It was in the June, some six months or so after my husband of thirteen years and I had parted. Well actually I had kicked him out after finding out for the third time he’d been cheating on me. I’d been devastated. I had thought that, despite the earlier disappointments when I’d found out about his playing away, that we’d overcome those problems That we’d now sail into the sunset of early middle age with Sarah our daughter putting the troubles behind us. But with serial adulterers who seem to have the need to regularly convince themselves they aren’t ageing and are able to find a regular queue of leggy twenty somethings ready to drop their panties at the flash of a gold Amex or open their legs with the opening of a Porsche’s door it’s never like that.
In those six months I’d struggled to build my new life. One of a single mum, one where there were few real friends for most had been “our “ friends, not mine. And so many of our male friends during those six months seemed to have suddenly found out that they’d fancied me for such a long time and that their wives didn’t understand them, that the subsequent fighting them off ruptured any chance of continuing the “friendships” with me single.
So I was building the new life. Setting up a new home for Sarah and me, going back to work as a freelance copywriter, The new life, though hadn’t yet involved other men. I just couldn’t bring myself to accept the, reassuringly in some ways, fairly large and frequent offers I received. It didn’t seem right while we waited for the divorce and it could well adversely affect the relationship I had with Sarah that was now the most precious thing in the world to me. So after all those years of a generally satisfying sex life with Kevin suddenly there was none. Since my sexual awakening in my late teens I had never really suffered from frustration and hardly really knew what it was and certainly didn’t really know what it felt like. But in those six months I learned. I experienced the nagging needs in my body, the feelings of wanting to be held and cuddled, caressed and stroked and yes of course fucked. The times I laid in my bed thinking of nothing else than being fucked. The times I laid there actually fucking myself.
It was tremendously difficult but I was surviving. I had promised myself that I would stay away from men until the divorce came through and then I’d become a modern woman. One of the 21st century that can fuck men and leave ‘em just as they fuck and leave us. “Roll on the next few months until it’s finalized,” I often thought as I so often made love to myself.
We’d known Mike and Carey for several years. They aren’t amongst our closest friends as a couple for I had met her years ago and she and I always got on well so when she paired up with Mike, we saw them from time to time as a foursome They were both in advertising and we saw them fairly regular, well seeing them fairly regular meant going out to dinner on average every other month, but Carey and I talked on the phone frequently and had girly lunches at least monthly It was Carey who’d persuaded me to take the freelance job and probably they had been the most supportive couple since the break up. She was slim, blonde and beautiful and he was dark, tallish and handsome in a slightly Balkans way, black hair and lots of it, swarthy features and piercing dark eyes. Both had recently had their 40th birthdays so they were a couple of years older than me but, like me, they could pass for several years younger.
“Why not escape one week-end with us Mand,” Carey had said over a glass of wine one lunchtime, “and come up to the cottage in Norfolk.”
So there I was bombing up the M11 in my brand new BMW 323 convertible. The weather was unusually warm, so I had the hood down and with Sarah at my mum’s for the entire week-end my troubles and worries seemed to decrease as I rapidly ate up the miles between me and home.
The satnav on the BMW worked perfectly getting me through the winding lanes around the Broads in Norfolk to deposit me outside the most charming thatched cottage imaginable.
“You have arrived,” the slightly annoying voice advised from me from the speakers as I pulled into the gravel driveway.
We had a lovely Saturday. We had a light lunch after I arrived. After that we had a lazy afternoon around the small pool in our swim suits soaking up the sun, chatting and gossiping about mutual friends. We then had a delightful dinner at a local pub that was within walking distance so there was no worries about drinking and driving. We took advantage of that having three bottles of wine between us.
Walking home all of us dressed in shorts and tees, Mike was in the middle and he put his arms around both of us as we laughed and joked the few hundred yards through the failing light back to the cottage. Brandies in our hands we sat in the cosy lounge listening to music in candlelight and, inevitably I guess, the conversation turned to Kevin and me. I found myself opening up to them and telling them more about the background and how I felt. This, for some reason, included my feelings about dating and even touched on the loneliness and how much I missed being with a man. I guess the wine and the talk made me a little morbid and I started to cry. Whilst I’d done plenty of that in the first couple of months it had now been some time since I’d broken down and I said I was sorry but both of them were so kind and understanding that my heart went out to such good friends.
Carey came and sat right next to me on the sofa and put her arms around me as Mike said consoling words and told me what a silly and cruel bastard Kevin was. They made me feel better and being so close to Carey, for she kept her arms round me, was strangely comforting and the tearfulness passed as I sipped my brandy.
“Well I reckon it’s time I showed you where things are upstairs Mandy,” she said, adding, “then we’ll get you tucked upion bed shall we, this Norfolk air is very tiring?”
Smiling I replied, “Yes mum,” and we all laughed.
She showed me where the bathroom was and how to open the windows with the burglar proof locks and then into the bedroom that was quite small but beautifully furnished with a double bed. I undressed, slipped on a long tee shirt that I sometimes wear in bed, and went to the bathroom and cleaned my teeth. Back in my room I’d just slipped under the single sheet, for it was still very warm, when there was a knock on the door and Carey called out as she opened the door,
“Everything OK Mandy?” .
“Yes great, I’m fine now,” I smiled at my friend as she came into the room wearing a lacy nightdress that was very low at the front.
“Good, I’m pleased,” she replied coming over and sitting on the side of the bed.
We talked for a while about the divorce and how things had changed for me and I said how lucky she and Mike were to be in such a loving relationships. She was sitting very close to me so that my leg under the sheet was pressed against her hips and as she moved or leaned forward the loose top of her nightdress would gape and I couldn’t avoid seeing down it. Several times I saw most of her small breasts and twice I saw her nipples as well. I didn’t think anything of it for we were close friends and I’d showered with her after playing tennis and even this afternoon she’d sunbathed topless.
“Can anyone join in?” I heard Mike saying from outside the door which he’d tapped upon discretely before putting his head round it..
“Sure, the more the merrier,” I responded pulling the sheet up a little. I was aware that the thin tee shirt was stretched fairly tightly across my breasts and that most likely the outline of my large nipples would be showing through it. He walked in carrying the bottle of cognac and three balloon glasses.
“Perhaps a nightcap ladies?” he asked plopping himself down on the other side of the bed to Carey.
“Please,” we both said as he poured them out.
“You know Mand,” Mike said seriously, “Kevin must have been absolutely barmy to have let you go by being so fucking stupid, mustn’t he Carey?
“Yes” my friend replied lifting her hand and running the back of fingers across my cheek. “bloody stupid to lose such a gorgeous and lovely woman.”
They were making feel a little weepy again with their so encouraging and loving support.
