Damn this carpet cleaner! It was 10:30 on a Friday morning and I was about to lose it for the second time this morning. I had just spent an hour cleaning the kitchen, including the oven and was now tackling the rugs in the den when I realized the stupid thing wasn't sucking up the dirt.
Disgusted, I threw it aside, making a half hearted mental note to ask Liam to have a look and then collapsed on the couch. I immediately got up again to pour myself a vodka. I'm self medicating. I was never meant to be a housewife.
It was because of a series of fortunate (for Liam and us) events that he got the better job and I got stuck with the house and kids. The whole lot of them were slowly driving me mad when I wasn't driving them around.
I drank my vodka and sighed. Yesterday I had gone clothes shopping for the kids. Liam still doesn't know but I 'lost' $200. This happens when you pay cash for things you don't want your husband to find out about. Like pregnancy tests after he's had a vasectomy and vibrators because he drinks so much booze, he can't get it up.
I bought the vibrator, not the pregnancy test, in case you were wondering. And I'm not so far behind on the drinking stakes if I'm knocking it back at 10 in the morning. In Liam's defence, because he's a director (of the company) he has to drink a lot because he has to entertain investors. A lot. The deal was he'd leave me and the kids out of it and be home at least three times a week for family time. I was happy with that deal, still am. I do not like ass licking potential investors, and there are drugs at those parties. I'm just not into drugs, not that alcohol is any better if it's an addiction.
The buzzer must have rung before, but I was drowning in misery, so I didn't hear it, whoever it was had put their finger on it and kept it there.
I flipped back to anger and stalked to the front door, flinging it open, ready to come down on whoever was selling whatever with the wrath of a housewife being disturbed.
"What!?" I screamed at the beast. The beast removed his finger from the buzzer as if it had just shocked him and actually took a step back. The beast was Neil, Liam's friend.
"Don't shoot me, I surrender." He replied in a mocking tone of voice that cut no ice with me. I didn't even bother to put on my look-you-made-a-joke half-smile.
"What do you want Neil?"
"Please, enough with the flirting, I know you don't like me."
"And I never will. Liam is at the office. Goodbye." And fuck off. I started to close the door. He put his foot in the way.
"We need to talk."
"No, we don't, I have nothing to say to you. Get your foot out of my door."
"Fuck you." He replied and pushed the door open.
In that moment, I became terrified of him and whatever he wanted. I turned and ran into the kitchen, my phone was on the counter. I heard the front door slam closed behind me and Neil's footsteps following me into the kitchen. As I snatched up my phone, two arms of iron closed around me from behind and I could hear him breathing in my neck. One arm pinned me against him and the other was reaching for the phone in my hand.
"Give it." He demanded. I gave him a backwards kick in the shin, inwardly cursing myself for not wearing 6 inch spiked heels while housecleaning. He barely grunted and his hand wrapped tighter around mine, trying to pull the phone from my grasp. I turned my head towards the side and sunk my teeth into his arm.
He howled in pain and let go of me simultaneously. He still had the other hand on me and my phone, but I twisted around and raised my knee between his legs, driving up in a lunge learned in Pilates class. He managed to twist away quickly enough to save his balls and my lunge landed ineffectively on a muscled thigh.
I relaxed my grip on my phone and pulled my arm back. We stood facing each other, like two prize fighters, slightly out of breath after our ten second fight. Okay, I was slightly out of breath.
"Have you been drinking?"
I kicked his shin. Not as hard as I wanted to. Then I turned and ran for the front door. Neil came after me and grabbed me from behind again, this time he threw me over his shoulder like a small sack of potatoes and then unceremoniously dumped me on me couch.
He picked up the glass of vodka, sniffed it and then scowled at me. I was looking for a way past him.
"I'm not going to hurt you, you don't have to look at me as if I'm some kind of..." Yes, Neil, you finish that sentence.
"Get out of my house, I will go to the cops."
"Just calm down, Bianca." He shouldn't have said that.
"Get out!" I screamed at full volume, hoping someone was nearby, innocently walking past or lurking in the bushes, I didn't care, as long as they heard me scream and did something about it.
"Bianca!" The asshole shouted at me in a no-nonsense voice he must have used on his children.
I opened my mouth to scream again and like a bolt of lightning he moved from the other side of the couch to half fall on me, crushing me and putting a hand over my mouth. I screamed into his hand and then I tried to bite him. He pushed me onto my back and lay over me, pinning my arms with his.
"I need to talk to you about Lacie! My wife! Shut up dammit!"
"Stop shouting at me!" I shouted back at him. He released my arms and got off of me. He sat next to me staring straight ahead as I sat up and pushed my boobs back into my bra and otherwise righted myself. I looked towards the door and he shot up and stood between me and the door. I was confused, what about Lacie was so bad that he was treating me like a prisoner trying to escape?
"What about her?"
"She come here this week to visit?"
"What are you, her keeper?"
"Just tell me Bianca dammit, I don't have time for your fucking games!"
Oh God, she's gone, she's missing. My eyes grew wide with fright and wet with tears. I began to sob.
"Have you called the police? When did you see her last? She didn't say anything to me about leaving you." The words fell out of my mouth before I could stop them.
Neil collapsed onto the other couch like someone who's wind had been knocked out.
"She left me?" He looked like a dog that had been kicked by its master, it was painful to watch.
"You mean she's not missing, like kidnapped missing?" I stopped crying, or tried to, something was getting lost in translation here.
"You knew." He accused me.
"I did not, I swear. We all talk about leaving, but nobody actually leaves. Except for Tracy and we all knew that was coming."
I folded my arms and looked at him sternly, none of us had appreciated the I'm-free party the men all threw for Richard when Tracy left him, and she had good reason.
"You're hiding something." Again with an accusatory tone of voice, I was getting tired of that, real fast.
"Contrary to your jackass belief, I am not. I didn't know Lacie was planning on leaving you, although if I was her, I would have."
Oh, the sweet taste of that hitting its mark, he had that hurt, hunted look in his eyes again.
"Can I look on your phone?"
"Do you think she stopped packing to text me? Go ahead, make my day."
He didn't answer, he got up and walked to the kitchen. He stood in the doorway looking through my phone. He must have stood there for a full ten minutes invading my privacy. Then he gently placed the phone back on the counter and without looking back or at least apologizing, walked back out of the front door.
The first thing I did when my legs remembered how to work was to call Lacie. She didn't pick up. I called her a couple of times over the weekend, but I had no luck. On Sunday a computer told me the service had been disconnected. On Sunday evening I stewed myself into a righteous rage as I waited for Liam to get home from his golf day.
He was more than tipsy as usual.
"Neil barged in here Friday morning scaring my wits out of me, thundering about Lacie leaving him." I had waited until he tried to have sex, he couldn't get it up, as usual, so I just killed what was left of any chance his cock had to rise. He sighed and rolled off of me onto his back.
"I know."
"You knew, and you didn't say anything?"
"For heaven's sake Bianca, he just wanted to know about his wife. You women discuss these things."
Jackass.
"Well, we 'women' did not discuss this. He could have raped me, you know."
"Neil wouldn't hurt a fly." Liam mumbled already falling asleep. I couldn't fight even if I wanted to, and I did want to, but trying to fight a sleeping drunk man is like trying to keep a hat on during a tornado.
I noticed that our relationship was on a downward slope and spent the next six months trying to get it back on track. So much so that when Neil asked me to please attend the year-end function for the bigwigs, I acquiesced without complaint.
I happily spent a large amount of money on a designer dress and between the beauty salon and the food store, I 'lost' another $200 on some lovely vibrating panties. They came with a phone app. I could sit through their boring function listening to drunk men boast about profits with a real smile on my face. A girl has to be prepared.
The function was on a Friday night and as soon as we were seated, Neil got up again and went to slap some shoulders over at the bar area with the other men. Our table seated eight and there were already two other women sitting and talking to each other. I knew neither of them so I got my phone out of my clutch bag and opened my secret app.
A soft vibration started against my pussy. This was the best invention since the telephone. I crossed my legs and sat back, I rocked my ankles from side to side and that was enough to get the vibrator purring against my clit. I tried to look bored, I tried not to breathe too deeply. My pussy was wet and my clit was swelling.
"Lo and behold, if it isn't Mrs. Sutter."
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck! I quickly switched the app off and slipped my phone back into my clutch as Neil dropped into the seat next to me. He looked drunk already but then I took a closer look. He wasn't drunk, he looked like he had aged a decade in the six months I had avoided him. He looked old and tired.
"You look old and tired. That's not what I meant to say. I'm sorry. I meant to say, I heard about the divorce, I'm sorry about it. About the divorce I mean." My head was between my legs. A part of my brain was wondering why I had stopped vibrating my pussy and was making my clit pulse a little.
He was looking at me in a strange way. Something told me he knew exactly where my head was.
"You and your phone." I felt a shiver go up my spine, it wasn't a nice one.
"I was checking with the babysitter."
Neil leaned toward me and turned his head so that I could feel his breath on my cheek. He whispered into my ear.
"Do you like porn?"
I pulled my head away and assumed my best indignant expression.
"That... Is none of your business Neil. How could you ask me something like that? You're Liam's friend aren't you?"
"I have never discussed what's on your phone with Liam."
I turned and looked at the table, hoping he couldn't see me blushing in this light.
"I'm sure you have just as much on your phone as I do. We all do."
"Mmmm...but I watch porn to jerk off, you have a husband who could fuck that need right out of you."
I laughed. If only he knew. As if the jerk was reading my mind he turned his head back to the bar, where Liam was brown nosing somebody, drink in hand. Neil turned to face me again and I looked straight ahead, the other two women were drinking wine and giggling about something.
