, don't laugh or sneeze or cough. We don't want you to do anything that would cause you to squeeze your abdominal muscles."
"Okay." She whispered.
"I will tell you everything I am going to do before I do it." EMT Christian's cool hand on her arm.
"Hi Lacey. I'm Mike." Mike introduced himself as he knelt above her head. His face floated into her field of vision.
"Hi Mike." She managed to choke out as the tears started to stream down her face again. More flashing lights and another siren.