Iras Bride

Ira walked out of the doctor's office slower and a lot older than when he had gone in. He looked at the steps leading down into the subway.

Not today. Today he did not have it in him to go down into the tube.

It's nice out; I'll just walk. A mile isn't that far. He wasn't ready to go home just yet. He needed to think about what he had been told a half hour ago.

After four blocks, with sweat pouring off his brow, Ira knew this had been a bad idea. For over forty-five years he had thought nothing of the half-mile walk from his brownstone to his tailor shop. But that was a long time ago, and he had been much younger back then. He sat on a bench and struggled to catch his breath. For the first time in years Ira hailed a cab.

Ruth knew as soon as Ira walked through the door that the doctor's news had not been good. His shoulders sagged a bit more, and the crooked smile and gleam in his eyes were missing. Ira never complained, but after sixty-two years together Ruth knew her husband. She could see his pain reflected in his eyes.

"Well?" she asked impatiently.

"He said I have the heart of a seventy-year-old."

"How about the rest of you?"

Ira thought back to the doctor's words.

"Mr. Levinson, the cancer has spread throughout your body. I am sorry. There is nothing we can do for you."

"How long do I have?"

"I'm afraid, no more than a month at best. I will prescribe a strong pain medication, but you will want to get in contact with Hospice soon."

"The doctor gave me some pills that he said will take care of whatever ails me." He could not meet Ruth's eyes.

"Oy Gevalt! If he has a pill that will cure what ails an eighty-six-year-old man, I just might take a few of them myself," she said, forcing out a laugh. For the first time, since they had gotten married, Ira didn't laugh at one of her jokes.

"Come. Come into the kitchen. I have lunch on the table—and I don't want to hear you're not hungry. You are too skinny and your clothes are starting to hang on you."

They ate in silence. Ruth knew her husband was keeping something from her, but Ira was a proud man and would tell her when he was ready, so she did not push.

Ira spent that afternoon at his desk. He first looked at their investments and then took out all the paperwork Ruth would need when the time came, including the key to their safety deposit box. They owned their home and the only bills they had were the monthly utilities. Financially, Ruth would be fine.

"I was thinking, my love. Why don't we invite the children over to dinner on Sunday? We have not seen them in a while and I miss our grandchildren."

"I will call and see if they're available and instead of cooking, though, why don't I order in from the deli? This way we won't have a big mess to clean up and we will probably have enough leftovers for a few days."

On Saturday Ira went to the Synagogue for the first time in years. He said that he wanted to see a few friends he had lost track of over the years. He came back looking a little tired, but smiling.

The sparkle in Ira's eye returned Sunday. Everyone laughed, ate, and tried to keep the children from destroying their grandparents' house. There were plenty of hugs and kisses to go around. Ruth watched her husband. It looked like he was trying to hold onto every last moment with them. By Monday the gleam in his eye was gone again.

As the days went by, Ira became more lethargic and depended more and more on his magic pills. When he started to sleep past his normal wake-up time, Ruth knew in her heart what Ira had been keeping from her.

One night as they lay next to each other in the dark, she asked the question she really did not want the answer to but needed to hear.

"My husband, how much time do we have left with each other?"

He was quiet for a moment. "Not much, my bride."

Ira had called her his bride since the day they had exchanged their vows. Even though Ruth had told him she was too old to be anyone's bride, he would say, "You will be my bride, until my last breath."

With tears in his eyes, Ira told his wife. "I love you so much but I'm afraid, I've never been without you."

"My husband, do not be afraid. I will always be right here with you. Now go to sleep. You need your rest."

As Ira slept, Ruth relived their last sixty-two years. They were not always easy, but she had never once doubted Ira's love for her. What would she do without him? She never thought she would have to worry about that. Until now.

Ruth no longer woke Ira when he slept. When he was asleep, he was without pain. He no longer had an appetite, so Ruth ate only when he slept.

The angel from Hospice came. The morphine she administered dulled any remaining pain Ira had. His last days were spent saying goodbye to his children and the few friends he had not out-lived. Ruth never left his side.

One night Ruth awoke when she felt Ira's feeble hand grasp hers.

"Ruth, I loved you even before I knew what love was. Remember when I first told you that you were going to be my wife?"

"Ira, I was twelve. What did a twelve-year-old girl know of love?"

"But my father talked to your father and an agreement was struck."

"Without my knowledge!"

"Are you sorry?"

"No, not in the least. You have given me a life filled with love. What more could I have asked for?"

"When I die I don't want you to be alone. If you wish to remarry you have my blessing."

Surprised, she looked at him and then saw the crooked smile and long lost gleam in his eye.

"Your bride will never be another's bride. Now go to sleep, you old fool."

Ira never woke up. He died in the comfort of his home with the one person that had meant everything to him.

Ruth grieved his loss but cherished the joy he'd given her.

*****

Ruth didn't start over in the true sense of the word. She more so carried on as a volunteer Angel of Hospice. She helped others in their time of need giving them the courage to move on like they had given to her. She told her children it was her new calling in life.

When her time came, she was not afraid. She would be reunited with the love of her life. Ira would have his bride back in his arms again.