I was new in town. My husband seemed to be working all the time. I knew he'd be away often and for long periods, but he stayed away even when he was within traveling distance. I hadn't yet found full time work so I was very lonely.
While I was on the computer one afternoon, an ad for an internet dating site popped up. I wasn't interested in dating, so to speak, but maybe.....my mind wandered for a bit, thinking about the possibilities.
I signed up. I made it very clear in my profile that I was attached and not looking to change that. I stated clearly that I was looking for one partner, I had no desire to 'sleep around', I just needed something more... some intimacy, some human touch, a little companionship. When I checked again about a day later I had received so many responses, so many that I was overwhelmed. I tried reading through, but one caught my attention.
His profile, it said, was not available to be viewed, whatever the term was I forget. He had sent a simple email. I think that's what attracted me to it. Very simple, straight forward, he said he was looking for the same. I replied.
We messaged for a few days. I was having doubts about what I was doing, I told him. I had never done anything like this before and now that I had initiated it, I was feeling very nervous. He was great, very patient, very gentle. We decided to meet at the local coffee shop instead of going right to a motel room.
I was so nervous as I got ready to meet Andy for the first time. I showered at least twice. I discarded many outfits before deciding on a simple top and shorts. I put on a little makeup, and went to meet him. Of course, I was very early. I knew he was coming from work and wouldn't be there until 12:15. I almost left a few times, but I stayed, and waited.
Andy had the afternoon off. He had been on sick leave at work, and was just starting back on half days for a couple of weeks before going back full time. I knew what vehicle to expect. When he pulled in, I recognized him immediately. He came over to my truck. I was so nervous that I could hardly speak. Within a few moments, I suggested that we go to the motel after all. I followed him to a lot across from the motel. He picked me up and I drove over with him. I couldn't quite make myself park at the motel, yet.
I was very nervous and having second thoughts. He went to register, and then we went into the room. I was very quiet. I went and sat on the bed and wondered what to do next. He sat down across from me. He started a casual conversation. It worked, I started to relax and we had a nice chat. Then I blurted out that I was so nervous, like that wasn't obvious to him. I was very shy. He said we could do anything at my pace, or we could chat and do nothing at all. He was very patient. He leaned over for a kiss, and that kiss just melted me.
All the doubts vanished. I was still a little shy. We were both still fully dressed. I moved over toward the centre of the bed though, as I put my arms around him and opened my mouth, inviting him to deepen the kiss. His kiss was soft, gentle, probing but not insisting. It was so inviting, I felt myself pulling him closer, wanting to be enveloped by the kiss. We broke the kiss, but not the contact. I kissed his cheek, around to his ear and gently bit his ear lobe, moved down to let my lips caress his neck.
We were breathing a little heavier now, well, I was breathing a little heavier now. He pulled away slightly. He was looking into my eyes as he asked if I was ready to go a little further. Oh yes, I was ready. We slowly undressed each other. The tv was on in the background.
He was naked first, and I couldn't get my fill of his body. He is tall, very well built. I hesitated to undress further. I had never been naked in front of very many people, and I started to feel very self conscious, very shy. Andy came over to me, and wrapping his arms around me, he kissed me. It was a very slow, very thorough, gentle kiss. As he pulled back to look at me, I smiled and let him finish undressing me.