Julia

I had worked for the company for 25 years. I had worked my way up the ladder and had an easy desk job. The problem was, I felt I was too young to sit around all day bullshitting with other vice presidents while accomplishing little or nothing. I had decided to take my retirement and start a landscaping business. Middle age crazy? Perhaps.

Julia, my wife for the past 23 years had been supportive. She kept telling me that she wanted me to do whatever it would take to be happy. I stunned everyone when I submitted my retirement papers. I was just two weeks from my 45th birthday and retiring!

The usual rumors about winning the lottery or having a rich relative die circulated. Why would a guy walk away from a sweetheart job like I had? Gradually, everyone accepted my reason. I wanted to do something different before I was too old to do it. It was that simple.

Julia and I had both worked hard to have a nice home, raise our two kids, and prepare for their college expenses. We had made a few good real estate investments. We weren't wealthy, but we had enough that I felt I could start my own business and pay the bills until I was old enough to start collecting my pension from work. After that, we should be shitting in high clover!

Julia was 42 and still turned heads. She had gained only a few pounds over the years, and those pounds only added to her allure. She was smart and capable as well as a great mother and wife. I had lucked out when I found her!

Some of my friends at work had decided to throw a little going-away party for me at a local hotel. My daughter, Cindy, just out of college and working her first teaching job brought her new beau, Jack. Our son, Steve, was less than a year from graduating with a degree in chemistry. He attended with one of the several young ladies he dated.

Julia looked great in a simple little red dress that showed a fair amount of cleavage. I asked myself several times that evening why I had never realized just how nice her tits really were!

It was a great time. I received a bunch of gag gifts, like a shovel and a bag of manure from my friends. When I unwrapped them roars of laughter erupted from the group. The drinks were flowing and the fun was contagious. It was a great party.

I had a slight lull in hand shaking and back patting, so I decided to step outside to catch some fresh air. It seemed like everyone there wanted to have a drink with me and I didn't want to pass out at my own party. Fresh air and a little time away from everyone would do me good, or so I thought.

It was a warm, moonlit evening. I strolled around the grounds, just trying to relax and shake the effects of the numerous beers I had consumed. I had given the car keys to my son, Steve, earlier in the evening, just to avoid any temptation of driving. As I approached the part of the hotel apparently used for storage, I heard voices drifting softly through a window screen.

"God, you have nice tits! I've wanted to squeeze them for years. What a handful they are!"

I recognized the voice of Ted Darcy, a coworker with whom I had worked alongside for at least fifteen years. He was married, and his wife was at the party, but it certainly didn't sound like he was talking to his wife!

"Your pussy is as hot and tight as I thought it would be!" he whispered over the moaning of his partner. "I can't last much longer!"

"Don't cum in me!" was his partner's urgent response.

Fear gripped my gut as I stepped to the window and looked in. Ted was fucking Julia! He had her top down and her dress up over her ass. She was bent over a stack of folding chairs and he was slamming her for all he was worth.

"Are you kidding?" laughed Ted. "I haven't waited this long to waste this load! Ahhgg!"

I knew he was unloading in the body of my wife of 23 years. I felt sick. I stumbled away about twenty feet and lost everything I had eaten and whatever drink wasn't already in my bloodstream. I must have wretched for five minutes.

That was how Cindy and Jack found me.

"Dad! Are you okay?" she asked with genuine concern. "You'd better not have any more beer, Dad. You look like a ghost! We've been looking for you. I just saw Mom in the bathroom and she said she hadn't seen you for some time. How long have you been sick?"

"Just a few minutes," I managed to croak. Julia hadn't seen me, but I sure as hell saw her.

I felt the need to do or say something, but nothing came to mind. My brain was numb, and it wasn't the beer that caused it. I was in shock, pure and simple. There was no sense returning to the party. If I did, I'd just kill a person or two, and that sort of behavior tends to really put a damper on any festivities.

"Cindy, I want you and Jack to take me home, right now!" I insisted.

"Sure, Dad. I'll go get Mom and we'll take you home right away," replied Cindy.

"Cindy! I want you and Jack to walk me to your car right now and take me home. Will you do that for me, or not?" I demanded.

Cindy looked at me for several seconds and nodded.

"Okay, Dad! I don't know what's wrong, but I think home is the best place for you now. Jack, let's get my Dad home."

They escorted me to their car and we were on the road in a matter of minutes. I slumped in the back seat, trying to make sense of my life, but failing miserably. Then I saw Cindy pull her cell phone out.

"Cindy, give me your cell, please!" I insisted more than asked.

Twenty plus years of obeying my orders resulted in Cindy handing me her cell. I slid it into my pocket.

"Dad, what are you doing?" she wondered. "I was going to call Mom and let her know that we were taking you home, that you were ill!"

"That's about what I thought, Cindy. I'll give you the phone back some other time."

"Did you have a fight with Mom? Now you're running out and leaving her at your party, alone? I can promise you that she'll be even more angry when she finds out you left her high and dry," Cindy reasoned. "Give me the phone, Dad, and let me call her. She'll understand that you had too much to drink. You even got sick. She won't be mad, but she'll be furious if we don't tell her!"

"Oh well," was my response. I had to bite my tongue before I blurted out that Julia wasn't dry, not with Ted's deposit simmering in her snatch. One thing I did not want to do was lose the love of my kids. Snide, cruel remarks about their mother would only drive them from me.

It took twenty minutes to get home. I quickly did the math as I climbed out of the car. I stepped to the front window and spoke to Cindy and Jack.

"Thanks for the ride, kids. Now, I want you to go back to the party. You can say anything you want, or as little as you want, about my absence. You can tell your mother, or not. I don't care right now."

"Dad! What is wrong? You're scaring me, now! We should come in with you and make sure you're all right. Jack can go back and tell Mom where you are and I'll stay here with you. How about that?" asked Cindy.

"Sorry, Cindy. I'll be fine. I feel better already. I really appreciate your concern, but I want you to go back and leave me here. I'm a big boy and can take care of myself," I managed to laugh. "Now get going!"

Cindy still looked worried as Jack pulled onto the highway and drove away. I turned and headed for the house. I calculated I had about half an hour, to be on the safe side. As soon as I got inside, I called for a taxi to come in 25 minutes. Then I went up to our bedroom and grabbed a suitcase. It was hard to think about what clothes I needed, but as I looked around, my mind settled down.

I wouldn't need any suits or ties! I grabbed jeans, tee shirts, underwear, work shirts and socks. I took my ring off and put it on the pillow on Julia's side of the bed. I looked around the bedroom for what may have been the last time, and went downstairs. The cab was just pulling in. I tossed my bag in the seat and climbed in. I had the cab driver take me to a small motel near a car dealership. I was checked into my new 'home' within an hour and a half of when I saw Julia betraying me.

I wanted to get really drunk but decided I had all the stomach problems I could handle for one night. I turned on the TV and lay in bed. Then the tears finally came. I cried for half an hour and when I finally stopped, I felt better. My cell phone had been ringing every couple minutes, but I ignored it. Then Cindy's started ringing. Then both phones were ringing. Somehow, that gave me some small feeling of satisfaction. At least Julia knew I was upset!

The next morning, I was at the car dealership when it opened. I looked over a few pick-ups and bought one. I drove out half an hour later with nothing but a suitcase full of blues. I went to the bank and removed half of our savings. I canceled any credit cards that had my name. I was thinking how lucky I was that banks and other businesses were open on Saturday mornings. I realized I couldn't contact my former employer and see how I could change my retirement package, but I would work on that first thing Monday morning.

I knew there were probably a hundred other things I should do, but I was too drained to spend time trying to think. My car was in my name and I'd sell that when I had the chance. I'd watch the house and when Julia left for work, I would get my car from the garage and sell it. Then I would go back and pack as much of my shit and tools into my truck as I could and ... then what?

I decided that I still had to try to follow my plan, my dream really, even if it was alone. I had noticed a sale sign on a lot a little out of town. It was a couple acres and on a fairly well traveled highway. The sign had been there for over a year.

I stopped at the listing realtor's office and inquired about the lot. He told me the price and why it was worth every penny. I listened for a few minutes and dug out my new checks. I offered half the asking price and he almost shit his pants. He started telling me why it wouldn't work.

"I want you to write this fucking offer up right now!" I insisted. "Here's a check for ten percent. This offer is cash and I can close inside thirty days. I'll be in Monday afternoon for the owner's response."

I had everything signed and was out of there in twenty minutes, once we cut the bullshit and got down to brass tacks.

I decided to wait to see if I would own the property before I found someplace more permanent to live. I wanted to be within an easy drive of my new career. I stopped at a little luncheonette I had never eaten at before and had my first meal since barfing at the hotel. I was surprised that I was able to eat. I guess time was beginning to heal my wounds.

I almost shit my pants when I looked up from my fries and saw Cindy sitting down across from me! How could she have found me?

"I see you're feeling a little better, Dad. The rest of us have been through hell, but you're doing great!" she sniped. I realized that she had learned that from a master.

"Care for a fry?" I asked. I was too surprised to think of anything meaningful.

"I don't know what you think you're doing, or what you think Mom or us kids did to deserve this, but you're a real shit!" she declared.

I made no response. It seemed like a reasonable conclusion for her to reach. I had no intention of defending my position. Right, or wrong, I was starting a new life and apologizing wasn't part of the plan.

"Mom cried all night! I bet she's still crying. We tried to get her to tell us what happened, but she says she doesn't know. She said the last time she saw you everything was fine. What happened, Dad? Who are you mad at, as if I have to ask? You wouldn't leave the house if it was Steve or me."

"Well, it'll just have to be a mystery then, Cindy. How did you find me here?" I asked.

"Do you think you're some kind of secret agent, Dad? I called the cab company. They told me where they took you last night. I drove over there and saw the dealership, so I asked if my father had been in. When I found out what you were driving, I rode around looking for your truck. Nice wheels, Dad!"

"Thanks, Cindy. I needed something for my new career. I can't haul dirt and fertilizer in a car, can I? I'm trying to buy a lot to use as a base of operation for a landscaping business," I admitted.

"You're amazing, you know that! I called you a shit and you never flinched. You don't care how much we suffer, do you?" demanded Cindy.

"I care very much for you and you have no doubts about that, Cindy. You can act all haughty, but you know I would lay down my life for you. You've known it since you were little and first wound me around your finger," I retorted. "The 'you don't love me' trick won't work, Sweetheart."

"What do I tell Mom? At least tell me something I can take back to her, Dad. She has the right to know what is happening!" pleaded Cindy.

"You are right to feel that way, and to care about your mother. I'm proud of you, Cindy. You are showing real character," I replied carefully.

"I got it from you, Dad! That's why I am so confused here. It's so unlike you to run and hide from a problem, whatever it is," she almost cried.

"Cindy, you have to believe what you just told me. I haven't suddenly changed, or lost my character. I'm simply living my life. You can call me and chat anytime you want. Here's your cell phone," I told my daughter as I reached into my pocket and produced her phone.

"Thanks!" Cindy replied with no small amount of sarcasm. "There must be twenty messages on it, most of them from me! If I call you, will you answer from now on?"

"Yes, I'll take a call from you any time, any place, Cindy," I smiled.

"Mom said you took a suitcase and some clothes. Do you need anymore? I can bring some to wherever you're staying."

"No, I can pick some up some time, so don't worry about me, but thanks, Cindy. You know I love you as much as a father ever has loved a daughter," I replied as I broke into a big grin as I looked at my little girl.

"I know you do, Dad. I guess you aren't feeling so much love for Mom, though. I'll get it out of her. Now that I know where the problem is, I'm going to get to the bottom of this thing. Just don't do anything dumb," cautioned Cindy. "I'll be calling you."

With that, Cindy got to her feet, gave me a big kiss on the cheek and walked out the door. I marveled at how beautiful, mature, and smart my little girl had become.

I laid low at a different motel on Sunday. I watched the Masters on TV and wondered why I couldn't hit a ball straight, even for a hundred yards. Monday saw me back at the realtors.

To the consternation of the agent, my offer was accepted and I was going to be the owner of a prime chunk of real estate! I knew that when a seller asks too much money and the property sits very long; they often sell for less than market value in desperation. This was actual proof of that theory.

I drove by my former residence and saw no activity. I parked down the street and walked back. I looked into the garage and saw Julia's car was gone. I went back to my truck and backed it up to the garage. I went inside and opened the door and started gathering my tools. I decided to take the stuff that I had no title, or bill of sale, since Julia could give it away to her lover, or some other fucker. The car was in my name and she couldn't sell that.

I heard something and I looked up. Cindy was removing my keys from the truck. She wiggled them at me and then stuck them in her pocket.

"I won't return these to you until you go inside and talk to Mom! You don't have to stay, but at least go talk to her, Dad. Even if you don't think she deserves that consideration, do it for me. I'll never ask another thing again, but if you don't do this one thing, then I'll never talk to you again. You won't be invited to my wedding, if I ever have one, and you won't get to see any kids my possible betrothal could create," she avowed.

I considered Cindy's threat for a few moments. Would she stick to that promise? It seemed unlikely, but she knew I couldn't do anything to risk losing her. I sighed and turned toward the house.

Julia was sitting at the kitchen table. I went to the refrigerator and pulled out a brew and sat across form her. I had trouble keeping the tears back as I looked at Julia. All I could see was Ted fucking her. The more I tried to push the vision from my mind, the more real it became.

"Gary, I want to know what is going on? You have treated me like shit and I deserve an explanation if you expect this marriage to continue!" Julia stated with surprising control.

I thought I was over the crying, but I wasn't. I just started sobbing like a small child. I couldn't stop, although I tried. The last thing I wanted Julia to see was how hurt I was. I wanted to present a strong, indifferent attitude. I wanted her to miss me, to feel as much pain as I felt. I wanted her to see that I could carry on quite nicely without her, that I didn't need some slut in my life. I wanted all that, but instead I just cried.

"Mom! What did you say to Dad?" demanded Cindy. "I've never seen him like this! Maybe it was a bad idea to have you wait for him to come for his stuff. What have you done to him, Mom?"

Cindy was hugging me and crying, too. She just held me and cried with me. It was at least five minutes before I was able to speak. I dried my eyes and looked around. Cindy was looking at me with moist eyes, but her tears had stopped as well. We both lifted our eyes to Julia.

It was difficult to read her face. It was a combination of horror and sadness. She swallowed a couple times and then she began to talk.

"Gary, I'm so sorry! It was a stupid mistake. I had too much to drink and he was very persuasive. I was weak. I was flattered. I was surprised. He doesn't mean a thing to me. I love you, Gary, only you!"

"What the fuck!" exclaimed Cindy.

I had never used that word around her and I certainly never heard her use it before!

"You're fucking some guy behind Dad's back? Like some slut? Like a fucking whore? That's what this is about, isn't it, Mom?" screamed Cindy. "My mother is just a piece of goddamn trash! Well, Dad, I'll help you pack, but if I were you, I'd throw her whoring ass out and keep the house!"

As Cindy condemned her mother, Julia's face reflected all the pain I could ever imagine. Betraying your spouse is also betraying your children. Julia was becoming painfully aware of that fact.

"It was only once!" Julia wailed. "I regretted it as soon as it happened. I wanted to die. I was sick, physically sick after it happened. I had just thrown up in the bathroom when you asked me where your dad was! Somehow I knew he'd find out. I was certain. When he left his own party without me, my fears were confirmed. He already knew! When you came back to the party and told me how oddly he behaved, I knew he found out."

"I tried to get home as fast as I could to explain. Not explain... but to beg forgiveness! I found the house empty, some clothes and a suitcase gone, and his wedding ring on my pillow! I spent the night thinking about killing myself, Cindy!" cried Julia. "How do you fix something so terrible, so very wrong? How do I get everyone, anyone, that I love to love me again? I can't!"

Cindy and I just stared at Julia as she poured out her guts. I didn't know what I felt or what to even say.

"I thought I might be able to bluster my way through the whole thing when Gary came into the kitchen. I tried an O. J. defense. I was going to admit nothing and make Gary show any proof he had. I believed he couldn't have any, so that would have to mean I was innocent! Then when he broke down and cried so hard and so long, my heart was crushed. I could see he had all the proof he needed. He knew. Somehow he knew and I'm so sorry!"

"Why are you sorry? Because we know what a slut you really are? You get fucked at a party in Dad's honor! Is that the only time, or is it the only time you're willing to admit? Is Dad even my father? Is Steve his son? How can we be sure of anything now, goddamn it!" yelled Cindy. "How long have you been spreading your legs for every worthless fucker that comes along? How many years?"