This started as an exercise in writing a first-time story in LW's section. I still encourage anyone to post their own conclusion. Here's mine. Straight up, there are some cuckold themes. You've been notified here.
*****
Carrie looked down, carefully folded Dan's note, and returned it to her robe's pocket. It was time to make a fresh pot a coffee. Walking to the counter where the coffee pot sat, Carrie flipped to auto-pilot. Things had to be done, but she wouldn't be there.
And so, it was. All day long Carrie performed her task based on a schedule she had created herself. Her regular routine. To perfection. Except she wasn't smiling about it. She wasn't frowning about it either. She wasn't even there.
From the moment she finished reading the note left by Dan, she felt his presence in the back of her mind. That presence was about the size of a tangerine and was pressing very hard against that place that sounds out the alarm warning, "How am I going to fix this?" Throughout the day uninvited images of family members would float in and out while audio thoughts of remorse looped over and over in her mind like a song she couldn't get out of her head.
"Dan...children... house...mom... dad... Dan... sorry... children... house... stay calm... children, children, got to fix this, ...shit! Shit! SHIT!... Calm down... you can do this...forgive me... fix this, got to fix this... think... Dan... sorry,...so sorry... help me...children...Danny... children...got to fix this...somehow...got to fix this. Dan...please...help me...fix this."
--
He had played a game of chicken and lost. The problem was the other player didn't even know they were playing a game. Carrie suggested something and Dan went along. Not for the same reasons. For Carrie, it was an adventure. For Dan, it was a test.
As far as Dan was concerned, it began the night Carrie poured wine out and started tripping on her black cock fantasy. That look on her face. What to do? Why was she even suggesting this? At that instant, a moment of clarity came as a prophetic call only he could hear, "Goddamn baby, you are one crazy bitch."
At that moment Dan made the harshest decision he'd ever made in his life. If she followed through, he would cut bait. He would watch and wait. Carrie was so crazy about this, Dan had to know for sure. Up until the last moment, Dan was hoping against all hope, that Carrie would come to her senses. She had to do this herself. Because once either spouse approaches the other with the idea of another partner, the dynamics of that relationship changes forever. Tell them "no", then they'll hide it. He gave Carrie a couple of days to back out, but she didn't. Dan cut bait when she walked in that hotel room that night. Goodbye stranger, it's been nice.
Dan's thoughts were with his children. Carrie did what she did. Screw her. But what in the fuck was he going to do? Dan had grown quite attached to his children. They were perfect and he loved them. This whole getting married, buying a house, having few children was supposed to be Dan's AND Carries dream. Now, all Dan saw was a big pile of stinking shit his life had become.
"I love the kids...but...what a waste. What have I done with my life? I thought we were good together. What really pisses me off? I never saw this coming. Carrie? Carrie and I now have just become another statistic that can be added to the number of marriages that end in divorce.
What I'm pissed at is myself. There must have been some signs prior to this for us to fall so far down and so fast, but I can't for the life of me figure where that point started.
I laid in bed for hours, fingers locked together behind my head, just staring at the ceiling reviewing the past year of events. I kept looking for a hint, a clue, anything that would reveal how unsatisfied Carrie was with me. We had sex 2 or 3 times a week. Not enough? She never said so. I would have tried harder. The worst part is I love her so much. Not that I ever want to ever touch her again. But I do really love the shit out that bitch. I love her so much I could kill her. I have so much anger inside, I feel I am about to go postal when I am around her.
Paulo Coelho, wrote, "Accept what life offers and drink from every cup."
I call bullshit on that. I get it, Carrie has a higher sex drive than I can satisfy. Not my problem anymore, but man, it hurts to know that. Not her problem anymore either because she knows where to find what she wants, but what about our children? What am I going to do about them?
And our parents? Jesus Christ. My folks? Her folks? Our brothers, sisters, their spouses, our nieces, and nephews? Our family get-togethers? And Thanksgiving and Christmas around the corner too. Maybe it would be better if I just disappeared. But the children...
And the house? 5 years left on the mortgage. All the hard work and sweat l put into that place for nothing. What a waste. I did it all for us. I wanted Carrie to be happy with our home. I loved working on that place. When I finished building the patio in the back-yard Carrie was so thrilled. That's all the motivation I needed for any project around the house. She seemed so genuinely pleased with everything I did. Watching her expressions and listening as she would walk around praising my hard work was music to my ears. I guess it wasn't enough. Did I ever really know her?
But now? I don't know what to think, but I know how I 'feel'. I look at our home and 'feel' nothing but regret for ever buying it. I 'feel' like pouring a can of gasoline all over the place, lighting it on fire, and watching it burn down. Like my marriage. Maybe the house wasn't enough for Carrie? I don't know, she never said anything about it. Her car? I don't know. Clothes? Money? Attention? Did I give her enough? I truly believed everything was fine. Obviously, I was so wrong. Still, the children.
And I can't afford this motel room for long. I don't have that kind of money. I'm spending money from our savings account. I can't go over to mom and dad's and say, "Can I stay here a bit. Carrie and I are splitting up because she needs a big black cock and my smaller, white one that doesn't come in any other colors isn't doing it for her anymore."
I think I'm losing my mind here. I can't think straight at all. Whatever I did, it wasn't enough. Somewhere along the line, I failed to see her unhappiness with me. I hope Carrie keeps her mouth shut. If this comes out, everyone will conclude I wasn't doing it for her, I was lacking, and she went elsewhere.
I guess that's part of it. Carrie found me lacking. What can I do about that? Nothing. I'm not a wimp, but I'm not stupid either. You are either attracted to your partner that way or not. The end. I understand that, and that's how she feels about me. I have watched that video a hundred times and know it's true. She was so much happier without me involved. I look at myself in the mirror and feel like blowing my brains out. Or hers. That's why I can't be around her now. I want to hate her, but I can't. I want to kill her, but that's illegal. Why did I ever marry her? Fuck me.
Carrie always wanted to be a stay at home mom, and that was never an issue. I gave it everything I had to make a nice home for her. I wanted Carrie to be happy staying at home with the children. I love those kids so much, but I "feel" so much regret having them with Carrie.
I was a dope. She found an idiot like me, married him, got a house, a car, and sperm samples for children. That is some bullshit. Maybe all women think that way. I wonder how many other men have been fucked over like this throughout time? Instead of a life I dreamed, I am now just another statistic.
These thoughts in my head are pissing me off. I have to quit whining like a little bitch and man up. I've got to get a plan. I need something to change the dynamics of this crap. Carrie has got some serious payback coming. She believes she understands, but she's clueless how this feels. I need my pound of flesh. That little witch needs a lesson and know that it's coming from me."
It was that moment, it came to him. It was simple really. Dan worked through the details in his mind and later in the afternoon, he called Carrie, "Hi, how are you doing Carrie?"
"Dan, please come home and stay. Tell me how to fix this. Whatever you want. Help me, Danny. Please. Do it for the children. They need you around. I need you. We all need you, Danny. Tell me what to do."