Married Sex Life 6 Be Unfaithful

"All husbands secretly want their wives to be unfaithful to them.'

Howard Jacobsen "The Act of Love"

Those who have followed my thread of my married sexual relationship since last summer will understand my enjoyment in sharing my wife with another man, which I have done three times. Each was an erotic masterpiece of exquisite agony and ecstasy -- sexually sharing a precious partner with another is delicious and frightening. Watching her lay back and open herself to him, to allow him to penetrate her, to reach inside her deepest parts leaving his seed inside is utterly and agonisingly wonderful. Then to enter her myself, to feel her heat and liquid wetness, to fuck the competing seed back out of her with each thrust, to reclaim her body and soul has been the key to so much erotic pleasure: reclaiming her heart, and pushing him out of her body in all ways.

Except, writing down my recollections last summer here on Literotica opened up whole new avenues for me trying to understand my fetish and the intensity of my feelings around sharing Kate and fantasising about it at every opportunity.

I started to feel that my perception of love of 30 years is inseparable from the fear of loss or abandonment; and having accepted that the feeling of loss or abandonment as the a conclusion of love, I now have learnt to court it. I am turned on by betrayal, but I seek to control the betrayal, I relish the cuckoldry as a voyeur in our own bedroom. Kate has always said that I am never more sexually alive than when imagining that she is fucking somebody else.

Where this feeling comes from interested me and bothered me in equal measures. Was it in fact a peculiarly perverse sort of emotional masochism, or a underlying homoerotic desire for the third man?

So, last September, after I recorded our sexual past here on Literotica, I went to see a psycho therapist, a woman psych, who I laid this story before in a search of my own self-understanding.

This psych explained that I was not unusual in my desires. She was in no way surprised and highlighted that we live in a highly "pornified" sexual landscape, and men can't help but be influenced, by some process of osmosis, the no-holds-barred reality of sex they see projected in front of them in pornogrpahy. It follows that repeated exposure to such exaggerated sexual responses and activities would lead them to include fantasies of their own wives being involved in such boundless, ecstatic sex.

When a heterosexual man imagines his wife with other men, visualizing her breaking their marital vows for his sexual gratification, there's a lot going on that might be called 'transgressive.' Willingly imagining himself as a cuckold, and yet fully in control of his own cuckoldry, brings with it a sense of the 'forbidden', which is sexy in itself, in the outrageousness of it.

The wife as an object of sex has an appeal for a vast number of men, and particularly attractive is the thought of someone having sex with here without abandon, without control, cementing her as a purely sexual entity, desired by many, but, when all is said and done, still belonging to him. In this mindset, the fantasy of his wife being lusted after by other virile men, perhaps more virile than him, bestows a kind of power on him over those men.

It's almost like showing off. To men who fall into this category, the thought of passing his wife round to another man, or men, is like handing the keys to his new Ferrari to another for a test drive in the knowledge that the man could never have it for himself.

She also explained that once a romantic relationship has been domesticated, much of its original lustre may become tarnished. So if, through fantasy, a husband succeeds in imagining his wife as a passionate, two-dimensional sex object, such a manner of "un-domesticating" her can restore some of the electric lust now possibly missing for him.

The therapist summarised our sessions by pointing out that it may seem to go against the conventional grain for a man to sexualise and be turned on by the thought of another male having sex with his wife or, perhaps worse yet, offering her for another's pleasure. Traditionally, such a man would be humiliated, so why then should he then create a fantasy in which that very thing happened? In short, because the creation of a fantasy is ownership of it: however scandalous it is, to invent a sexual scenario is to exert a kind of mastery over it.

I completed my series of sessions with the psych in the autumn last year feeling very much more at ease with my sexual past and, importantly, wanted to reopen myself to enjoying the same experiences again. All I had to do was convince Kate, who claimed that at 57 she was too old for that game and only just managed our own weekly weekend sex these days.

Kate had tackled menopause with no HRT or any meds, so she relied on just her own previously strong sexual urges. We used to be able to get wildly aroused by just brushing up against each other, but these days longer foreplay and seduction is required. Nice hotels, hot sun, no responsibilities still work their magic with her...oh, and exercise. Kate wild swims every week with a bunch of folk near us and while I go to the gym on Thursdays, she goes to the beach or local ponds. Now. Bear with me, the wild swimming is important.

Kate chatted with her mates at the swimming, all women of similar age, and discovered that HRT was not a big problem and that it could help with all the complexities of menopause, especially with libido and everything related to getting turned on for sexual intercourse. Kate's mate Anna told her she was on a heady cocktail of hormones including testosterone and now she was as randy as a four balled tomcat! Kate went to see her private gynae lady and she happily prescribed the HRT for her and also suggested wickedly that she might want to make sure that her husband had enough Viagra.

Well, dear Reader, it worked.

Kate was on the treatment for a week or so when we went out to dinner one Friday. I was emphasizing the seduction with champagne in the bath before we went out and more in the restaurant. By the dessert, Kate was not interested in any pudding except my cock. She even excused herself to go to the ladies, returning with her black panties in her hand which she passed to me. By the time the taxi got us home, she was quietly rubbing my cock through my trousers and playing with her hair.

At home, she was like a sexual bomb going off. We were mainly undressed by the stairs, she sucked me on the bottom step and then presented her bare arse while bent at the waist on the stairs. I slid straight into her doggy style and she was as wet as when she was 20. We fucked from behind for a while, before she pushed me away and ran up the staircase to our bedroom.

Every position, every hole, every conceivable grip -- we fucked, licked, sucked and wanked for ages. Eventually I came deep inside her, so she demanded her favourite vibrator to carry on wanking. She came so hard with me and with the rabbit, only falling asleep after I had tackled her clit with my tongue and her vibrating bullet.

We woke early, around 5am, in each others arms, our bodies sticking together with sweat and cum and started to gently kiss and nuzzle. I decided this was the moment to reintroduce my fantasy and float a new idea with Kate. I wanted her to have an affair with our old friend Alan, to rekindle that spark and allow herself to have a full blown sexual affair with our friend, that would be known to me but not to him. I wanted him to think he had seduced her on his own at last and that I did not know. It would be exquisite to know that he was being deceived but also that he thought he had one over me at last.

Readers, Kate was very still and silent as I explained my therapy sessions and the fantasy and the scenario, all the while stroking my arms enfolding her as we spooned. My erection was full and hard against her back so she knew how much this idea turned me on. but she remained silent. Suddenly, I wondered if I had over stepped a mark.

(to be continued)