Pat said Ryan would be at his most vulnerable after they reconnected. He advised her to take advantage of it and get him to open up.
"These aren't new feelings, but old feelings he's buried for years. We're just bringing them to the surface."
Pat was older, experienced, and very wise. As a teenager, Pat looked and carried himself like an adult. He was the star athlete and an outstanding student. He was so much more mature than other young men not just his age, but even older.
It was no surprise he drew married women to him like bees are drawn to honey. Experienced women who knew about sex, what they wanted, and what they were missing in a relationship. He learned a lot about human behavior in those years and continued to put it to use throughout his adult life.
Ryan and Moranda had just reconnected as cuckold couples do, with his face between her legs, pleasuring her while licking her clean of her lover's semen. His face was in her freshly fucked pussy, the taste reminding him of his inadequacy, but also arousing him.
Ryan remained kneeling between his mistress wife Moranda's legs, the smell of his uncle's seed in his nostrils and its metallic, gummy taste in his mouth.
He had just admitted to his wife when his cuckold fantasies began, early in his relationship with Moranda.
"Of course I was still dating others. I didn't know how serious you were. I didn't want to leave myself vulnerable."
He kissed her pubic mound and rested his face against it.
"You went out with a lot of different men. Just because you and I weren't doing much didn't mean you weren't doing a lot more with them. I was jealous as hell, but I wasn't one to issue ultimatums."
"I hated being jealous, but I also hated the thoughts I had. I spent a lot of nights masturbating while you were out on a date. I'm sure what I fantasized about wasn't even close to what happened."
Moranda asked, "What did you imagine me doing with them?"
"Everything. Hand jobs, blow jobs, intercourse, making out, having your breasts sucked, even being eaten. Over time, I realized I loved the idea and wanted it to happen."
"The feelings got stronger after we had intercourse. I was so bad at it. I felt like you deserved so much better. Remember, we even took a break from dating. You said it was to make me realize I shouldn't take you for granted."
"I never thought I took you for granted, but that was a long month. You even told me you expected me to stay home and I did while you went out with your friends and on dates."
"Now that we were having sex I figured you would definitely be having it with your dates. What was insane is part of me was hoping you did. At night in my bed I jacked off again and again imagining you with them, people I didn't even know."
"What sucked is how conflicted I felt. The jealousy I felt was real, but so was the arousal and the guilt and humiliation. I told myself what I was feeling I needed to keep secret so I did."
Moranda felt bad, "I wish we had been better communicators. There was a lot I wanted to tell you, but didn't. You have no idea how happy I am we're having this conversation. I feel like we're finally on the same sheet of music, don't you?"
He sensed she was talking about something bigger than her infidelities, past and present.
She tenderly stroked his scalp as it was time to drop the bomb, "And that's why our marriage needs to change, cuck. I'm his woman now. You get it don't you?"
He nodded he did.
"I know you do. That's why you made yourself pretty for me. You knew I would want you to be even softer. You even made room for him. I'm so proud of us, but especially you."
"Tomorrow night he's going to come over. I want you here, dressed like you are now. He won't freak out."
"I wished I had known back then all these feelings you were having which you never shared with me. I would have encouraged it if I had known."
"My dates were not nearly as exciting as your fantasies, but they were pretty good. How come you never asked about them?"
"I would have come across as super jealous. I thought it was better I just not say anything, pretend they weren't there."
Moranda said, "I have a confession to make. I did do more with them than I did with you. I wasn't serious about them like I was with you, but I didn't want you to think of me just as a sex object."
"What did you do with them?"
"A lot of what I did with you. Lots of kissing. A few I let suck my tits and finger me. Most of them weren't very good at kissing and definitely not at fingering. In desperation I grabbed one boy's hand and showed him where my clitoris was and instructed him on what to do."
She laughed, "It worked because I had a really good orgasm."
"Are you getting excited, Ryan? I bet that cage feels really tight."
"It does. Did you ever touch or suck their cocks?"
"You must have thought I was a real slut. I suppose I owe you an answer, but yes I did both. I was curious. No one licked me before you did."
He realized she was much more experienced than he was, but oddly enough, he found it comforting.
She then reminded him, "And remember, we were each other's firsts when we lost our virginities. I know you think it was a disaster, but I thought our first time was so sweet. I'm glad we were clumsy. I'm so glad you were my first."
"Me too," he replied, accepting he could never deliver with his cock what she deserved and needed.
Her intent was to start a dialogue, not just a monologue where Ryan spilled his guts and confessed to fantasies he had been having for years. She wondered if his dad had been the same or did his mom lead him down that path.
