Love Letters in the Attic

This is my latest endeavor into the pain, misery, and sadness that betrayal can cause one or both of the married spouses, not to mention the eventual spillover to friends, family, kids, and basically every part of your life. This is chapter 1, and chapter 2 is still on the drawing board. Like any of my stories, if a reader feels moved to write a follow up, and create more closure from their perspective, I welcome that but would like to be contacted so that I can follow up on the story and perhaps gain another perspective of how the characters proceed.

I am happy to say that blackrandl1958 took on the burden of editing this story for me, and I appreciate her talents and instruction in how to improve my writing and grammar skills. It is now a much better read than it was.

LOVE LETTERS IN THE ATTIC CH01

The sweat generated by the humidity and heat in the unfinished attic of my 2-bedroom house was really starting to flow and it would soon be coursing its way down my face, likely making a brief but painful detour via my eyes, before dripping onto the floor and my t-shirt. It was 80 degrees outside, a perfect Minneapolis summer day and my original plans had been to get up, make my wife and daughter some pancakes and sausage and, having built up some brownie points, beg off for the day and talk my best friend Jerry into a round of golf.

We had purchased our house five years ago, and we had always planned on putting enough sweat equity into it by adding a third bedroom, which would increase our resale value and allow us to have more space for an eventual addition to our family. That day, sweat equity seemed to be a very appropriate label.

My wife, Diane, had already planned on taking our 3-year-old bundle of excitement, little Beth, to her mother's house for what they liked to call "a three generation of the girls" get together, so I had the whole day to myself. My golf plans were reluctantly altered as I thought back to the day before and the last few days in general.

The previous afternoon when I came home from work, as I walked in the door, Diane grabbed my briefcase, set it down on the hall tree, took my hand and led me to the living room couch. Before we even said hello's, she pushed me down on the couch, and said, "Okay, James, Beth is next door at the Jensen's playing with Tracy, so while we have a bit of time, I want you to get those pants off right now! I have a special welcome home treat for you. And in case you are wondering, yes, I am about to have my way with you."

Picking up on her goofy demeanor, I replied, "Well hello to you too, Diane. I'm at your disposal; be gentle with me but do what you must!"

"Oh, kind sir, this won't hurt you and I can assure you that in your future you may often get "lucky" when you walk through that door of your castle to the beckoning loins of your Queen. So, what say Yee, my King? Prepare to be ravaged."

We both laughed as Diane pulled down my pants and underwear, bent over and kissed the tip of my penis. It didn't take long for my cock to stand at attention, as Diane took me into her mouth and sucked and stroked me. I was about to come when she winked at me, stood up, turned around, pulled down her yoga pants, sat her freshly shaven pussy onto my cock and started riding me like she was sitting in a saddle. I reached up with one hand, grabbed her left breast and started to pinch her nipple, as my right hand moved down to her pussy and rubbed her clit while she rode up and down my shaft.

As Diane pumped harder and faster and I rubbed her clit harder and faster, she started to moan and shake and her pussy flooded my cock with her lovely, tasty orgasm. I groaned, flexed my thighs and shot my load into her with a shudder and a moan of my own. "My God, Diane, that was incredible. What did I do to deserve that welcome home, or perhaps I should ask what did you do?"

"Just showing you, Jimmy, how much I love you and how horny and turned on you make me. I've been thinking about that orgasm and your penis planted inside me all afternoon, and you surely did not disappoint, my big strong stud muffin." She broke out laughing as she turned, and said, "Let me get you a beer and you might want to think about pulling up those pants. What if someone comes to the door?" she chortled as she pulled up her yoga pants, swung her butt in a sexy exaggerated sway and walked away.

I was in heaven, but I was also feeling very curious about what was driving this behavior. This was the third night in a row, either right after work or after Beth went to bed, that Diane had virtually attacked me and fucked me with what I could only describe as an animal intensity. The last two nights we had fucked, then made love, then fucked again in the morning so by my count, this was the eighth time in three days that I had deposited a big load in her pussy. She would usually let me come in her mouth, at least a few times over that many orgasms, and on occasion, she let me come in, or at least on her ass, but this was strictly into her pussy with almost a thirst of intensity that was freaking me out. I wasn't sure if something or someone was stirring up her juices and I was just fulfilling her fantasy, or what was going on.

We had always been open and honest with each other, at least I thought we had, especially since we had gotten by a rough period in our marriage lasting three months; now almost four years ago, right after we begin discussing starting a family, and getting pregnant. I decided that there was no way for me to guess what was happening, so I was just going to have to come right out and ask her.

I walked into the kitchen as Diane was opening my Fair State Vienna Lager, and without ceremony said, "Diane, what the hell is going on? This is the third day in a row that you've attacked me like a panther in heat, and I guess it's got me confused, maybe even a bit worried. Do you have anything you need to tell me? We've always said that it's much better to confess and talk things out than to harbor secrets that can eat away at a marriage's foundation, and I guess I just need to ask you honestly what's going on?"

"James, nothing's going on. You know that I love you. I chose you to be my soulmate for life, and nothing could ever change that," she said, beaming with a look of love, but also something else. "Besides, when have I ever given you any inkling of doubt that I love you and you are the only one?" With that declaration she quickly broke off her loving gaze, almost reacting for a second to what she had said to me, and it seemed the look I was seeing was love, for sure, but something else too. A look of regret or guilt? Was that what I was seeing as she quickly turned away?

"So, nothing is going on, Diane? Come on, I know something is bouncing around in that beautiful head of yours. I can feel it, and you know I don't like secrets, so what gives?"

She turned back, looked at me and quietly said, "Jimmy, don't be mad at me, but yes, I have been attacking you and trying to get loads of your baby makers deep into my pussy because I went off birth control pills a few weeks ago and I decided we are going to have another baby. It's time, so how about we march up to the bedroom and get another round in before we have to pick up Beth and make dinner?" She tried to make her statement confident and light-hearted, but I could also see that she probably felt a little bit caught in an action that should have definitely been discussed before all the sex we had been having the last few weeks.

It wasn't that the idea of having another kid was foreign to me; we had talked about it in generic terms now and then, but it kind of pissed me off that I had no say in the actual decision to start trying. My first reaction, instead of being excited or thinking about all the sex I was going to get in the next few months, was being mad about being excluded in such a major family decision. "Shit, Diane, thanks a lot for conferring with me about one of the biggest decisions in our lives. I really appreciate your team approach," I said as sarcastically as I could.

Diane looked guilty as charged, and she immediately began to back pedal and apologize, saying, "Jimmy, I'm sorry. You're right; I should have talked to you but I was pretty sure that we both wanted this and I thought it would be so special and romantic to surprise you with an announcement out of the blue that I was pregnant and you were going to be a father again. I guess thinking about it now, I really see that that was wrong and selfish of me, and I'm sorry! It's just that you are the best father and husband that a family could have and I didn't want us to wait too long or Beth to be too much older than her little brother or sister. Please forgive me, babe. Are you so upset that you want me to go back on the pill?"

"God, Diane, don't put me into the position of being the bad guy now. I'm not saying I don't want a kid; I'm just saying that if we are truly going to be open, loving partners, we need to discuss anything that affects us both, especially something as big as a major financial and life-changing commitment as having another kid." With that, I abruptly turned around and went upstairs to our bedroom to get out of my work clothes and into my jeans.

Diane followed me up, muttering her apologies and asking for me to stop and talk about it. I sat down on our bed, and said, "Diane, this is going to necessitate a lot of changes in our life. For one thing, we only have two bedrooms, and with the price of child care, it makes sense that you continue to stay home and take care of the kids. But that also means we can't really afford to move into something bigger, at least not right now, and besides, I love the neighborhood we're in."

I had a decent job with a six-figure income as a supply-chain manager at a high-tech medical manufacturing firm, but Diane had left her job as a para-legal at a law firm three years before, right after her maternity leave when we had Beth. We weren't in the poor house, but we were also spending most of our after-tax dollars as it was, without another child expense to deal with.

"Jimmy, we talked about turning the attic into our master bedroom and ensuite, and how nice that could be. Maybe Jerry or some of your other buddies can help us, and we have plenty of time; we wouldn't have to do that for a year or more, anyway, and I thought you said that would be a great way to increase the equity in our house. Haven't you always said that you wanted to tackle a big home-improvement project like that?"

"Yeah, I know. And that's still the best approach, but I wasn't thinking about starting it tomorrow or anytime soon." I paused and thought about the work and the stress of handling my job plus that large of a project, and it gave me a pang of anxiety. She was right, though; we couldn't wait forever and we both wanted another kid, so with a sigh, I started to get my head around the idea of kicking that major project off.

"Tomorrow I was going to go golfing with Jerry after you and Beth left for your mom's house, but maybe I'll start on the attic clean-out and get rid of the junk up there. Since you've opened the switch gate and started the fertility train moving, I guess I'll hop on that train and give it my best shot, no pun intended."

"Jimmy, now I'm the one who is going to feel guilty if you are up in that attic tomorrow sweating buckets and missing your golf game while I'm playing games with Mom and Beth. Go ahead and go golfing, wait for me to start on the attic. I think most of that junk up there is mine and I need to go through my things anyway and decide what to do with them, so wait for me to give you the all clear before you go rummaging around up there like a bull in a China shop. She turned away with a hurried look that made me think she was worried about something else.

Diane came over to me and pulled me into a hug as she looked up into my eyes, and said, "I'm so sorry for the way I sprung this on you, Jimmy, and if you have doubts or want to wait, just tell me now. I really want to have another precious baby with you. You are the number one best partner and father I could have ever chosen.

"I'm sorry about not having this conversation a few weeks ago with you, but in my mind, I was so excited about surprising you with a pregnancy stick hidden under your napkin or something memorable like that."

"Diane, you still can do something like that. It isn't like you're going to instantly be pregnant, although I guess my 'little Jimmy baby-makers' are known to be quite adept in swimming the channel."

Diane snorted out a laugh, hit me on the shoulder, and said, "Well, Jimmy, you just keep coaching those little guys, and I'll make sure they have plenty of opportunities to take a dip. But, unfortunately round two for today is going to have to wait, cause Beth's time with the neighbors is up and I have to go get her."

*****

Surrounded by hot, dead, humid air, my ringing phone brought me out of my thoughts about last evening's big reveal from Diane, and I answered it after seeing that Jerry was calling. "Hey Jer, what's happening? Another day of single life without a care in the world?"

"Oh, yeah, James, you know it. In fact, I was going to grab a beer and watch some golf tournament on TV, but then I thought I should get off my ass and go play some golf instead, so how about you? Can you get away for a round? Didn't you say Diane and the rug rat were going to her mother's?"

"Yeah, they are, and Diane encouraged me last night and again this morning to get out and do something, but she also laid on me the fact that she went off birth control a few weeks ago and has been trying to get pregnant. She just about fucked me to death the last few days, so I was interrogating her on what the hell was going on and she admitted she was trying to get pregnant but just hadn't bothered to discuss with me whether the time was right."

"Wow, first of all, too much information about all the fucking you're doing when I'm sitting here alone and in the middle of a really long dry spell. But I can see how that surprise would be a total blow of anxiety to the head. Nothing like a dose of adult reality to set you straight. Then again, maybe a few beers are what you really need to start you on the journey of thousands of dollars and thousands of diapers. At least you'll be getting laid a lot. There is always an upside, right? What's another day of procrastination, though? Come on over and face reality another day."

"I'd like to, Jerry, but I'm already in the attic trying to plan out the construction project. I'm up here sweating my ass off and going through stuff. Maybe later today I can come over for happy hour and enjoy a few beers on your patio?"

"Yeah, man. Come on over; I guess I'm going to be hanging out, but I might be a few beers ahead of you by the time you get here. Just let me know if you aren't coming so I can swing out to the bar tonight and put my excellent pick-up lines to work."

"Yeah, well I'll make sure I show up to save you the embarrassment and rejection that that will no doubt produce. See you in a few, bud."

I looked back at the pile of boxes, old clothes and furniture and decided to start at the back of the pile and work my way forward. I spied a box at the back of the attic that was labelled, "Personal." It was Diane's writing and I chuckled, thinking if you want to stir up someone's curiosity, just label something personal. So naturally I started there.

I ripped open the box and the top layers were college books, college papers and class notebooks. Under those I came to a couple of shoeboxes, one of which had old Christmas and birthday cards that had been sent to Diane over the years. The other shoebox was tapped shut, so I ripped that one open and it had five letters, in blue pastel envelops, with Diane's name written on the front. The letters had never been mailed, as there was no address, stamps or postmark on them, just Diane's name on the front.

I picked up the one on top, opened it up and started to read what looked like a love letter to Diane. I felt a little guilty, thinking that old love letters to Diane were certainly not my business to read, so although I was tempted, I decided I would put them away, figuring this was some old college boyfriend and this wasn't any of my business. When I started to fold the letter up, I noticed a date written on the top right corner: 1/15/2016. That stopped me cold, as Diane and I had been married since June of 2012.

I quickly put the lid back on the box and sat back and cringed, wondering how it could be that my wife had what appeared to be love letters given to her during our marriage and important enough for her to keep squirreled away. I took the shoebox, put everything else back in the larger box, climbed down the attic stairs and moved downstairs to the dining room table, where I laid out the letters, looked at the dates and put them into sequential order. I took the first one out and as I read it, my world as I knew it fell apart.

January 15, 2016:

My dear Diane, I just want to thank you so much for letting me take you out dining and dancing last night. Over the last month I know we have developed a close relationship; certainly, closer than two co-workers typically are. I credit your fantastic personality and your beauty both inside and out as the reason we have come together. When we finished dinner and drinks, and I got to watch your poetic body in action as we danced at the club, I felt so very incredibly lucky. Then when a slow song played, and we melted into each other's arms, I was in heaven. I know you could feel how excited I was and I felt you push harder against my erection and pull me close. That's why I couldn't resist kissing you, and it was a kiss I'll never forget. I hope that you allow me to spend more time getting closer to you, and I have to be honest and tell you that I want you so badly I can't stop thinking about you in my arms.

Jake

I Read it again, and thought back to January of 2016, three years and six months before. I remembered how we had gotten into a troubling aloofness in our marriage, with Diane seeming distant and pulling back from our relationship. I remembered we had only been married for four years, and I was in fear that the magic was already gone from our marriage, but I was determined to hang in there and try and do everything I could to make Diane happy.

With a tear in my eye, I now thought I understood what had started that rough patch. I felt depressed and almost had an out-of-body experience, watching my sulking hulk sitting at the dining room table, trying to comprehend what might be the end of my marriage. I didn't want to move on to the next letter as I sat in shock and despair, but a great anger took over my mind and I knew that now with the secret out, I had to know the truth and understand how badly I might have been betrayed.

January 25th, 2016:

Diane, last night was a dream come true. When I kissed you after dinner, and you hugged and kissed me back, I knew that we were meant to be together. Thank you so very much for coming up to my room with me for a nightcap; and for the magically erotic gift you gave me. When I went down on you and tasted your sweet nectar, I knew that I was truly in heaven. When you took me in your mouth, and later allowed me to cum in that sweet pussy of yours, I knew we had to be together. I am available for you, anywhere, anytime, and know that I will give and take as much as you will possibly let me. I know when you left you felt guilty about your husband, but I hope you feel as I do; that we are true soulmates and can't let guilt or societal norms stop us from sharing our love. We are meant to be together, my darling.

Jake