Mr. NaΓ―ve and Ms. Gullible got married one day. They had a baby named Cheryl. Luckily, they were apparently good looking because their daughter was absolutely gorgeous. The first time I met her, she had long, black straight hair, bedroom eyes, and a 34-23-35 body that stood a statuesque 5'10". Every man's wet dream.
I am Raymond, or Ray, or Ray-Ray, or R.J. thanks to the comedian R.J. Johnson. I was in a bar the first saw the woman I found out was named Cheryl. She was with a herd of young women that had attracted a pack of wolves. They had culled Cheryl from the herd and were closing in for the kill. I watched as one would order a liquor straight, then when Cheryl was not looking, dump the liquor in her drink, thereby doubling its potency. It seemed to be having the intended affect. She was fighting off their hands less and less.
My rescuer senses were on alert. I was fidgeting on my bar stool trying to decide whether or not to intervene, especially since she was not asking for help and there were four wolves to my one rescue dog. Suddenly, Cheryl's herd decided to leave. They said something to her and left. Cheryl looked stupefied but was soon distracted by the attention of the men.
As the women passed me on the way out, I asked why they were abandoning their friend. The red-head said, "She does this every time we go out. She attracts the men for us, but sometimes, like tonight, the men only want to be around her. They think she is easy after a few drinks, and they are right. Don't worry, one or more of the guys will take Cheryl to his place and then take her home after they're done with her."
The red-head's attitude pissed me off. I edged closer to the pack to catch the conversation. The men were competing on who could tell the most vulgar double entendre they could think of. Cheryl never caught on and wondered out loud why the men were laughing. The man were pressing for Cheryl to go out to the car with them. She said she had a ride, so she didn't understand why she had to go to their car. Cheryl complained that they said they wanted to 'show her something' but wouldn't tell her what the something was. They appeared to have just about talked her into it when I intervened.
I came up to the group and asked Cheryl to dance. The men objected, saying she was with them. Cheryl protested that she was with her girlfriends although she didn't know where they were. "I came to dance, and you guys just want to get me outside." Luckily, I must have looked good enough to Cheryl that she accepted my invitation, much to the chagrin of the wolf pack.
On the dance floor, Cheryl plastered herself to my body. I stopped and asked her to put a little distance between us. She was surprised. "All the guys seem to want to dance really close. Why don't you?"
"I would like to get to know you a little better before I feel your breasts against my chest, and you feel my bulge against your mound."
Cheryl's mouth dropped open. "Is that what they were doing? OMG." That's when I first became sure of Cheryl's parentage.
She was having trouble standing up, she was so intoxicated. I informed her that her girlfriends had abandoned her. Cheryl asked out loud, "How will I get home?"
I said that I would like to take her for a cup of coffee at Starbucks, and then I would take her home. She said, "Okay." It didn't phase her in the least to have a perfect stranger take her home. I sighed in disbelief.
We went back to the table where the wolfpack was waiting. She grabbed her purse and said, "Thanks for the good time, guys. I'm going home now."
The wolfpack protested and the guy who had groped Cheryl the most stood up, so he was right in my face. "You ain't taking her anywhere, asshole. We've been paying for her drinks all night. If anyone takes her home, it will be us. So, fuck off man before I put you down."
I pulled Cheryl away from the standoff. "Wait there. I will only be a second." I was hoping my apparent confidence would lower his. It didn't.
Just as the fight was about to commence, one of the guys said, "Wait a minute. Aren't you Ray 'The Annihilator' Johnson?" I nodded. The guy informed his friend of my reputation as a MMA fighter. "Dude, he's like undefeated. Puts most of his opponents in the hospital." I corrected the guy saying I was 13-2. By then the bar fight that never was, ended. They wished us both a good night.
Cheryl commented as we left, "I thought MBAs were like accountants." Thus started my first of many explanations to Cheryl. I was smart enough to explain without appearing to 'teach.' I never wanted her to feel like she was dumb. NaΓ―ve and gullible, yes. Dumb, no.
We sat down over a cup of coffee and talked. Well, she talked mostly. It seemed to be her nature to do so. I didn't object as I figured her brain cells needed activity to counteract the dulling effects of the alcohol. She basically told me her life story. Here is my spin on what she said.
Cheryl had been very popular in high school. She had a series of steady boyfriends and breakups. Somehow, she missed the connection between her requiring them to go steady and her giving them the privilege of bedding her. Her grades were too low for college, so she became a teacher's aide for a kindergarten class. She loved the job and was very good with young children. Cheryl stayed popular and had been engaged three times since high school. Again, no ring, no nookie. Her hope was to find a good man and have a family. She only looked, however, in places where good men seldom frequented, current company included.
By the time I took her home, I knew there was more to her than beauty, although I sure didn't discount the value of that. She was a warm, caring, trusting, vulnerable, compassionate woman. I was a goner.
I walked her to her front door and said, "Good night" and turned towards my car.
She said, "Wait. I thought you had a good time."
"I did. Why do you think I didn't?"
"Well, usually the guy wants to kiss and caress me and try to get me to invite him in."
"Cheryl, you are a special girl. I want us to take our time to get to know each other. I think our relationship might be able to last a long time."
"A few months?"
I sighed. "No, longer. A lot longer."
"Oh." She smiled and went inside.
We started dating. I tried to take her out every available night, partly because I wanted to be with her and partly because I wanted to protect her. She needed protection because in the battle of the sexes, she was too often bringing a knife to a gun fight. Our progression in physical expression of affection escalated as time went on. She was never hesitant to take our lovemaking to whatever the next level was. We were getting close to the 'ring or no nookie' level.
I called Cheryl for a date one night. She said that the girls had called her and begged her to go out with them. I assumed they had trouble attracting guys without her. I said I didn't think that was a good idea. I didn't dare tell her why. Instead, I said that I was afraid that the girls she was with would drink too much. I was afraid of her being in an accident. Since she seemed determined to go, I made an offer: Go out with the girls. Then at a set time, I would come pick her up. That way I could be sure she got home safely. She thought that was wonderful and praised me for being such a good guy.
The first time I went to pick her up, no one was happy: the flirting guys hoping to score, the girls needing the honey to attract male flies, and me because Cheryl was wanting to stay longer. I was not having it. It was obvious she had been making out with the guys-her lipstick was streaked and her blouse halfway unbuttoned. I told her she had to come because of the important things she had to do the next morning. She agreed and came with me, asking me to remind her of what it was she had to do tomorrow. Luckily, she fell asleep in the car without my having to answer her.
When I dropped her off, I decided it was time. I needed to be THE man in her life for my sake and hers. I did the special dinner at the fancy restaurant bit. Champagne was brought to our table. A big diamond ring was in her flute. She went to take a sip and saw the ring. Her response was immediate, "Has anyone lost a ring? I found one in my glass." It took a while to explain to her that it was her ring and what it was for. Once that was accomplished, she started crying while blurting out, "Yes!" The other patrons that night got a good laugh, but applauded once Cheryl accepted.
Cheryl's enthusiasm stopped abruptly. She asked, "Are you marrying me for me or just my looks?" Good question.
"Sweetheart, you are God's gift to me. It helps that the wrapping paper got my attention, but it who you are inside that makes me really love you." Her happy mood resumed.
My mother and Cheryl's mother handled the wedding planning. Everything was going well, but I began to worry about the bachelorette party. Cheryl's friends had arranged the entertainment. I was smart enough to make sure my sister was invited. The next day, my sister reported that a male stripper had been hired. Almost all the women, including the perspective bride, welcomed him enthusiastically. The stripper was going down the row of girls, and each of Cheryl's friends took their turn blowing him while he massaged their tits. Cheryl was about to take her turn. My sister intervened. She told Cheryl that everything was being taped and asked if she thought her husband to be would like to see her blow another man just before the marriage. Cheryl said, "But we're not married yet."
My sister said, "If you want to be left at the altar tomorrow, blow away." She walked away from Cheryl. Cheryl looked at the dick in front of her for a while. Finally, she shook her head no. Her girlfriends begged, cajoled, threatened, and insulted her to get her to do it. Cheryl refused. Although I was hurt that Cheryl had even considered having oral sex with another man, I was glad my sister had talked her out of it. I knew that Cheryl did not think oral sex was 'sex' per se and would not have thought she was cheating on me. Most women who say oral sex is not sex say that in order to rationalize cheating. I felt sure that Cheryl honestly believed oral sex was not sex.
After the wedding and the weeks that followed, Cheryl and I had many talks about what was and was not acceptable behavior towards the opposite sex by a husband and a wife. She seemed a little surprised in what I said based on what she had seen from married men and women at the clubs she had gone to. By the way, going to clubs without me was now a banned behavior. I was not sure that what she had agreed to would last after a few drinks.
Our married life progressed well for the first few years. The sex was absolutely fantastic as expected. Cheryl proved to be a proficient housekeeper and cook although I probably helped out in those regards more than the usual husband. I rewarded her randomly with flowers, candy, and small gifts. When I had to go out of town on business, she took off work and went with me. We created many good memories. Life was good.
I guess I got complacent. Our life changed with entrance of a villain. Marty Overstreet became the principal of her school. Marty was my nemesis from the sixth grade on. He was the neighborhood and school bully. He was a couple of years older than me and much larger. Somehow, I became his favorite target for abuse. The only good thing I can say about my early fighting skills was that I kept coming back. For several years, I got my ass handed to me on a platter on a regular basis. I never would tell my parents or the school who was beating me up. One day, another kid told on Marty and the school suspended him for three days. I got beat up worse those three days than any previous time.