My Marriage My Wife

Briefly My Marriage, My Wife.

Anyone who thinks that living in a one-sided open relationship is easy should think again, but at the same time if anyone finds such a way of life to be too difficult should for their own sanity and good health, stop. Luckily, I don't fall into either of those categories. So, how best to describe my marriage to my wonderful wife?

After some thought, I have decided to do so by answering questions similar to ones I saw posted in the form of a questionnaire on some a Literotica Forum.

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But before I do I want to make some observations on the nature of the comments I received for my first two offerings. Being a regular reader, I knew what to expect in the comments section from a certain quarter, nevertheless...

I invited my wife to read the accompanying comments for her take. To be honest she was surprised I had put fingers to keyboard in the first place and instinctively pointed out a few improvements she felt I could make before realising this was my work and not hers, and politely backing off with a pouty lip. We did have fun reading the comments together, she used a sexy voice to read some of the more complimentary comments and constructive advice out aloud and a mock angry voice to read out the more negative contributions. Instead of people watching, we were comment watching.

The comments I found most strange were for my second missive. Some commenters actually suggested, that as a boy I should have told my father of what I'd seen, that I should have been the one to break the news to him. Information that would have undoubtedly brought his life as he knew it crumbling down, and in doing so wrecked my parents' marriage. These commenters seemed to be suggesting without saying that I should have been willing to be separated from my father, as in a divorce that is the reality. When parents split up one parent leaves the home, and from what little I know mothers tend to come first both in the eyes of the law and in the eyes of children. I did clearly state that my big fear at the time was that my mother might leave, leave my father, perhaps leave me, leave home - so no, I wasn't about to bring that about by spilling the beans. I was a kid, perhaps a confused kid, but still a kid. Looking back, I can only imagine the counselling that might have been necessary in later life. Seems to me some people aren't happy unless they are unhappy lol.

Some commented I should have hated my uncle and I can see that thought process. But if by that logic I hated my uncle for what he was doing to my father, then by the same logic I should have loved him for obviously making my mother happy. In hindsight would hating my uncle have made any difference? One commenter even seemed upset that I later took a Saturday job at my uncle's garage - what would have been achieved from refusing to do so I don't know?

Anyway, commentators who wish to be negative, please note, we will read what you write and 'comment watch' with a sense amusement lol. Positive commenters, you get to imagine my wife's sexy dulcet tones reading your words as you type...

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So, let's begin, but before I do, I should point out two things. Firstly, I am trying not to give too much away as I want to submit more detailed posts over time. Secondly, having re-read my post I realise I have at times waxed lyrical and perhaps wrote in flowery terms about my wife. But heck, Sandy is my wife and I love her.

Without doubt I consider myself to be happily married. I live with the woman I love, a partner in life who makes me happy, makes me laugh, who's smile makes me smile, who turns me on and who, I swear, knows me better than I know myself. Okay I'm still smitten after all these years - sue me. I guess we complement one another. Sandy, my wife, effuses confidence, she is no pushover and will stand her ground and stick up for others - and for me. She is also a complicated and contradictory woman, and this I love that about her.

Of the two of us Sandy is the more extrovert, the more flirtatious, the more confrontational, the more self-assured and the more driven and she's not afraid to lead and not afraid to challenge. If Sandy has something on her mind she will say it. When we go out Sandy is the one to let loose, when she can be free to be free, she is a party animal, happy in the knowledge that I, her more reserved husband won't be so churlish to stop her enjoying herself. She also knows I am caring enough to keep an eye out for her. Being the more introvert I am happy enough looking on, happy to dance and smooch and be by her side as and when required. Personality wise I'm the more conservative, not so much quiet as quieter, and markedly less forward. Sometimes I just admire my wife's nerve or should I say her tenacity, whether it's complaining when she's not happy with something, getting a better table at a restaurant or haggling down the 'price' of a TV or car. I take pleasure from watching her in full flow, whether it be brow beating some hapless salesperson into a better deal who thought they were the bee's knees and dealing with a 'woman', or gossiping with friends about the latest scandal, or debating sports at the bar, or ribbing an opponent at the pool table. I just look on in awe and think 'she is so fucking beautiful, sassy and clever, why did she choose me?'

Together we make a good and formidable team, we care and want the best for each other, we have each other's backs, we try to sing from the same page. That's not to say we don't have our differences and arguments; we wouldn't be a married couple if we didn't - and we do have some doozies.

It will sound corny but we are devoted to one another. We put the work into communicating with one another, it might be a bit old fashioned in today's world but when our children lived at home we would sit down and have family meetings, and now it's the two of us we have couples' meetings. Sitting down to discuss what's going on helps to stop things sliding. I'll be honest I think I benefit more from this.

Even now, in our more mature years, we are sexually active and we are still adventuresome. We have sex and we make love, I like to think we differentiate between the two, sometimes one follows the other. Sandy is actively bi-sexual in practice, me more by circumstance, I partake but don't seek out. Safe to say that in and out of the bedroom we have done some very wild things.

All that being said, and despite the two of us having lived in an open relationship for most of our adult life I do, even now, still get a knot in my stomach when I know Sandy is going out on a date with someone she obviously likes. A him or a her that she finds attractive enough, fun enough and interesting enough to spend time with, to use that age old euphemism, 'sleep with'. The little devil of jealousy will always be there on one shoulder, always has been, whispering in my ear, sowing doubt and angst, and though I slap it down it still whispers...

But truth is, that doubt and that knot of angst is something I want; I like the insecurity, but more, I like knowing I am strong enough and trust her enough to overcome it and to let her do what she does. Maybe this is because deep down I know, despite all the what ifs, that she will return. Knowing that when my wife does come back, we will have our fun, that she will read me, gauge me, and give me exactly what I need. That she will honestly, if playfully and teasingly even tormentingly answer any questions I have, that she will share with me her experiences, and keep no secrets either by design or by omission.

I should stress that, though in our early years I was invariably left behind to babysit, and more recently left to read, do some hobby, watch TV, DIY or maybe go to the pub, I have never been or am not some forlorn downtrodden, down in the mouth unhappy husband stuck at home wringing my hands, waiting on edge eagerly for her to come home. Well, okay, I do eagerly await her return.

What I am trying to get across is I am more than happy with my life. And more than happy with our relationship.

In the early days of the eighties and even into the noughties we relied on verbal teasing to keep me informed of what she'd been up to. But then, thanks to technology and I-phones I would also get lots of texts and visual and verbal updates. Videos that can be replayed by myself or with Sandy over and over.

When Sandy does return from her dates, the things I LOVE to hear her say as she breezes through, stumbles through or creeps through our door are, 'I'm back sweetheart...' 'You still up...?' 'I love you...' 'Wow that was awesome...' 'Wow he/she was awesome...' 'You'd love him/her, I'll have to introduce you...' 'Did you miss me...?' 'Gracious, is that the time...?' 'Come on - I need you...' 'I think you should take me to bed right now...' 'Perhaps I should shower first...?' 'Is that a boner I see...?' 'Give me a kiss...'

I truly do enjoy the time we spend reconnecting; this is where I get my chance to play my wife like a fiddle, where she lets me have free reign, and before long I will have Sandy begging, screeching, laughing - ordering me to stop teasing - then we ravish one another. The times I've not been able to help myself and to her delight just fucked her up against the wall before she's even had chance to take her coat off as if to show her, she's mine lol.

Has my wife had lots of affairs, well the answer to that is 'yes', how many - stopped counting years ago. But she has slowed down. Even though it now takes a bigger toll on her Sandy still enjoys the occasional one-night stand, that's if when she gets chatted up, she likes them enough, she's always up for an impromptu rough and ready dirty fuck up against a wall down some alley or in a back room, or in the back of a car, or in some club. Nowadays though, most of my wife's relationships are more considered, even so they rarely last more than a few weeks, a few months at most. In all our years together, the longest extra marital relationship she was involved in lasted five years, but he was the exception, he was far older than us, his name was Harry and she was definitely emotionally attached to him. Sandy was more his mistress; and though he knew she saw others besides him, he still called her his third wife. But I'm happy to say the feelings she had for him were never a danger to us, she saw the danger of their closeness for us and went out of her way to make sure I knew I came first. It also helped that I got on well with Harry and never thought he was trying to take Sandy from me which made things easier on me. Sadly, our adventures with Harry ended when he died. I will write about Harry - I will ask Sandy first.

Do we consider my wife's lovers to be Bulls? Well, while the sexual connotations that come with such a word or title can be fun, it really depends on the individual. If the individual is confident enough to carry such a label off, then yes and she will respond to him 'or her' as such - if not then her lover is just a passing fancy.

Does my wife take lovers from people we know or stick to complete strangers? We felt it best and made a decision to avoid friends, too many complications, although lovers have become friends... For some reason though, colleagues, both hers and mine, remained fair game. Sandy has been blunt in the past saying she likes knowing that someone I'm working alongside has fucked her, she rightly tells me I enjoy that added humiliation - but this only happens 'organically' or if she is approached by someone she likes and she has okayed it with me - again stories for another time.

So, most of my wife's beaus are not usually people I personally know beforehand, most are strangers to me. Sandy does meet men when we are out together, if she sees someone that she likes she will not hesitate to flirt and in doing so invite an approach, get a number. Sandy likes to be approached, Sandy likes to be seduced - and if a man is willing and brazen enough to make any such approach 'under my nose' so to speak then he passes one of her tests and is almost assured of a positive response whether it goes further or not.

Occasionally, when Sandy is involved with someone that I don't know and whom she thinks I will like, and she thinks they will be up for it, she will engineer a situation where we meet. Sandy will take us out and 'fortuitously' we'll 'accidently' bump into her lover. Sometimes she will openly introduce him or her to me as her lover, and me to him or her, as her husband. More often though she'll simply introduce them as a 'friend' and leave it hanging. She will expect me to exchange pleasantries, she will watch me closely, expect me to play my part. Usually, I will know of such meetings in advance, but sometimes she likes to surprise me and whisper or brazenly spill the beans during. He or she has probably been forewarned to expect my presence so as not to scare, Sandy is open with me about how she likes conspiring with them, hopefully giving them a 'kick'. I know such situations turn Sandy on as she's been more than open with me about the 'kick' it gives her - and afterwards I do benefit, I too get my reward.

There's a game we play where I become the third wheel and I am more or less ignored, excluded. This can be when she gets chatted up by someone she's just met and who is invited to join us, or when were with one of her lovers we've gone out with - she knows I like this game. Occasionally she'll signal me to go, or just wait for me to go to the toilet and then suggest to her lover that they sneak away. More than once I have returned to an empty table following a visit to the toilets to find a napkin or a page ripped from a note book left tucked under my glass, or had a smiling waitress come up and hand me a note, a note Sandy has hurriedly written. Sometimes a verbal message accompanies the note, 'Your wife got called away on an emergency.' The note will invariably inform me she's off and I am to make my own way home, or it will tell me where they have gone on to and that I am to follow and catch up.

If my wife feels the chemistry is right then her extra marital 'fling' can lead to all kinds of dynamics involving me, which I am not averse to. Sometimes Sandy and I will go together to meet her lover socially, meet up at social events, parties, BBQ's either with me as a knowing 'cuckold' or as the unknowing oblivious husband. It's amazing how many men get a kick out of thinking they are pulling the wool over some 'poor' unsuspecting husband's eyes, and it weirdly gives me a kick to know this is what they are thinking. The double-entendres Sandy will encourage are fun as I feign ignorance. I find it humiliating and exhilarating - which Sandy knows. Sandy tells me it can improve her boyfriend or girlfriends' performance no end, spur them on, they adopt a more aggressive and daring approach to their sexual trysts - which she likes.

Some might be thinking Sandy is a manipulator. I just believe she likes everyone to be happy, likes everyone to get something out of what's happening.

When my wife takes a lover does she meet with them regularly? The answer to that is yes and no. Some might be monthly meet ups, others reconnecting one offs after having previously parted on good terms, sometimes years ago. Most are weekly. In the midst of an affair or tryst there will be daily phone calls, lots of texting and sexting - and circumstances allowing, she and her lover get together as often as they decide to. Sandy prefers regular dates, she likes a structured affair while it lasts, what she doesn't like is having too many balls in the air, she isn't keen on juggling. While Sandy will usually make her way home after most dates, even if it means getting back in in the early hours, occasionally she will call to let me know she is stopping over. I know by the excuse she gives whether the other person is present and listening in or not, and if they know I know what she's up to. Sandy will sometimes go away for a daytrip or a weekend, if she does, she will leave her itinerary with contact details under a refrigerator magnet - in case of emergencies.

Sandy has gone on Holiday with a lover - six times, five of those times were with Harry.

Where does my wife meet up with her lovers? Well anywhere but home, that was one thing we agreed early on, well to be honest something I insisted she didn't do. I told her I wanted 'our' home to be 'our' home, to be our space. So, she'll fuck in cars, restrooms, indoors, outdoors, her lovers place, hotels, motels, cabins, Airbnb, Bed and Breakfast, perhaps a place of natural beauty or a place of historical interest, she is a member of the mile high club... Or maybe it'll just be in an impromptu location such as an office or cupboard.

When Sandy is planning to meet up with a lover, I am usually aware - one of our rules - no secrets, if I am informed after the tryst, then she owes me lol. Sometimes I am present, this can be in the form of a threesome, it can be me 'spying' for want of a better word, and sometimes, if the lover is of the right disposition I have been known to play the part of a 'useful' husband. 'Useful' hides a myriad of connotations for what can happen and over the years I have probably and willingly experienced most indignities and deprivations with me and Sandy having our own safe word which I can use if I become uncomfortable. I can't recall using it. Again, adventures for a later date.

I can honestly say our lifestyle as it is has enhanced our intimacy, has made us better communicators, and having lovers has definitely kept her young, active, fashionable, and kept me on my toe's fitness and health wise - especially romance wise. I like being her rock.

Do we have sex? We have lots of sex, but we do differentiate between having sex and making love. We have a healthy physical and emotional relationship. I try not to get into a mindset where I feel I have to compete with her lovers, she's seeking different things from her lovers and her trysts than what she has with me. She doesn't want or expect acrobatics and night long performances from me.

Sandy has never encouraged me to compete, she didn't like it when initially I used to try to, she would get annoyed with me and still gets mad if she feels I'm overdoing things to try and make some point. We, she realised that this kind of behaviour on my part wasn't healthy for us. Besides I had a small heart attack ten years go which scared Sandy more than me and she openly says that was the most frightening time for her. We have what we have and we enjoy what we have, we do what suits us and makes us happy. I am unable to use Viagra but I do masturbate, a lot, she masturbates me even more. We have our own traditions, she likes to masturbate me using a pair of her panties, preferably a pair she's just wore on a date or a pair she hasn't washed since a date, sometimes though they'll be crisp and clean. She likes to talk dirty to me, recall her adventures, loves to cruelly embellish in order to please and tease me. We do watch porn together, although I also watch porn by myself especially if she is away, but then we have a collection of her own.

Has our sex life changed at all? Well, we have slowed down and I'm no longer the rooster I once was, mother nature has taken its course, age having caught up with me faster than it has with my wife. Sandy is literally the Victoria Secrets model Milf, or Gilf as she now is. Yes, mother nature has favoured Sandy.

Sandy can literally pass for being ten years my junior - if not more, she wouldn't be out of place adorning some millionaire's yacht. I like that my friends and work colleagues call Sandy my trophy wife, and Sandy happily boasting that she's my arm candy. She will joke with me, tease that she might have to put me out to pasture, she'll also chuckle and tell me she's a vampire, but instead of feasting on the blood of hapless victims, it's the sex and the semen and the pussy juices that are keeping her young.