We were at, or getting close to our wits end. Trying to start a family for five years had really made it difficult to enjoy a normal sex life.
We had tried everything. Diet, changing style of underwear, IVF, the lot, but we came down to one thing and that was that my sperm count was lower than a snakes goolies. So AI by donor was the next and it seemed the only option. We were referred to a clinic and sat down with a consultant, he explained the process in stainless steel clarity of detail and then just as we were about to sign he gave us the list of disclaimers. It was just beyond belief. Basically we could not be sure that we were not going to end up with a mixed race baby.
Please don't get us wrong, we are not racists, but since we were not planning to tell anyone that I cannot father a child, having a coloured baby was not an option and the clinic would not give us any confidence on the issue. In fact the disclaimer basically said "if we screw up then it's your problem." They just seemed interested in taking their fat fee and covering themselves with legal garbage. We felt we could not trust them at all.
We left the clinic very depressed. On the way home we stopped at a nearby pub for a drink. Trying to make light of the situation I jokingly suggested that Wendy seduce the barman. "Well at least we can see him and know roughly what the baby will look like." she responded, moodily.
As she spoke, she looked up as if inspiration had just hit her. She jumped up and grabbed my hand. "Come on, we have to talk and we can't do that here." and with that she dragged me out of the pub.
We got home and Wendy flew around the kitchen like a tornado, getting dinner. She put two bottles of wine on the table and we sat down.
"OK, what is this about?" I asked.
"What kind of baby do we want if it can't be yours?" she grilled me.
"Good looking, fairly clever and one that no-one will realise is not mine." I said after a bit of thought. "And" I added, "from a donor that will never trouble us in the future."
"Good point, so where will we find someone that is clever, handsome and without any sense of responsibility?"
"Oh god I don't know, the only people that I can think of that are like that are all in univer............sity." I stopped as I realised where Wendy was going in this plan. "You mean that we could find a biological father from the local uni?"
"Yes, thats it! Don't you see......? They are perfect. All bright healthy virile young men, the baby would inherit some clever genes and what is the best part is that once we have what we want we need never see them again, in fact they wont know where or who we are!"
"I really doubt that part about the lack of any interest." I said sceptically.
"Look" she reasoned, "What kind of women are out there? Think it through."
"I don't know what you are driving at." I stammered
"Well I think there are probably four kinds - One are the virgins. Men might like a virgin as they know that no-one else has been there, OK?" I nodded.
"Two -- there are unattached females. Men are interested because they are faithful OK?" I nodded again.
"Three -- there are promiscuous women, sluts if you like. Men will fuck them but run a mile afterwards. The less clever men tend to go for them."
"Four -- there are unfaithful wives. Men like them because they are a good safe fuck and if they get pregnant the husband picks up the tab right?" I nodded. I was beginning to see the plan.
I interrupted her -- "OK so if you are planning to go out and fuck a student I presume you are in category four, but don't forget you won't know these guys, one could still be dangerous."
"Well remember that we were told that the chances of conception increase when I hit orgasm?" I nodded, "Well then, I thought that with me somewhere between type 3 and 4, we are a couple that likes to play and you are there to make sure that I orgasm and I will get pregnant for certain, plus if you are there I will be safe as well."
"I need to think about this." I said, and took her hand and led her up to bed, where we made love for ages.
Over the next few days my mind was spinning. I was thrilled that we might actually manage to conceive a child and the idea of watching my wife being fucked was beginning to turn me on big time.
By Friday I felt like I had my head around the concept, so over dinner I raised the subject. "I have been thinking about what you said the night after we went to the clinic."
I saw Wendy's eyes light up, "And?"
"Well I think that there are more reasons to go for it than not go for it, but I still have my doubts."
"What are they darling?" she pouted.
"Well mainly I want to be certain that you won't get a taste for young randy students."
"I promise I wont do that, I am yours forever and I just want us to have a baby, OK?"
"OK, when shall we start?"
She leapt right into it - "This weekend is my most fertile time, so let's go tonight! -- Cambridge isn't far, we can be there in 30 minutes. I have a few things packed ready and in the car, come on, finish dinner and I can be the pudding!"
We burst into hysterical laughter and stopping only to pick up some cash and car keys, we left dinner and ran out to the car.
By eight o'clock we were in Cambridge and looking for a pub with a lot of bicycles outside. With luck there was a Travel Lodge near the centre so we quickly checked in and asked about local pubs. The dopey receptionist said there was a pub just down the street which was frequented by students so after dumping our bags in the room we almost ran down the road to the "Original Oak." We wandered in and saw a group playing bar billiards in the corner. Wendy made a gesture to me to get us both a drink, which I did while she went over to the group gathered around the bar billiards table. "Can I play?" I just about heard her ask as I got the attention of the barmaid and ordered our drinks.
When I had got the drinks I went over to the group, now including my wife and gave Wendy her drink. She took it without a word. "Hey Wendy, it's your turn!" one of them called out, offering her a cue.
"OK, you will have to show me what to do, how do I hold this thing Gareth?" Gareth positioned the cue in her hands and held her hips until she was stood in front of the table. Then he reached around her and guided her hands on the cue. Wendy played up to him and nudged him with a wiggle of her hips.
After a while Wendy was getting into the game and also getting on really well with her new friends. One of them asked where we were staying and Wendy told them about the Travel Lodge. "We have a lovely little room -- you must all come back for a drink later." she said with a twinkle in her eye and giving Gareth a squeeze of his hand. I looked at my watch -- it was nearly ten o'clock.
"But darling", I interrupted her, "it will soon be your bed time."
"Oh yes, you are right. We must go soon, who wants to come with us for a drink before bed time?"
The atmosphere suddenly changed. It was like there was anticipation hanging in the air. All four of the boys watched as Wendy went to the bar and asked if she could buy something to take out and came away with a bottle of Southern Comfort and a bottle of vodka. She held them in the air. "Come on then, who is coming with us?" She marched out of the bar, stopping only to look flirtaceously over her shoulder to make sure that we were all following.
It was only two hundred yards to the hotel and using the key, because the receptionist had now gone off duty, I let us all in and led the way to our room. We were at the very end of a long corridor. When we got to our room I opened the door and Wendy went in. Gareth stopped and spoke to me. "Is she going to er ...... I mean with all of......right now?". I smiled and nodded. He started walking again. By the time we went in she had removed her jacket and had arranged cups and glasses.
She was standing by the bed giggling loudly and had started undoing the buttons on her blouse. Next she removed her earrings. "Pour me a drink would you?" She said to Gareth, "I am going to slip into something more comfortable." She threw her blouse at him and nipped into the bathroom carrying the small overnight bag we had brought.
All of us men stood around drinking Southern Comfort or Vodka. One of them, David I think, asked me if we were married. I told him we were. "Then why are you doing this?"